Canuck13

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Offline (the 01/05/2016 at 9:42pm)

Canuck13

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 5908
  • Number of comments : 57
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About Canuck13 : Meh....

Canuck13's page activity

Visits<b>potatopolice1025</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 1:55pm<b>pizzaturless</b> - the 12/22/2014 at 12:33am<b>katherhinooo</b> - the 08/05/2014 at 3:12pm<b>ispeakspanish</b> - the 05/18/2014 at 4:52pm<b>crimsonlover4</b> - the 01/30/2014 at 2:42am<b>JAL10960</b> - the 12/17/2013 at 9:56pm<b>Thursdayxo</b> - the 10/19/2013 at 2:20pm<b>thenick_m</b> - the 10/19/2013 at 12:09am<b>stl_88</b> - the 07/22/2013 at 10:49pm<b>JoeTheBow</b> - the 06/01/2013 at 5:41pm<b>Doritozilla</b> - the 05/20/2013 at 12:54am<b>niryl</b> - the 05/05/2013 at 2:17pm<b>elopezs323</b> - the 04/10/2013 at 2:20pm<b>keepkeep</b> - the 02/06/2013 at 9:36pm<b>zooobes</b> - the 01/21/2013 at 1:14pm<b>5t3ff1k4h</b> - the 12/27/2012 at 11:54pm<b>sinking_fish</b> - the 01/05/2012 at 3:23pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 10:50pm

Fucked!<b>potatopolice1025</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 7:55pm

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50 favourites

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Canuck13's favorite FMLs

Today, my grandmother made a rule that every time we take a crap, she has to examine the turds to make sure they aren't big enough to clog up the pipes. I don't know what's worse: that she looks at my turds, or the fact that she actively comments on them. FML

by Anonymous / 06/22/2013 at 1:01am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was using a public toilet, when someone in the next stall reached under, grabbed at my low-hanging toilet paper and pulled at it at an insane speed, whispering some kind of weird chant. Then he suddenly stopped, screamed, and ran out. What the hell happened in there? FML

by Anonymous / 06/13/2013 at 12:01pm / United States (Minnesota) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found my husband farting on my pillows, bare ass. His only words were, "This isn't what it looks like." FML

by Thanks Honey / 06/05/2013 at 11:08am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I took a dump in the woods at a secluded lake. I used the leaves of a seemingly harmless tree to clean myself. However, I was unaware that the leaf was poisonous. It feels like a thousand hornets are attacking my ass-crack. FML

by poisonivyretard / 06/04/2013 at 1:15pm / United States (Rhode Island) / Health

Today, during a series of violent sneezes due to a cold, I bit my tongue. My tongue is now so swollen I cannot close my mouth and am drooling profusely. I have to get ready to go to my job as a cashier. FML

by samaram / 06/04/2013 at 2:47am / United States / Health

Today, I woke up in bed with a one-night stand. We got really drunk the night before so I went to make a hangover-cure breakfast. Apparently he was so drunk that he didn't remember me, and when he came to the kitchen, he knocked me out with a pan and called the cops. FML

by paulinapo / 05/29/2013 at 9:53pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I fainted. Instead of stopping to help, some guy stopped to draw a penis on my forehead. The EMT laughed. FML

by Anonymous / 05/29/2013 at 11:21am / United States / Health

Today, I was sending intimate pictures to my girlfriend and accidentally sent one to my best friend. He sent me one back. FML

by Abrams52 / 05/28/2013 at 1:44am / United States (Indiana) / Intimacy

Today, while at the movies, I had an uncomfortable amount of gas that I couldn't hold in any longer. I waited for a loud part in the movie to conceal it and took my chance. Problem was, the loud part ended abruptly. I didn't. FML

Today, I got to take my 10-year-old son to the junior high school at which I teach. When my students questioned him about what I was like at home, he told the entire class: "Well, she farts all the time." FML

by Laurel / 05/25/2013 at 12:37am / Canada (Ontario) / Kids

Today, the extremely uncooperative client whom I'm trying to defend in court sent me a letter in which he threatened to sue me, because charging him for my services supposedly violates his "constipational rights". FML

by harrington61 / 05/19/2013 at 5:27pm / United States (Texas) / Work

Today, I was babysitting a 4-year-old, and we decided to play a game of hide and seek. Before he started to count, he looked me straight in the eyes and said that if I hid in his spot, he'd murder me with a knife when he grows up. I have to babysit this kid for the rest of the summer. FML

by sumhub94 / 05/14/2013 at 12:48pm / United States / Work

Today, my wife shaved her pubic hair so that it resembles Hitler's mustache. She won't stop referring to it as "the Clitler". FML

by Anonymous / 05/02/2013 at 8:50pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I'm on holiday in Ghana. After having worn an anklet I bought here for the past two weeks, I was told that it's used by the local prostitutes to advertise their trade. FML

by Anonymous / 05/02/2013 at 3:59pm / Ghana (Greater Accra) / Holidays

Today, I had to go to the emergency room with my sister, due to involuntary muscle spasms she was having. They gave her a muscle relaxer which caused her to be extremely tired and loopy. She decided to start singing loudly with a song she made up about butt fucking. FML

by seekerglow176 / 04/27/2013 at 8:42am / United States (Massachusetts) / Health