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ChrisKT92

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ChrisKT92

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  • Number of visits : 220
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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ChrisKT92's page activity

Visits<b>MCRaddict15</b> - the 10/14/2013 at 5:02am<b>DWordHead16</b> - the 09/18/2013 at 3:37pm<b>jadeluv</b> - the 08/24/2013 at 4:48am<b>trbuson</b> - the 08/02/2013 at 3:43am<b>mrjiggles1992</b> - the 06/25/2013 at 2:58pm<b>dreamchaser101</b> - the 04/12/2013 at 7:22pm<b>sweatypandalove</b> - the 04/05/2013 at 9:57pm

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ChrisKT92's favorite FMLs

Today, I got a new cell phone number and sent a text to my wife. Playing around, I said, "Hey sexy are you alone yet? I'm ready to come over." She responded with, "Hey, yeah he is at work - did you get a new number?" FML

#20941049
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (86141) - you deserved it (6175)

On 11/01/2013 at 3:01am - intimacy - by PapaW - United States (Utah)

Today, I realized that my dog is an evil genius. As I sat down to have a snack, he barked as if he saw someone outside. I went to check it out, but nobody was there. When I returned, I found my dog on the table finishing off my bacon sandwich. FML

#20908563
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42470) - you deserved it (7758)

On 10/05/2013 at 4:23pm - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Manchester)

Today, I was reminded that while I have a nice waist, bum and boobs, I'm unspeakably ugly. I was walking down the street when a guy wolf-whistled from behind me, and when I turned around, he visibly recoiled in disgust. FML

#20908389
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46386) - you deserved it (3797)

On 10/05/2013 at 1:51pm - misc - by british_babe (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I was all set to lose my virginity to my girlfriend. I was ecstatic, until she threatened to "beat the fuck" out of me if I didn't make it good for her. The actual sex was 30 seconds of me being given death glares, causing me to lose my boner and have to leave in shame. FML

#20899471
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61414) - you deserved it (7213)

On 09/28/2013 at 5:24pm - intimacy - by :( (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, while sitting in a crowded waiting room at the doctor's office, my 5-year-old daughter pointed at my 6-year-old son's crotch and boomed, "MOM, WHY DOES ANDY HAVE A FINGER DOWN THERE?" to which he yelled, "IT'S CALLED A COCK!" FML

#20898150
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48709) - you deserved it (6369)

On 09/27/2013 at 4:00pm - kids - by SerenityJ (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was talking to my husband about our favorite TV show, when he took my face in his hands and sweetly whispered, "You're so pretty. Why must you ruin it with words?" FML

#20880791
102 comments

Today, I told the guy I liked about my crush on him. He said he would keep me in mind if he ever hits rock bottom. FML

#20786950
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45850) - you deserved it (3369)

On 07/16/2013 at 7:41pm - love - by hannahisacooler (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my grandma's new dildo arrived in the mail. We buried her yesterday. FML

#20731352
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68845) - you deserved it (3949)

On 06/17/2013 at 12:43pm - intimacy - by hinting (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was riding a bike when a truck accidentally hit me. The handsome driver came out and asked if I was alright. I said, "I am now" and winked. He said "Eww, no" then immediately ran away and drove his truck around me. FML

#20724353
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39830) - you deserved it (25072)

On 06/13/2013 at 9:44pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I ordered some burgers at a fast food joint. When I said, "No lettuce," the cashier looked dumbfounded and asked, "What's that?" I literally had to say, "The green stuff" before she got it. I'm losing hope. FML

#20724048
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50575) - you deserved it (3428)

On 06/13/2013 at 6:12pm - misc - by thatisfuckedup - United Kingdom

Today, I woke up to my 5-year-old son covering my nose and mouth with his hand and complaining, "Noooo, you need to die now." FML

#20695159
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62290) - you deserved it (4982)

On 05/30/2013 at 12:29pm - kids - by life insurance for 1 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I accidentally hit a cyclist with my car. In panic, I jumped out of my car and ran up to him, who was lying on the floor, motionless. As I was about to check his pulse, he jumped up and shouted, "I bet you thought I was dead, asshole!" He then punched me in the face and cycled off. FML

#20688904
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50678) - you deserved it (23542)

On 05/27/2013 at 7:19am - misc - by i hit a cyclist (man) - United Kingdom (Nottingham)

Today, I asked my father if he was proud that I have never done drugs, never drank alcohol, never had sex, never had psychological problems, never been to the hospital for something serious, never been in a fight and maintain good grades. He told me I was a boring daughter. FML

#20657738
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51244) - you deserved it (18242)

On 05/12/2013 at 1:01am - misc - by peallow (woman) - Puerto Rico

Today, I woke up to the sound of my newborn screaming. I frantically hopped out of bed and stumbled into the nursery where I was met by the priceless sight of my five-year-old daughter attempting to breastfeed her understandably frustrated little brother. FML

#20644821
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64498) - you deserved it (5948)

On 05/06/2013 at 2:29am - kids - by SkeetinKeaton (man) - United States

Today, I can no longer leave my son at daycare, because at the age of 5, he's started manipulating the girls there into fighting over him. A kid lost a baby tooth in one such brawl. FML

#20607466
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49225) - you deserved it (6435)

On 04/20/2013 at 12:34pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Thailand



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