Canuck13

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Offline (the 01/05/2016 at 9:42pm)

Canuck13

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 5907
  • Number of comments : 57
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About Canuck13 : Meh....

Canuck13's page activity

Visits<b>potatopolice1025</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 1:55pm<b>pizzaturless</b> - the 12/22/2014 at 12:33am<b>katherhinooo</b> - the 08/05/2014 at 3:12pm<b>ispeakspanish</b> - the 05/18/2014 at 4:52pm<b>crimsonlover4</b> - the 01/30/2014 at 2:42am<b>JAL10960</b> - the 12/17/2013 at 9:56pm<b>Thursdayxo</b> - the 10/19/2013 at 2:20pm<b>thenick_m</b> - the 10/19/2013 at 12:09am<b>stl_88</b> - the 07/22/2013 at 10:49pm<b>JoeTheBow</b> - the 06/01/2013 at 5:41pm<b>Doritozilla</b> - the 05/20/2013 at 12:54am<b>niryl</b> - the 05/05/2013 at 2:17pm<b>elopezs323</b> - the 04/10/2013 at 2:20pm<b>keepkeep</b> - the 02/06/2013 at 9:36pm<b>zooobes</b> - the 01/21/2013 at 1:14pm<b>5t3ff1k4h</b> - the 12/27/2012 at 11:54pm<b>sinking_fish</b> - the 01/05/2012 at 3:23pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 10:50pm

Fucked!<b>potatopolice1025</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 7:55pm

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Canuck13's favorite FMLs

Today, I finally got to conduct my first questioning of a suspect, who had been arrested in connection with a car theft. As I recited the Miranda warning to him, my mind went totally blank, and after a few seconds, he sarcastically continued the speech for me. FML

by Anonymous / 01/17/2013 at 12:15pm / United States (Minnesota) / Work

Today, I came home to find my girlfriend crying. Concerned, I quickly asked her what was wrong. She told me tearfully that she couldn't understand why her pet lizards hadn’t grown into dinosaurs yet, and that pet store had cheated her. I’m still concerned now, but for entirely different reasons. FML

Today, my grandfather asked me why the broccoli I served for dinner was white. I told him it was cauliflower. He would't believe me, accused me of being a Russian spy, and stormed out. FML

by veggieluver / 01/15/2013 at 7:58pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I opened the door to go out for groceries. Lying on my doorstep was a pile of poop. A piece of paper was taped to the ground beside it that read, "Do it again and you'll get more than dog shit." I don't have the slightest clue who I pissed off, or how. FML

by fucking mafia or what?? / 01/12/2013 at 5:02pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, I spontaneously poured my heart out for my boyfriend, telling him how much I love and adore him. He answered by leaning in close, saying "Jolly good" in an affected accent, and burping loud and clear in my ear. FML

by Anonymous / 01/12/2013 at 3:12pm / United Kingdom (Bristol, City of) / Love

Today, my 17 year old boyfriend's mother bought him a giraffe onesie. He refused to take it off and insisted on wearing it everywhere we go. We live in Australia and it's our summer now. So far he has passed out 3 times in public because he over heated, but he still won't take it off. FML

by GiraffeLover / 01/11/2013 at 6:36am / Australia / Love

Today, my 14-year-old son showed me a "bird's egg" he was looking after in his room. It was a dried up dog turd. FML

by Facepalmum / 01/10/2013 at 1:28am / Australia (Victoria) / Kids

Today, my husband and I found the perfect house, in our price range and everything we wanted in a house. However, the street it's on is called "Arbour Butte Road". My husband refuses to buy it because he doesn't want it to sound like he lives "in a tree's ass." I'm married to an idiot. FML

by it's just a name / 01/10/2013 at 12:53am / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous

Today, I tried to get my boyfriend to roll over while he was asleep. He snores loud enough to wake the neighbors and if he lays on his side he usually stops. Instead of rolling over, he stuck his leg in the air, farted twice, and laughed about it in his sleep. He's still snoring. FML

by no sleep for me / 01/08/2013 at 2:44am / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up after sleeping with my boyfriend for the first time. I rolled over and smiled at him, and the first thing he said was, "You farted. A lot." FML

by gassy / 01/07/2013 at 10:40am / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, my girlfriend and I decided to try a new place to eat. On our way home we both had upset stomachs. As we raced into the house we realized neither of us could hold it any longer. Having only one bathroom, I let her go first. She exploded on the toilet and I exploded in my pants. FML

by shattysituation / 12/31/2012 at 5:36pm / United States / Work

Today, while helping out at a retirement home, I had to get a book off a bookshelf. When I reached up, my watch got stuck on my shirt, resulting in my shirt lifting up. I just flashed my man-boobs to at least 20 senior citizens, and one of them even asked if he could have a feel. FML

by Anonymous / 12/31/2012 at 2:58am / United States / Work

Today, at a restaurant, I happily watched as my boyfriend of three years got down on his knees and proposed to me. Before I could say yes and hug him, a girl flung herself at him, kissed him and shouted, "Yes!" With us still highly confused, she then ran away. FML

by Anonymous / 12/30/2012 at 1:29am / Canada (Alberta) / Love

Today, I'm sharing a hotel room with co-workers on a business trip. The walls are paper-thin, you could hear a pin drop, and I'm trying to make my explosive diarrhea as close to silent as possible. FML

by avoid the sour cream / 12/30/2012 at 1:14am / United States / Work

Today, I had to watch my drunk girlfriend yell at a cat for not having periods. The worst part is that she was at a pet store. The pet store at which I work. FML

by Wtf is wrong with her / 12/30/2012 at 12:20am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous