Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Danc3NathanDanc3

Search for a member

Danc3NathanDanc3

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 436
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

Danc3NathanDanc3's FML badges

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

See all of Danc3NathanDanc3's badges

Danc3NathanDanc3's favorite FMLs

Today, my family threw me my 21st birthday party. My grandma's gift turned out to be a pack of condoms. "Not that you'll ever get to use them," she said, turning and walking off, cackling maniacally. Now I remember why I never talk to the old crone. FML

#20536189
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26813) - you deserved it (3543)

On 03/08/2013 at 7:38pm - misc - by fuck you, gran (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I showed my wife an article about how frequent orgasms can prevent prostate cancer, as well as increase both partners' overall health. She replied that she wouldn't judge me if I masturbated, as long as I don't use porn. FML

#20536129
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35399) - you deserved it (8562)

On 03/08/2013 at 6:36pm - intimacy - by marriage/celibacy/synonymity (man) - Norway (Hordaland)

Today, my boyfriend came over and dropped off my phone, which I'd left at his place the night before. He immediately left in a sulk. As I looked through my texts, I discovered he was only so moody because I hadn't answered any of his calls or messages. I'm dating an idiot. FML

#20535997
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33466) - you deserved it (5014)

On 03/08/2013 at 4:22pm - love - by Kiki (woman) - Poland (Malopolskie)

Today, I bought a textbook for my college class. Not only is the £150 book only sold by our teacher, it turned out to be a piece of shit that he obviously wrote, printed, and stapled together at home. When I went to the faculty about it, I was told it's all perfectly legal, and to drop it. FML

#20535847
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31069) - you deserved it (2620)

On 03/08/2013 at 1:44pm - money - by defrauded (woman) - United Kingdom (Argyll and Bute)

Today, I sat through an incredibly long and tedious class lecture. Just as my professor was nearing the end of his lecture, the resident stoner loudly yawned and asked what we'd been talking about for the past hour. We got to hear most of the lecture all over again. FML

#20535789
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26700) - you deserved it (2002)

On 03/08/2013 at 12:44pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Netherlands (Limburg)

Today, my teacher read my story about a haunted house for a class assignment. She liked it very much and turned it in to the office to be sent into a state writing competition. An hour later, I was called to the office where the guidance counselor called my work "disturbing" and said I "need help". FML

#20535562
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32741) - you deserved it (2516)

On 03/08/2013 at 6:29am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my dad and I had an hour-long conversation. When he was getting up to leave my room he said, "Good talk Chelsey." My sister is Chelsey. So I corrected him. He thought I was joking. My father can't tell my sister and I apart. We are not twins. FML

#20535549
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34723) - you deserved it (2153)

On 03/08/2013 at 5:51am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I finally got the courage to confess my feelings to the guy I have loved for a year now in a long note. He called half an hour later and said, "I'm not going to read this crap, just tell me what it says". FML

#20535268
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31420) - you deserved it (7278)

On 03/07/2013 at 10:53pm - love - by hoolabaloo (woman) - India (Gujarat)

Today, after my 5-year-old finally got over his grandmother's death, we went to a store and saw a lady that looked exactly like her. She came up to us asking if we saw her grandson; I can't get my son to stop freaking out. FML

#20535134
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36791) - you deserved it (2156)

On 03/07/2013 at 8:55pm - kids - by Maxie - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was taking a patient's blood pressure, and listening for his pulse with my stethoscope. I couldn't hear anything, so I adjusted the cuff and tried again. Still no pulse. He pointed out that my stethoscope was the wrong way around and sneered, "You been smokin' the reefer, boy?" FML

#20535043
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12944) - you deserved it (31993)

On 03/07/2013 at 7:35pm - work - by no sir I have not (man) - United States

Today, I was fired from my job for breaking my company's tattoo policy. I have a small scar on my wrist that roughly resembles a heart. My boss insists that it's one of those white ink tattoos. No one will believe me. FML

#20534364
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37389) - you deserved it (2211)

On 03/07/2013 at 3:17am - work - by crap - United States

Today, I sent a dozen roses and a hand-written, heart-felt note to my ex-girlfriend to show her that I'm still madly in love with her. When I asked if she got the flowers I sent, she replied, "Yeah but you got the wrong color. You should've gotten yellow, that stands for friendship." FML

#20534297
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31347) - you deserved it (11436)

On 03/07/2013 at 1:07am - love - by Roses are Red - United States (Mississippi)

Today, I met a guy in a bar. He was sweet and funny so I asked him out for coffee later. He quickly turned me down, saying that I didn't even meet his first requirement. His first requirement was "looks like a girl." FML

#20534087
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32177) - you deserved it (3907)

On 03/06/2013 at 10:14pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was so bored at a dinner party that I went to the bathroom to play games on my phone. One of my co-workers came in, so I rushed into a stall, but forgot to turn my phone's sound off. She heard it and said, "It's OK, music helps me shit too" and started blasting her music and grunting. FML

#20534043
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27633) - you deserved it (6307)

On 03/06/2013 at 9:39pm - work - by shittysongs - United States (Washington)

Today, my boyfriend of a year and a half left me for another girl. Who was the only person who cared enough to comfort me? The girl he left me for. FML

#20533752
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34242) - you deserved it (2370)

On 03/06/2013 at 5:28pm - love - by ForeverAlone (woman) - United States (Missouri)



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #2: In slow-moving hell
  • It was once a dream, now it’s come true. We’re at the place that was allocated months ago for preprogrammed, enforced holiday fun time. We’ve put on some cargo shorts, slipped on some of those…

Wednesday 13 August 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: