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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Chee

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Chee
  • Town/Country : US
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 11 December 1989 (22 years)
  • Number of visits : 856
  • Number of comments : 4
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Today, I got a paper cut while opening my box of Band-Aids. FML

#4566458 (182)

I agree, your life sucks (41798) - you deserved it (6816)

On 08/16/2009 at 3:05am - health - by irony (woman) - United States (California)

Today, while having sex I realized two things. First, I can't remember the last time my boyfriend gave me an orgasm, and secondly I think the curtains slightly clash with the duvet cover. I was more annoyed with the second one. FML

#4527001 (131)

I agree, your life sucks (37298) - you deserved it (7460)

On 08/14/2009 at 2:33pm - intimacy - by vicgal - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was on the bus, when an elderly woman stepped in. She looked too weak to stand. She looked at me with her sad puppy eyes, expecting me to give up my seat for her. I felt sorry and got up. As soon as she sat down, she says, "Ha! Sucker!" She didn't look so cute anymore. FML

#4516147 (159)

I agree, your life sucks (35912) - you deserved it (5121)

On 08/14/2009 at 12:35am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I had to go to the police station to pick up my 42 year old dad. Why? He was caught stealing candy. FML

#4462410 (240)

I agree, your life sucks (1145) - you deserved it (2530)

On 08/11/2009 at 11:07pm - kids - by ahhahaha (man) - United States (New Mexico)

Today, I bought a new computer. I gave my old one to my mother. After handing it over and going home, I realised I forgot to change the background picture, a naked photo of my girlfriend. FML

#4426639 (78)

I agree, your life sucks (5853) - you deserved it (44655)

On 08/10/2009 at 12:41pm - misc - by picaboo (man) - Singapore

Today, I gave my girlfriend a small stun gun I bought for her. She mentioned how she thought it was ''cute'', though it probably wouldn't help if someone was after her. She then put the tazer to my chest. When I woke up, she told me how it was my fault, for buying it for her. FML

#4414579 (127)

I agree, your life sucks (35744) - you deserved it (9488)

On 08/09/2009 at 10:13pm - health - by Ducati (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, as a joke, my friends and I decided to put me in a dress and makeup, to creep out a friend. I'm a guy. I'm not sure which is worse, the fact that I so willingly volunteered to wear the dress and the makeup, or the fact that I thought it was comfy and made me look slim. FML

#4402387 (152)

I agree, your life sucks (8668) - you deserved it (37225)

On 08/09/2009 at 3:31am - misc - by twitch01 (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I found out that when you chase a couple of squirrels off your porch for irritating your dogs, sometimes they chase you back. FML

#4397951 (98)

I agree, your life sucks (27180) - you deserved it (10236)

On 08/09/2009 at 12:22am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, while I was walking downtown a homeless person asked me for a dollar. I thought it would be funny to wave the dollar in his face and taunt him. I guess he thought it would be funny to stab me in the leg with a pencil. FML

#4331370 (841)

I agree, your life sucks (1206) - you deserved it (286027)

On 08/06/2009 at 9:35am - misc - by who_could_it_be - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was picking my daughter up at day care. She was outside playing kick ball. A red ball rolls over to me, and trying to impress the kids, I kicked it over the slide. I turn around to see three crying six year olds. It was their hamster ball. FML

#4308181 (315)

I agree, your life sucks (22082) - you deserved it (60437)

On 08/05/2009 at 1:10pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was putting on my new pair of jeans, when my girlfriend walked in. She found the "XS" size sticker on the side of my pants, held it for a little while then put it on my crotch. She then looked at me, gave a little shrug and half-smile and walked away. FML

#4270687 (177)

I agree, your life sucks (36426) - you deserved it (5205)

On 08/04/2009 at 12:15am - love - by just_a_bit_akwRd (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I quit my job after two years. Now I have my crazy boss sitting out in front of my house, telling me she wants to work things out. She has been there all day. FML

#4255105 (96)

I agree, your life sucks (36666) - you deserved it (2570)

On 08/03/2009 at 1:16pm - work - by Azcrazy (man) - United States

Today, I texted the man I'm dating, told him I was having a terrible day and asked him to say something to cheer me up. His response? "Did you know that rabbits shriek when they're killed?" I'm still having a terrible day, and now I can't stop thinking about dying, shrieking bunnies. FML

#4188521 (165)

I agree, your life sucks (35103) - you deserved it (6732)

On 07/31/2009 at 6:46pm - love - by deadbunnies (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my friends had ditched me for a party I hadn't been invited to so I was sitting home alone. The only other thing in my house was the mosquito I nicknamed Fred. I liked to watch Fred fly around and try to suck my blood. 20 minutes later, I found Fred's dead body. I was actually sad. FML

#4158002 (205)

I agree, your life sucks (46853) - you deserved it (12767)

On 07/30/2009 at 10:43am - animals - by dumbo (man) - United States (Virginia) - moderated by the Jackass crew

Today, while spray painting a rocking horse for my kids I left the can outside in the sun. When I picked it up it was hot to the touch and I dropped it. It exploded on impact and now I am more blue than the rocking horse. FML

#4083142 (158)

I agree, your life sucks (30624) - you deserved it (14543)

On 07/27/2009 at 4:08pm - animals - by usafprog (man) - United States (Alabama)



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