This member hasn't filled in their description.
ChickenLegs937's FML badges
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
Up and coming moderator
It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
I agree, their lives suck
200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.
ChickenLegs937's favorite FMLs
by blk8764 / 03/15/2011 at 6:35pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous
Today, I got a call from my long distance girlfriend. She's about a month pregnant. I haven't seen her in person for six months, but she still insists it's mine. I don't know which would be worse: her lying or her being that stupid. FML
by notthedad / 03/15/2011 at 11:50am / China / Love
by Kimberlie / 03/15/2011 at 5:23am / United States (Missouri) / Love
Today, my new boyfriend was at my flat for the first time. He picked up something in the bathroom and said 'What the hell's this?'. I told him what it was for, and he said 'You girls and your weird female products. Who needs all this stuff?'. It wasn't a female thing. It was shampoo. FML
by cleangirl / 03/14/2011 at 7:45pm / United Kingdom (Fife) / Miscellaneous
by Albert06 / 03/14/2011 at 5:26pm / France / Love
Today, while practicing my gymnastics routine on the uneven bars, I was so distracted by my teammates' conversation about a party later that I miscalculated my flip and smacked my head on a bar. Ten stitches and a concussion later, I was left alone in the hospital. FML
by Anonymous / 03/14/2011 at 12:49am / United States (Texas) / Health
Today, I came back to my boyfriend's house where I've been staying to find all my things thrown outside, ruined, including my entire CD collection, textbooks and clothes cut up. All because I had left my cell phone there and had got a text from a guy saying "Hi, how have you been?" FML
Today, in an attempt to impress a girl I like, I tried to crush a soda can by hitting it with my forehead. Not only did I fail, I knocked myself out in the process. When I regained consciousness, the girl was gone and someone had taken the liberty of drawing a penis on my face. FML
by Anonymous / 03/13/2011 at 6:26pm / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was fired from the trucking company I work for, due to numerous complaints about my reckless driving. I don't even do driving work there, but my ex keeps calling in to report me, and my boss wanted the calls to stop. FML
by Anonymous / 03/12/2011 at 6:18pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Work
Today, I was at Aéropostale with some friends when I noticed a woman glaring at me. When we got to the checkout, the woman still had her eyes on me, so I asked why she was staring. She snapped, "If you had kept your legs closed, you wouldn't be pregnant." I'm not pregnant. FML
by vlcardenx3 / 03/12/2011 at 4:11pm / United States (West Virginia) / Miscellaneous
by AuraOfJustice / 03/12/2011 at 9:43am / United States / Love
by Nerrh / 03/12/2011 at 5:53am / Australia (Victoria) / Health
by mommyfairy / 03/12/2011 at 3:34am / United States / Work
Today, I was at the mall and I saw a kid crying. I asked her "What's wrong sweetie, are you lost?" She ran away screaming "Help me!" I ended up having to explain to a dumb mall cop that I'm not a perv. FML
by soul0eater / 03/12/2011 at 2:18am / Saudi Arabia (Ar Riyad) / Kids
by Username / 03/12/2011 at 12:10am / United States / Intimacy
- Today, I’m a French teacher in Ukraine, and in class we were debating gun legislation. In order to… Today, I’m a bus driver in Paris. A guy got on with a sheep. I told him that you can’t take the bus… Today, I’m on a mission in Africa. My company driver is so old, deaf and half blind that I have to…