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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I went to the bathroom and my pee split into 4 different streams, none of which actually hit the toilet. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19766) - you deserved it (5068)
On 01/11/2011 at 12:32am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, an old man started telling me about the high price of meat. I told him I wouldn't know, since I'm a vegetarian. His reply was, "Oh, most vegetarians are slimmer." FML
I agree, your life sucks (18187) - you deserved it (6113)
On 01/10/2011 at 12:16pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, my boss decided to post a photo of a piece of crap on Facebook. He tagged me in it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20640) - you deserved it (2916)
On 01/07/2011 at 8:31pm - work - by poop (man) - United States (Missouri)
Today, feeling melancholy, I took a blanket out to the backyard and lay down to look at the clouds. My dad came out to ask me what I was doing. I told him, he smirked, squatted over my face, and farted. He then ran back inside and told my mom. She laughed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23205) - you deserved it (4417)
On 01/06/2011 at 9:45pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, I was out running. All of a sudden I saw a dog come towards me, I thought it was going to attack me and I screamed like a girl in front of everyone. It was a puppy wanting to play. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5922) - you deserved it (19344)
On 01/04/2011 at 9:44pm - animals - by BIZZMAL - United States
Today, my boyfriend decided to re-enact a scene from Family Guy. He locked me in the car with him and farted deadly ones repeatedly. He wouldn't let me out until I learned to "love the gas." FML
I agree, your life sucks (31804) - you deserved it (6157)
On 01/04/2011 at 3:09pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Reserved
Today, on the train, I was bitten by a homeless man. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33639) - you deserved it (3512)
On 12/29/2010 at 2:03am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, I was in a very crowded train coming home from work. I saw a cute guy sitting across from me. As I lifted my one leg to hook it over my other leg, I let out a loud fart. All I could do was sit there and wait for my stop. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20421) - you deserved it (7779)
On 12/28/2010 at 10:39am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - South Africa (Western Cape)
Today, my husband yawned in the middle of our wedding vows. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26011) - you deserved it (5084)
On 12/27/2010 at 12:52pm - love - by ohmy. - United States (Illinois)
Today, my boyfriend and I were in our room getting hot and heavy. As he was entering me, he started making electronic whirring sounds. Once inside, he said in a robotic voice, "Initiating launch sequence in 3... 2... 1..." and began thrusting as fast as possible. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34373) - you deserved it (6992)
On 12/25/2010 at 8:38am - intimacy - by Jessie - United States (Texas)
Today, I was in a store with my dad. He completely lost his temper and began yelling at the store owners. For some reason, he then removed his shirt in protest. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27170) - you deserved it (2021)
Today, I saw Saw IV with my boyfriend. He held me close and said, "I'll protect you." A few seconds later, he jumped up so violently, he gave me a bloody nose, and ran screaming out of the room. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24712) - you deserved it (3047)
On 12/18/2010 at 2:14pm - love - by asdfghjkl (woman) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, the guy who got off when the elevator's doors opened had a very embarrassed look on his face. I didn't think anything of it till the doors closed. Turns out he was running away from his deadly fart. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18674) - you deserved it (1979)
On 12/18/2010 at 12:56am - misc - by lizard (woman) - United States (Missouri)
Today, as I got to my first class seat on an airplane, I saw the person I'd be sitting next to wafting the smell of her vagina towards herself and breathing in deeply. It's an eight hour flight. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33443) - you deserved it (2638)
On 12/17/2010 at 8:28pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, while giving a brief presentation at work, I blanked out on what I was going to say. I tried to make a joke and tell them I'd had a brain fart, but all I managed to say was "I farted". Well, at least they all laughed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22750) - you deserved it (6331)
On 12/15/2010 at 6:57am - work - by Mike -
Friday 24 May 2013
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