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Celesta

Offline (the 08/24/2014 at 12:40pm) | Search for a member

Celesta

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3486
  • Number of comments : 89
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About Celesta : I'm a simple girl from Kuwait, very easy going. I don't expect a lot from people. Love to live life to its fullest!

Celesta's page activity

Visits<b>jazzybrar</b> - the 08/12/2014 at 5:05am<b>ex_omer</b> - the 07/30/2014 at 2:13am<b>jayeterror775</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 5:11am<b>GuyNoOneKnows</b> - the 07/06/2014 at 8:23pm<b>adamant84</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 7:44am<b>tshurtz722</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 1:34am<b>tazmanmike2013</b> - the 06/28/2014 at 8:05am<b>subhaan786</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 3:59am<b>zingline89</b> - the 06/06/2014 at 10:03am<b>Mayan80</b> - the 06/01/2014 at 5:03am<b>Shemp_5</b> - the 06/01/2014 at 1:49am<b>PAsurvivor</b> - the 05/26/2014 at 5:07pm<b>thisguy184</b> - the 05/19/2014 at 11:40pm<b>SlashingAverV2</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 5:13pm<b>HumbleExistence</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 2:59am<b>Raelthelamb</b> - the 05/04/2014 at 4:12pm<b>DMAN80182001</b> - the 04/15/2014 at 7:29am<b>cjwayy</b> - the 04/12/2014 at 1:52pm

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Celesta's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to take a dump. While looking for a book to read, I sneezed. The force of the sneeze caused me to shit my pants. The glob of dung then ran down my leg before falling out of my shorts onto my carpet, all in less than 5 seconds. Nothing in my life has prepared me for this. FML

#5828114
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (87472) - you deserved it (14621)

On 10/14/2009 at 1:01pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I had to take a dump. While looking for a book to read, I sneezed. The force of the sneeze caused me to shit my pants. The glob of dung then ran down my leg before falling out of my shorts onto my carpet, all in less than 5 seconds. Nothing in my life has prepared me for this. FML

#5828114
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (87472) - you deserved it (14621)

On 10/14/2009 at 1:01pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, after coming home from hanging out with a few friends, my mom told me that I shouldn't hang out with them any more. Why? Because "they are way hotter than I am and I'll never get a boyfriend if I'm always the ugly one in my group." FML

#5515863
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39889) - you deserved it (2951)

On 09/27/2009 at 9:39pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was trying to have sex with my boyfriend, David. I moaned his name and he whispered, "I'm not David." Then, with an Italian accent, he said, "It's-a-me! Mario!" FML

#4882481
344 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62483) - you deserved it (15869)

On 08/28/2009 at 1:11pm - intimacy - by Michelle (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, after a night of partying, I woke up in the middle of my co-ed dorm lobby to the sound of giggles. I was in a thong with $1 monopoly bills sticking out. I'm a guy. FML

#3849129
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14168) - you deserved it (46230)

On 07/18/2009 at 2:03am - misc - by joedoe (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was on my girlfriend's computer. When searching on google, her browsing history popped up. The first thing was "Best positions for a small penis." FML

#3691268
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (84019) - you deserved it (13020)

On 07/12/2009 at 12:20pm - intimacy - by wtf (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I spent 3 hours washing my hands to get the pony out of the soap bar. I'm 16. FML

#3297197
247 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11186) - you deserved it (50137)

On 06/28/2009 at 3:23am - misc - by Soapy (woman) - United States (New Mexico)

Today, while shopping in the FML store I bought the "Retro Sport Tee," I didn't notice you are supposed to put your own "FML" on the shirt. Mine says "Today, Your Text Here. FML." FML

#2459150
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22212) - you deserved it (74792)

On 05/31/2009 at 8:03am - misc - by deucelututi - United States (New York)

Today, I was getting ready for my first date with a boy I really like when my dad insisted on meeting him. My dad is super protective and a cop. He cleaned his gun in front of my date and made it clear he had to be careful with me. My date started to cry when we got to the car. FML

#2376689
374 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64715) - you deserved it (5690)

On 05/28/2009 at 4:15pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, my 6 year old daughter saw a man in a wheelchair who's leg had been amputated. She walks up to him and says, "What happened?". He answers kindly that he's a war veteran. She then responds, "Well then you deserve to get your leg blown off. You shouldn't be killing people." FML

#2030761
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (93247) - you deserved it (22301)

On 05/17/2009 at 9:19pm - kids - by embarrassedmom (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, my first graders released the butterflies we've been raising. The kids were sad that one had died in his cocoon and wouldn't be set free. Turns out that butterfly may have had a better fate: a flock of birds ate half of the others. Immediately after releasing them. In front of the kids. FML

#1454784
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65692) - you deserved it (4820)

On 04/29/2009 at 12:30pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I drove 9 hours and took Monday off of work to surprise my Mom and Dad for Easter. They weren't home so I called to tell them the surprise, rather than wait. They didn't answer as they were on a flight to Denver to surprise me for Easter since "I couldn't get off work." FML

#945655
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69330) - you deserved it (12823)

On 04/13/2009 at 6:45am - misc - by traveller (man) - United States (New Mexico)

Today, my fiancé's parents visited. I keep chickens for their eggs, and his parents own a farm, so we had a connection. They told us to leave the house while they cooked us dinner. When we returned, we faced two steaming plates of chicken. My chickens. They had names. FML

#896114
412 comments

I agree, your life sucks (220442) - you deserved it (27654)

On 04/10/2009 at 1:11am - animals - by lanbon182 - United States (California)

Today, I awoke to the sound of my dad knocking on my dorm room door for a surprise visit. He's barely outside the door and I pull the door open and say hey, when my roommate strips naked pulls the door open, kisses me on the cheek, says in an uber-gay voice, "Thanks for last night", and leaves. FML

#527227
519 comments

I agree, your life sucks (241700) - you deserved it (31684)

On 03/22/2009 at 6:38am - intimacy - by konens_dick (man) - United States (Washington)



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