Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

BntyHntrSeattle

Offline (3 hours ago) | Search for a member

BntyHntrSeattle

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4082
  • Number of comments : 532
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 84 posted

About BntyHntrSeattle : I play piano. That's me :)

BntyHntrSeattle's page activity

Visits<b>A_Dead_Fish32</b> - the 08/11/2014 at 1:02pm<b>calvo_07</b> - the 08/08/2014 at 3:25pm<b>WiltedRoses</b> - the 08/08/2014 at 12:52am<b>potatozzzzz</b> - the 08/07/2014 at 11:06pm<b>SirAnon</b> - the 08/07/2014 at 10:44pm<b>phew</b> - the 08/07/2014 at 4:45pm<b>toomanyidiots</b> - the 08/07/2014 at 2:27pm<b>JustinKirby</b> - the 08/07/2014 at 1:18pm<b>Lebeaugars95</b> - the 08/07/2014 at 11:56am<b>GreatGeak</b> - the 08/07/2014 at 10:32am<b>echosong</b> - the 08/06/2014 at 10:26pm<b>Garrett2818</b> - the 08/06/2014 at 2:00pm<b>divaballerina</b> - the 08/04/2014 at 2:35am<b>Kyuzomi</b> - the 07/29/2014 at 2:07pm<b>abombination</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 3:27am<b>gjikvtj</b> - the 07/06/2014 at 1:36pm<b>Tommypun</b> - the 06/26/2014 at 3:15am<b>sienna1</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 11:01pm

BntyHntrSeattle's FML badges

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

Back from a party

An FML submitted on a Saturday morning between 5 and 6am can't be a good FML.

See all of BntyHntrSeattle's badges

BntyHntrSeattle's favorite FMLs

Today, I wrote the girl I love a long, gushy letter to convince her to be with me instead of her abusive ex. Later on, I asked her what she thought. She said she can't read cursive. She chose the ex. FML

#20046039
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22219) - you deserved it (3705)

On 08/28/2012 at 10:16am - love - by tutusaurus - United States (California)

Today, I walked in on my fifteen-year-old son and his friends attempting to set up a rudimentary meth lab in his bedroom. I'm not sure whether to be angrier that they simply tried this, or that they thought burning up baking soda would somehow produce methamphetamine. FML

#20017485
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23807) - you deserved it (2381)

On 08/12/2012 at 8:49pm - kids - by JAdams (man) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, at work, I was forced to nod and smile as a pregnant, fifteen-year-old, brain-dead Jersey Shore wannabe cussed me out for being rude by using words from a "foreign language" during our conversation. I used the word "pretentious." FML

#20015372
313 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32921) - you deserved it (2021)

On 08/11/2012 at 3:37pm - work - by mikeissad (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, while watching the Olympics, my father found it completely necessary to make a farting sound every single time an athlete jumps or bends over. This will be a very long few weeks. FML

#19995451
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18797) - you deserved it (1944)

On 07/31/2012 at 10:49pm - misc - by joleezad5 - United States (Missouri)

Today, while getting ready to go to bed, I told my boyfriend that I feel depressed due to the lack of intimacy in our relationship. His response was to roll over, fall asleep, and send a deadly fart my way. FML

#19990004
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21671) - you deserved it (3262)

On 07/29/2012 at 12:25am - love - by Anonymous - Denmark (Sjelland)

Today, I had to turn down an offer of what seemed like some sexy time with a cute girl because my intestines were bursting with an intense desire to unleash molten lava. I rushed home to squat down, only to let out a disappointingly small piece of crud and a tiny fart. FML

#19984638
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27913) - you deserved it (5150)

On 07/26/2012 at 1:39am - intimacy - by Jarman (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, at work in a nursing home, I had to kill imaginary dogs in the lunch room, because they were evil and trying to eat everyone. This started with just one person seeing them, to all 30 of them screaming and freaking out. I spent 45 minutes killing imaginary dogs. FML

#19983789
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26890) - you deserved it (2082)

On 07/25/2012 at 5:05pm - work - by justlittleoldme - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I returned home to my parents' house, drunk. Hungry, I grabbed a slice of bread and some butter and took two mouthfuls. Five hours later, my mother woke me up and dragged me to the kitchen. In the middle of the table was a buttered, half-eaten sponge. FML

#19959363
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10687) - you deserved it (36778)

On 07/19/2012 at 2:55pm - misc - by Bontempi (man) - France

Today, my power finally came back on. I excitedly went and spent $100 to refill my fridge, only to come back home and discover the power is out again, and might not be back on for another three days. FML

Today, I went to an orchestra concert. Halfway through the performance I had to fart really bad, so I decided to try and sneak it in while the orchestra was playing a loud exciting part. Just as I let it rip, there was a dramatic pause in the music. Everyone heard. FML

#19917515
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13104) - you deserved it (24602)

On 07/10/2012 at 12:44am - misc - by Concert Flatulent - United States (Texas)

Today, as I was getting ready to go to the midnight premiere of the new Spiderman movie, I was actually bitten by a spider. He gets super powers and a hot girl, I swell up like a balloon and get to spend the night in the hospital. FML

#19884595
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26200) - you deserved it (2087)

On 07/03/2012 at 4:03am - misc - by spiderfail - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was T-boned at an intersection. In an ambulance. On the way to the hospital after being T-boned at an intersection. FML

#19873048
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36049) - you deserved it (1640)

On 06/30/2012 at 8:31pm - health - by Anonymous (man) -

Today, I have four flights. I spent last night projectile vomiting with food poisoning. By the time I got to the airport it had progressed to liquid diarhea. Two flights in, I got my period. FML

#19870672
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49659) - you deserved it (2267)

On 06/30/2012 at 8:48am - health - by Jobby (woman) -

Today, I tried for 45 minutes to convince my psychiatrist to take me off my antidepressant. When he finally agreed to do so, I broke down into tears and sobbed uncontrollably for 10 minutes. Hello, increased prescription. FML

#19854055
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13765) - you deserved it (18501)

On 06/27/2012 at 1:29am - health - by purpleskylight - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I confessed my feelings to the girl I've been in love with for three years. Her response was to well up, start crying, and ask me why I had to have chosen her. FML

#19850692
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24824) - you deserved it (2378)

On 06/26/2012 at 1:18pm - love - by Oraashi (man) - United Kingdom (Stoke-on-Trent)



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #2: In slow-moving hell
  • It was once a dream, now it’s come true. We’re at the place that was allocated months ago for preprogrammed, enforced holiday fun time. We’ve put on some cargo shorts, slipped on some of those…

Wednesday 13 August 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: