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About Celesta : I'm a simple girl from Kuwait, very easy going. I don't expect a lot from people. Love to live life to its fullest!
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Today, I had to take my dog to the vet for him to be put to sleep. I could feel the cold, hard shaft of irony slide its way up my ass and slowly fuck me senseless with every step I took on this beautiful National Dog Day. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23505) - you deserved it (3834)
On 08/26/2011 at 1:49pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my boyfriend proposed to me by tossing the ring at me and saying "Here, wear this." FML
I agree, your life sucks (39134) - you deserved it (5833)
On 07/20/2011 at 7:07pm - love - by Username - United States
Today, I went to an amateur baseball game with some family and friends. When our team hit a home run, my grandpa took it upon himself to start screaming wildly, removing his prosthetic leg and waving it jubilantly in the air. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22418) - you deserved it (3566)
On 07/08/2011 at 9:24am - misc - by Username - United States
Today, my boyfriend said that to be extra careful he's been taking my birth control pills too. FML
I agree, your life sucks (49339) - you deserved it (5411)
On 06/27/2011 at 9:55am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, on the bus, a delusional old man had an extremely long conversation with me, referring to me as "Leslie" and talking about "our childhood together". Not wanting to hurt his feelings I played along. At his stop he got up and grinned at me, saying "I'm kidding. I never knew a Leslie in my life. Nice rack." FML
I agree, your life sucks (13845) - you deserved it (4722)
On 06/26/2011 at 2:12am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)
Today, my mother set off the alarms at Walmart by shoplifting. She shouted at me to run, which I didn't. I had to get a ride home from the security guard, since my mother left without me because I didn't get to her car fast enough. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35829) - you deserved it (3361)
On 06/08/2011 at 10:00pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my toilet decided it wouldn't take any more shit from me, and flooded the bathroom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29356) - you deserved it (4519)
On 05/22/2011 at 4:31pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my identical twin sister got in trouble for sneaking out of the house to see her boyfriend. My father decided to ground both of us, because it would be "too confusing" for him otherwise. FML
I agree, your life sucks (49594) - you deserved it (3480)
On 05/05/2011 at 5:04pm - kids - by Monika (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I witnessed two women in a catfight, ripping clothes off each other. This would have been great if the two women weren't my mom and my grandma. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32018) - you deserved it (2921)
On 04/25/2011 at 9:07am - misc - by Danny -
Today, I was on the train to work. I was up late the night before, causing me to doze off. When I woke up, I was at my station. I stood up, went to walk out of the door and fell flat on my face on a platform full of people. Someone had tied my shoelaces together. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21321) - you deserved it (4717)
On 04/22/2011 at 6:50am - work - by anonymous -
Today, feeling social, I went to a bar. During a trip to the dimly lit restroom, I fixed my makeup, and carefully penciling my sparse eyebrows. After an evening of meeting new people, I went home. In my well-lighted restroom, I discovered that my eyebrow pencil was actually my bright red lip liner. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14033) - you deserved it (20293)
On 04/09/2011 at 3:52am - misc - by 2classicNot2 (woman) - United States (Hawaii)
TODAY, I PRESSED CAPS LOCK ON MY LAPTOP AND THE KEY GOT STUCK. NOW ALL OF MY LETTERS ARE IN CAPITAL LETTERS. I HAVE TRIED EVERYTHING. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27626) - you deserved it (23805)
On 03/21/2011 at 1:32pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Wiltshire)
Today, I emailed my potential boss a copy of my résumé. However, I didn't realize until too late that it was my fake resume, created for an English class project. Some of my former jobs included being a certified gangster, as well as the former president of Canada. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11973) - you deserved it (34849)
On 03/16/2011 at 9:01am - work - by Almostfunny (man) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, after some passionate love making with my husband, I accidentally farted on his leg. He shrieked and frantically began shaking his leg while screaming, "Get it off! Get it off!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (14681) - you deserved it (22487)
On 02/22/2011 at 4:02pm - intimacy - by CutieBooty (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, my 400 pound roommate brought home a 400 pound guy. Now there's 800 pounds of sex going on in the next room, and it sounds like the invasion of Normandy in there. FML
I agree, your life sucks (56391) - you deserved it (4915)
On 02/04/2011 at 12:42am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)
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