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Offline (the 06/06/2015 at 12:40am) | Search for a member



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 24 April 1995 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3737
  • Number of comments : 49
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About BurningGrannies : I do things sometimes

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I never take things to heart

Having said that, my 3 comments on that FML were really worth it.


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BurningGrannies's favorite FMLs

Today, during lunch at school, a wave of nausea came over me. I ran to the bathroom and made it just in time. As I was throwing up, I set off the toilet's automatic flush and my vomit came flying back into my face. FML


I agree, your life sucks (67698) - you deserved it (5011)

On 05/02/2009 at 1:05pm - health - by sicktomystomach (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my mom had big news. I've been trying to get her to quit smoking because of second hand smoke for 20 years. She learned today that second hand smoke severely affects animals as well. Her big news? She's quitting. She doesn't want to hurt the dog. FML


I agree, your life sucks (64456) - you deserved it (3537)

On 04/24/2009 at 6:23pm - health - by whatthehell (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I spotted one of my friends using the ATM outside our school's university center. I crept up behind him, grabbed his shoulders abruptly, and shouted in my best deep man-voice, "Give me all your money!" Turned out to be a poor, unsuspecting freshman. He gave me his money. FML


I agree, your life sucks (12782) - you deserved it (71361)

On 04/22/2009 at 10:22pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I tried to sneak up on my girlfriend who was sitting in her car with one of her girlfriends. I snuck up to the driver's side window and tried to startle her by banging on the window. The window was down. My thumb went right in her eye. She has to wear a patch for 2 weeks. FML


I agree, your life sucks (15039) - you deserved it (66612)

On 04/16/2009 at 2:43pm - misc - by shiftybizniss - Canada (Ontario)

Today, on the train, I got excited when I suddenly noticed I had a missed call and voicemail from a boy I liked. With a grin on my face, I told my friend. My dad overheard and said, "oh sweetie, he probably had the wrong number." The voicemail was blank. I texted him. The call was an accident. FML


I agree, your life sucks (52908) - you deserved it (4185)

On 04/08/2009 at 10:35pm - misc - by lyssanthamum - United States (New York)

Today, I met a guy online. We talked all night long and hit it off amazingly. He told me he'd never felt that way about anyone else, and I agreed. He sent me a picture and he was gorgeous. I sent him one after he assured me he didn't care what I looked like. I haven't heard from him since. FML


I agree, your life sucks (71596) - you deserved it (12053)

On 04/08/2009 at 3:19am - love - by DL06 (woman) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I went to the doctor because my arm hurt. When he told me I had tennis elbow I said "that's funny I don't play tennis". Then he asked me if I had a girlfriend. When I said no he said "Well I guess we solved this one." FML


I agree, your life sucks (75754) - you deserved it (19840)

On 04/04/2009 at 12:34am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I fell asleep in class. As a joke, my professor used an airhorn to wake me up. I got so freaked out that I punched the girl next to me in the face. She got knocked out. FML


I agree, your life sucks (90050) - you deserved it (33554)

On 03/23/2009 at 3:06pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I had a meeting with my super-hot TA. When I got to her office, she complimented me for being early, to which I thoughtfully replied "oh I usually come early." She laughed. FML


I agree, your life sucks (55936) - you deserved it (32982)

On 03/16/2009 at 1:40pm - misc - by SmoothTalker (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I was writing an email to our entire company regarding a fundraiser we are taking part in for children and adults with disabilities. I was rushing to get the email out and hit send before I realized that instead of "Best Regards" I had typed "Best Retards" as the closing line. FML


I agree, your life sucks (28991) - you deserved it (39650)

On 03/06/2009 at 1:53pm - work - by Can't Spell Worth A Damn (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I went bowling with my mom and she paid for 2 games. By the 6th frame of game 1 she was bored and to get her money back for both games she told the employees I shit my pants. I'm 17. FML


I agree, your life sucks (56502) - you deserved it (3551)

On 02/19/2009 at 4:47pm - money - by Noname (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, while copying some stuff for school, I felt someone rubbing her boobs against my back. I got a boner and when I looked to see who the hot chick was, I saw my fat friend rubbing his man boobs against my back. FML


I agree, your life sucks (28067) - you deserved it (53924)

On 02/12/2009 at 11:17am - intimacy - by florisvanlent (man) - Netherlands (Drenthe)

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