Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Canuck13

Search for a member

Canuck13

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3668
  • Number of comments : 57
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About Canuck13 : Meh....

Canuck13's page activity

Visits<b>katherhinooo</b> - the 08/05/2014 at 3:12pm<b>ispeakspanish</b> - the 05/18/2014 at 4:52pm<b>crimsonlover4</b> - the 01/30/2014 at 2:42am<b>JAL10960</b> - the 12/17/2013 at 9:56pm<b>Thursdayxo</b> - the 10/19/2013 at 2:20pm<b>thenick_m</b> - the 10/19/2013 at 12:09am<b>stl_88</b> - the 07/22/2013 at 10:49pm<b>JoeTheBow</b> - the 06/01/2013 at 5:41pm<b>Doritozilla</b> - the 05/20/2013 at 12:54am<b>niryl</b> - the 05/05/2013 at 2:17pm<b>elopezs323</b> - the 04/10/2013 at 2:20pm<b>keepkeep</b> - the 02/06/2013 at 9:36pm<b>zooobes</b> - the 01/21/2013 at 1:14pm<b>5t3ff1k4h</b> - the 12/27/2012 at 11:54pm<b>sinking_fish</b> - the 01/05/2012 at 3:23pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 10:50pm<b>Bliitz1</b> - the 12/14/2010 at 8:59am<b>grosjean</b> - the 12/14/2010 at 7:51am

Canuck13's FML badges

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

See all of Canuck13's badges

Canuck13's favorite FMLs

Today, I was at my new boyfriend's house, and he was taking a shower. I had to take a crap real bad, but his apartment only has the one bathroom. I couldn't wait for him to finish, and ended having to shit in a plastic bag. FML

#21044466
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48995) - you deserved it (21571)

On 01/29/2014 at 7:52pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was in a market in France, and went to ask the seller for some potatoes. I speak fluent French, but I got flustered and instead of saying "pomme de terre", which is the French for potato, I said "pomme de merde". I literally asked for an "apple of shit". FML

Today, I realized that if you are dreaming that you have diarrhea, you probably have diarrhea. FML

#21030771
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43468) - you deserved it (4000)

On 01/17/2014 at 11:24am - health - by crap - United States (Ohio)

Today, it's been two weeks since my parents went crazy with their attempts to save on the water bill. Every time I want to take a shower, I have to ask them first. Let's just say I've had to resort to taking sponge baths in public bathrooms to keep my B.O. under control. FML

#21025608
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47901) - you deserved it (4085)

On 01/12/2014 at 2:06pm - misc - by shakinmahbuttbutt (man) - United States

Today, I was at work alone with a stomach bug. For some reason, our bathroom was out of toilet paper, so I had to quickly run to the nearest store to buy more, only to shit my pants midway there. I'm pretty sure the cashier knew exactly what had happened. FML

#21011588
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38390) - you deserved it (3737)

On 12/31/2013 at 1:22pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Alabama)

Today, for my 18th birthday my mum gave me a black lace thong. I'm a guy. FML

#20992659
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38461) - you deserved it (3682)

On 12/14/2013 at 7:48pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada

Today, I farted so loud that I woke myself up. And the stranger sitting next to me on the airplane. FML

#20988758
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41783) - you deserved it (6890)

On 12/11/2013 at 8:14am - misc - by pootie (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I went with my boyfriend to meet his parents. I had to excuse myself to use the bathroom, and I ended up taking a huge crap that wouldn't flush. I had to reach in and break it up with my hands just so it would flush. Only after I washed up did I notice a plunger sitting under the sink. FML

#20959868
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22699) - you deserved it (43818)

On 11/16/2013 at 2:31pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Sent from mobile version

Today, my best friend went in for her scheduled mammogram, and I sent her a text saying, "How're your boobies?" It was only after I sent it that I realized I'd sent it to my history professor. FML

#20930198
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38754) - you deserved it (11511)

On 10/22/2013 at 12:47pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was mugged in a public bathroom. All I had on me was a plastic sheriff's badge, so I gave it to them. They laughed me out of the restroom. FML

#20928153
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35253) - you deserved it (3572)

On 10/20/2013 at 10:16pm - misc - by the_lameo_geek (woman) - United States (New Mexico)

Today, a few of my friends arranged for us to go skinny-dipping with the guy I really like. It went really well, until a turd surfaced before our eyes. After we scrambled out of the pool in panic, my crush called us all freaks and left. FML

#20927673
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40780) - you deserved it (5486)

On 10/20/2013 at 3:56pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I smelled chicken nuggets and asked my boyfriend if he was making some. He wasn't. It was my armpits. FML

#20902037
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21730) - you deserved it (38777)

On 09/30/2013 at 3:02pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, it's my birthday. I don't mind crappy gifts, but I have to wonder why the hell my boyfriend bought me a home enema kit. FML

#20890231
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38371) - you deserved it (3710)

On 09/21/2013 at 2:10pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my grandmother opened the bathroom door to find me eating a spoonful of Nutella while on the toilet. She is convinced that I was eating my own shit and will not stop telling everybody. They believe her. FML

#20882660
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26766) - you deserved it (39179)

On 09/15/2013 at 5:16pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, at my boyfriend's brother's house, I desperately needed to poop. After finishing my business, I realized the toilet wouldn't flush. I had to pull my poop out, wrap it in TP and make an excuse to go outside to throw it in a bush. The neighbor was watching. FML

#20874714
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41147) - you deserved it (11043)

On 09/09/2013 at 6:05pm - misc - by heyhijello - United States (California)



FML's blog

  • K'Naye's illustrated FML
  • Woohoo it's the weekend! Winter is all around some of us, but not in our hearts. To help fight off the cold and seasonal depression, this week we're taking a look at love and tenderness. It's what keeps…

Friday 21 November 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: