Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

ChickenLegs937

Search for a member

ChickenLegs937
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1559
  • Number of comments : 33
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

ChickenLegs937's last visitors

singer0421iluvboobies

ChickenLegs937's FML badges

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

See all of ChickenLegs937's badges

ChickenLegs937's favorite FMLs

Today, I was washing a stainless steel pot at my kitchen job. Every time I pulled it out of the dishwasher and examined it for dirt, I saw something orange inside it. After 3 run-throughs, I realized it was just my shirts reflection. FML

#8324866
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4250) - you deserved it (22477)

On 02/16/2010 at 12:23am - work - by 3Airwalk3 (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I found out that I was not adopted and in fact my parents are my biological parents. How did I find out? Over dinner. How long have I been believing I was adopted? 22 years. Why did I start believing I was adopted? My siblings thought it would be a funny joke. My mom played along. FML

#8124338
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37757) - you deserved it (2611)

On 02/11/2010 at 7:22am - misc - by Biological (man) - United States (California)

Today, I discovered my brother likes to use our kitchen utensils to scratch his private areas. FML

#8040620
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26468) - you deserved it (1799)

On 02/09/2010 at 1:40am - health - by utensils123 (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I received a phone call from my son's school. Apparently, for the past week he has been telling everyone "mummy works as a drug dealer." I'm a pharmacist. FML

Today, I had a blind date. When I arrived at our meeting place, I spotted my date, because he was the only one in the bar wearing a nametag. I walked up to him and asked, "Are you John?" He responded, "That depends. Are you Jen?" When I said yes he said, "Then no," and left. FML

#7056556
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30275) - you deserved it (3019)

On 12/31/2009 at 12:33pm - love - by lifesux (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I gave my boyfriend a box of chocolates as a present. A few hours later, he texted me saying that the box of chocolates contained nuts. He's allergic to nuts and his mother now thinks I'm trying to kill him. FML

#6965324
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16505) - you deserved it (7889)

On 12/26/2009 at 11:44pm - love - by Kelly (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend and I got into a huge fight. Instead of taking me home like he told me he was going to, he pulled up to the gas station, gave me $6, and asked me to go pay. As soon as I walked inside, he threw my bag out the door, and drove off. FML

Today, for the third time this week, my boss made me switch desks. Each new desk is closer to the door than the last one. I think he's trying to tell me something. FML

#6479352
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25572) - you deserved it (2120)

On 11/27/2009 at 2:51pm - work - by Fmyoffice (man) - United Kingdom (Lincolnshire)

Today, I found out that if you lose contact with people in your previous school, they decide to spread rumors about you and make everyone believe that you're dead. FML

#6365565
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24787) - you deserved it (2893)

On 11/19/2009 at 4:03am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I found out I will not be getting my class ring. The jeweler has a policy against doing engravings that contain "obscene or offensive language or phrases". What obscene phrase did I want? My initials and year. W.T.F. 2010. FML

#6354793
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33138) - you deserved it (2337)

On 11/18/2009 at 2:41pm - misc - by Grad2010 (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I had a police officer come to my house because I've been reported missing. My friends online decided to call the police because I haven't signed in for 6 days. FML

#6191568
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29978) - you deserved it (5830)

On 11/07/2009 at 1:55am - misc - by iheartvodka (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I was trying on dresses in a stall that requires an employee of the store to have a key to open. After I took off one dress to go to another, an employee quickly opens my door, to give the stall to someone else. The entire store could see me in my granny panties and bra. FML

#5631961
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29174) - you deserved it (5728)

On 10/03/2009 at 10:56pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I got an iPhone, I was excited and because I have a new number I wanted to mess with my girl a little. I started sending her provocative messages, and after 4 or 5 of them, I discovered I had entered her number wrong and was talking dirty to a man named Noah. FML

#5554431
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5718) - you deserved it (26329)

On 09/29/2009 at 8:48pm - intimacy - by pummy (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I learned that if you're going to tell your mother you are gay, make sure she isn't holding a frying pan filled with hot grease. FML

#5530332
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54293) - you deserved it (12777)

On 09/28/2009 at 5:00pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I was in class, playing online poker and keeping up my winning record. I eventually got seated against a guy who beat me at every hand. I heard laughing behind me after I lost all my winnings. The guy behind me had just made an account, looked over my shoulder, and won all my money. FML

#5333449
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14025) - you deserved it (46246)

On 09/18/2009 at 3:15pm - money - by shushingmoon (man) - United States (Louisiana)



FML's blog

  • Zoé's Illustrated FML
  • Hey there, young whippersnappers. Yes, you, the youth. I’m talking to you, sitting at home, scratching your asses. Why aren’t you doing something more constructive with your lives? Stop watching that shit…

Friday 18 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: