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Deadshot108

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Deadshot108
  • Town/Country : Mill Creek , USA
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Saturday 27 July 1985 (28 years)
  • Number of visits : 842
  • Number of comments : 39
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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Today, I was reading my girlfriend's girly magazine. There was an article stating that if a girl tells a guy his dick is the perfect size, she really means that it is too small. My girlfriend claims everything in the magazine is right. She told me my dick was the perfect size last weekend. FML

Today, I was on an Easyjet flight, next to two attractive girls, listening to a track which starts with a woman pleasuring herself. I don't like this track so I go to skip it but accidentally unplug my headphones, activating my phone speakers and revealing the said woman at the peak of her orgasm. FML

#121719
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20262) - you deserved it (49880)

On 02/24/2009 at 6:57am - intimacy - by Byron fiddles (man) - Hungary (Budapest)

Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, "Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!" He looked at me and replied, "How about some blue shut the fuck up?!" FML

#56665
496 comments

I agree, your life sucks (213608) - you deserved it (73278)

On 02/16/2009 at 9:29pm - kids - by offbeans (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was trying on lingerie in the dressing room of Victoria’s Secret with my boyfriend next to me. I told my him in a seductive, playful tone “You can stay and watch if you give me a piece of your gum.” He said “No I only have three more” and left the room. FML

#45949
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37947) - you deserved it (5290)

On 02/15/2009 at 6:35am - misc - by cjk004 - United States (California)

Today, I woke up with the worst hangover of my life. My best friend comes over and informs me that I had sex with my girlfriend's two best friends last night. Awesome! Then I realized her best friends are guys. FML

#4044
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8394) - you deserved it (40678)

On 01/31/2009 at 9:43am - intimacy - by Ah hell - United States (Ohio)

Today, in class, I asked my teacher for a "rubber". I didn't realise that in America "rubber" doesn't mean "eraser", it means condom. FML

#2256
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51487) - you deserved it (6994)

On 01/22/2009 at 7:42pm - intimacy - by TheEnglishOne - United States (California)



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