Celesta

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Offline (the 11/07/2015 at 12:17am)

Celesta

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 5159
  • Number of comments : 89
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About Celesta : I'm a simple girl from Kuwait, very easy going. I don't expect a lot from people. Love to live life to its fullest!

Celesta's page activity

Visits<b>TheDarkLight</b> - the 07/21/2016 at 2:57pm<b>MitchRapp</b> - the 07/09/2016 at 8:47pm<b>bomzo</b> - the 07/06/2016 at 6:24am<b>ashby_nail</b> - the 07/03/2016 at 12:08pm<b>vincentjules</b> - the 06/15/2016 at 6:56pm<b>jbuckets_404</b> - the 06/11/2016 at 3:48am<b>wanted_2_want</b> - the 04/12/2016 at 12:42am<b>Cyrus00</b> - the 03/24/2016 at 9:02pm<b>Blizzicus</b> - the 03/22/2016 at 10:59pm<b>HoboRain</b> - the 03/04/2016 at 5:59am<b>LoneWolf2879</b> - the 02/08/2016 at 9:21am<b>karacakal2</b> - the 01/27/2016 at 4:35pm<b>hullarms</b> - the 12/12/2015 at 3:15pm<b>beeferjay</b> - the 09/01/2015 at 1:21pm<b>dbpdp</b> - the 08/04/2015 at 4:11am<b>getindoe69</b> - the 07/28/2015 at 5:59am<b>QueenOfSuppness</b> - the 06/13/2015 at 9:34am<b>SaeidPd</b> - the 05/13/2015 at 3:41pm

Fucked!<b>jondillboy</b> - the 01/04/2015 at 10:18am

Celesta's FML badges

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You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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Celesta's favorite FMLs

Today, while at the store with my mom and baby brother, a guy started to talk to me. Just as he went to give me his number, my mom handed me my brother and said, "Here's your son, your AA meeting's in an hour, let's go." FML

by Anonymous / 12/26/2012 at 1:30pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, as part of my job as a swimming instructor, I had to help a teenage boy learn how to float. This involves supporting the person's back as they try to float. His boner stood straight up. FML

by julia / 11/30/2012 at 8:02pm / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy

Today, I was handing candy to a little boy who was trick or treating by himself. He was small enough to grab the candy and run past me into my house. I've been searching my house for two hours and still can't find him. I'm afraid to go to sleep. FML

by ananymous / 10/31/2012 at 11:04pm / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, as an introduction to the history of China, I asked my APA World History class to write a 500 word essay on a historical Chinese person. Out of a class of 18, five of them were about Mulan. FML

by desperate / 10/05/2012 at 5:47am / Malta / Work

Today, as I was waiting for my girlfriend in the street, I saw a woman who looked a lot like her. I ran towards her, my arms in the air ready to give her a hug, only to realise it wasn't her. I then had to pass the woman, my arms in the air, still running. FML

by minibuch1505 / 09/21/2012 at 7:31am / Miscellaneous

Today, while I was waiting at a red light, another car slammed into me. By the time I got out to assess the damage, the other car was empty and there was nobody in sight. Either Moby Dickwad was abducted by aliens mid-crash, or he was behind on his insurance payments. FML

by Boar / 06/24/2012 at 4:51pm / United States (New Mexico) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to take my dog to the vet for him to be put to sleep. I could feel the cold, hard shaft of irony slide its way up my ass and slowly fuck me senseless with every step I took on this beautiful National Dog Day. FML

by Anonymous / 08/26/2011 at 1:49pm / United States / Animals

Today, my boyfriend proposed to me by tossing the ring at me and saying "Here, wear this." FML

by Username / 07/20/2011 at 7:07pm / United States / Love

Today, I went to an amateur baseball game with some family and friends. When our team hit a home run, my grandpa took it upon himself to start screaming wildly, removing his prosthetic leg and waving it jubilantly in the air. FML

by Username / 07/08/2011 at 9:24am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend said that to be extra careful he's been taking my birth control pills too. FML

by Anonymous / 06/27/2011 at 9:55am / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, on the bus, a delusional old man had an extremely long conversation with me, referring to me as "Leslie" and talking about "our childhood together". Not wanting to hurt his feelings I played along. At his stop he got up and grinned at me, saying "I'm kidding. I never knew a Leslie in my life. Nice rack." FML

by Anonymous / 06/26/2011 at 2:12am / United States (Indiana) / Transportation

Today, my mother set off the alarms at Walmart by shoplifting. She shouted at me to run, which I didn't. I had to get a ride home from the security guard, since my mother left without me because I didn't get to her car fast enough. FML

by Anonymous / 06/08/2011 at 10:00pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my toilet decided it wouldn't take any more shit from me, and flooded the bathroom. FML

by Anonymous / 05/22/2011 at 4:31pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my identical twin sister got in trouble for sneaking out of the house to see her boyfriend. My father decided to ground both of us, because it would be "too confusing" for him otherwise. FML

by Monika / 05/05/2011 at 5:04pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Kids

Today, I witnessed two women in a catfight, ripping clothes off each other. This would have been great if the two women weren't my mom and my grandma. FML

by Danny / 04/25/2011 at 9:07am / Miscellaneous