Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

CrazyManNo9

Offline (the 01/28/2016 at 5:43pm) | Search for a member

CrazyManNo9

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2928
  • Number of comments : 439
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About CrazyManNo9 : Entreprenuer

CrazyManNo9's page activity

Visits<b>Alexandria79</b> - the 12/01/2015 at 5:34pm<b>turtkko</b> - the 06/19/2015 at 3:59pm<b>Kidjazzin</b> - the 06/16/2015 at 3:13am<b>Abhinow</b> - the 06/06/2015 at 3:31pm<b>D_Word_Head</b> - the 05/11/2015 at 6:24pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 04/08/2015 at 9:31pm<b>Unsophisticated</b> - the 03/12/2015 at 4:01pm<b>rocker_chick23</b> - the 02/01/2015 at 12:29pm<b>KatlynBrooke</b> - the 11/24/2014 at 12:21am<b>yoursucklives</b> - the 09/16/2014 at 5:31pm<b>kelseysking</b> - the 09/04/2014 at 4:55pm<b>dying_to_know</b> - the 09/04/2014 at 11:48am<b>limon18</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 5:00am<b>xGetMuted</b> - the 08/25/2014 at 3:37pm<b>GanJwAR15</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 1:42pm<b>BlueDragoon</b> - the 08/15/2014 at 2:32pm<b>Lahariim</b> - the 06/13/2014 at 4:48pm<b>Kordellf</b> - the 05/28/2014 at 9:51pm

Fucked!<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 3:30am

CrazyManNo9's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

I NEED to know!

You went as far as reading the terms of use. You’re a total FML completist.

See all of CrazyManNo9's badges

CrazyManNo9's favorite FMLs

Today, I sampled some of the food my fiancée's mom is making for our wedding. Everything tasted terrible, and I almost vomited. Turns out she never actually went to culinary school as she claimed, but had just watched Julie and Julia. It's too late to book another caterer for the wedding. FML

#20145916
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26743) - you deserved it (5403)

On 11/03/2012 at 3:42pm - health - by WeddingWoes (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I realized why it's a bad idea to store your business cards and your "emergency condom" in the same handbag compartment. I realized this after a client watched me miss the cards and pull out the condom after our lunch meeting. FML

#20144136
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7471) - you deserved it (27144)

On 11/02/2012 at 7:35am - work - by Hornymuch (woman) - Germany

Today, after a week of looking for my car keys and being forced to drag my family around on public transportation, my wife found the keys in our car's ignition. FML

#20142914
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7451) - you deserved it (30443)

On 11/01/2012 at 1:09pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Philippines (Manila)

Today, I texted my boyfriend saying that I couldn't wait for him to get home and see my costume, and that I had dressed up as a naked lady. He texted back asking if I could dress up as someone who was making dinner instead. FML

#20142541
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34621) - you deserved it (7119)

On 11/01/2012 at 3:54am - intimacy - by okay._. - United States (California)

Today, I had surgery on my arm. My mom has recently had the same surgery and my dad is having his first rib removed and won't be able to move his arm. My family combined now has three functioning arms. FML

#20142449
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24986) - you deserved it (1748)

On 11/01/2012 at 1:08am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)

Today, I worked up the courage to give a guy my number. I wrote it down on a piece of paper, tore it in half and gave it to him. Later, I noticed I'd given him the wrong, blank half. FML

#20142410
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22083) - you deserved it (11279)

On 11/01/2012 at 12:24am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Mexico)

Today, I was handing candy to a little boy who was trick or treating by himself. He was small enough to grab the candy and run past me into my house. I've been searching my house for two hours and still can't find him. I'm afraid to go to sleep. FML

#20142294
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36746) - you deserved it (2654)

On 10/31/2012 at 11:04pm - kids - by ananymous - United States (New York)

Today, I found out that my over-controlling parents would be moving in next door. I'm almost 23, and moved 5,365 KM away to get away from them. FML

#20142163
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30136) - you deserved it (1811)

On 10/31/2012 at 9:39pm - misc - by OhLovely (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I dressed up like a pirate, dressed my dog as a parrot and bought $30 worth of candy to pass out to trick-or-treaters. I waited by the door for 3 hours. Not one kid came. FML

#20142085
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29750) - you deserved it (2789)

On 10/31/2012 at 8:40pm - misc - by hallofail (man) - United States (Alabama)

Today, while giving a speech at work, I started sneezing. After what seemed to be the last sneeze, I went on talking. Apparently it wasn't, and I blew out my eardrum. FML

#20141826
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25688) - you deserved it (1739)

On 10/31/2012 at 5:03pm - work - by SoSoRachel - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was at a barbeque with my family, my boyfriend, and some mutual acquaintances. Someone jokingly called my boyfriend a pussy, to which he loudly replied, "I guess I am what I eat!" My mother was sitting across from us. FML

#20141794
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28171) - you deserved it (3909)

On 10/31/2012 at 4:24pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was cleaning out my roof's gutter, which was full of leaves. There was an especially big pile, and when I started scooping it up, I felt something squishy. Turns out those leaves were covering the remains of a rotting squirrel. I can't stop smelling it. FML

#20141617
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24436) - you deserved it (1833)

On 10/31/2012 at 1:23pm - animals - by orilykid (man) - United States (California)

Today, I discovered a brown recluse spider in my house. Before I could smash it, it escaped under the door. Now I'm freaked out and wearing boots and gloves, clutching at my kittens and waiting for it to appear. My dad laughs everytime he walks past. FML

#20141607
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23021) - you deserved it (4352)

On 10/31/2012 at 1:09pm - animals - by NotSpiderman (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I went to a big family dinner. I didn't realize I hadn't been invited until we were about to sit down to eat. There were 12 chairs, 12 plates, 12 forks, and 12 glasses. I was the 13th person to arrive. FML

#20141489
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25966) - you deserved it (2495)

On 10/31/2012 at 10:37am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, the bar owner I work for told us to pay better attention to our drunk patrons, and to start cutting them off. A fellow bar maid asked how we are supposed to tell when it's time. He pointed at me and said, "When they start hitting on her, they're too drunk to drive." FML

#20141378
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29690) - you deserved it (2123)

On 10/31/2012 at 7:30am - work - by kat (woman) - United States (Florida)



Maïté Verjux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Auntie Bernie delivers in 2016
  • Greetings my young friends! It's 2016 and I'm late. No, I'm not pregnant, I'm way too old for that sort of thing, even though I've been trying a lot recently (hey there Didier, you randy rascal…

Friday 5 February 2016

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: