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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, after suffering with bad constipation and having to eat special bread to get me to go, I have practically just pooped out a week's worth of food in 15 minutes, and I'm still going. I've passed the ring of fire stage, now I just can't feel my asshole. FML
I agree, your life sucks (178) - you deserved it (2754)
On 02/27/2012 at 10:55am - health - by awhmaaan - United Kingdom
Today, while skiing, the creepy guy controlling the chair lift said I was pretty. I was so caught off guard that I fell off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14213) - you deserved it (4011)
On 02/26/2012 at 11:58pm - misc - by Confused - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, Target asked me if I would do the closing announcement. I've only been working there a little while, so excited I agreed. I told people, "The store is now closing, thank you for shopping at Walmart." FML
I agree, your life sucks (12871) - you deserved it (24644)
On 02/15/2012 at 9:03pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)
Today, I started speaking gibberish in the middle of the conversation with my mom to see if she would notice. She didn't. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19268) - you deserved it (2273)
On 02/15/2012 at 8:54pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I wanted to freshen up my room, so I bought some Febreze. Standing on my bed, I began to spray, not noticing that the air vent directly across was turned on. The spray came directly back at me. The doctor says that the irritation in my eyes may last for several days. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8054) - you deserved it (13947)
On 02/15/2012 at 9:18am - health - by prettysmellingbedroom - United States
Today, my misanthropic malcontent of a son smashed my air freshener and turned my faulty lava lamp on in a twisted act of rebellion. The bottom of the lamp broke and got wax everywhere. My room now smells like cinnamon, with a hint of freshly embalmed corpse. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16432) - you deserved it (3626)
Today, my friend's kid chased me with a rusty, sharp tent peg and threatened to kill me. When I finally got him to calm down he ran off to his room. Later, I found the tent peg under his pillow with a note that said my name. My friend thinks it's hilarious. I am staying here for a week. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21421) - you deserved it (1436)
On 02/11/2012 at 8:41am - kids - by FuckLife (woman) - Australia (Queensland)
Today, I had to pee in the kitchen sink because my bathroom is being completely revamped, and the only other toilet in the house is my parents'. They refuse to let anyone use it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19413) - you deserved it (1750)
On 02/09/2012 at 1:42am - misc - by Falcon - United States (Arizona)
Today, I had a technical skill test as a nurse. My objective was to help the patient defecate, but my opening sentence came out as: "Hello, I'm Jan. I'm here to help you take a shit." FML
I agree, your life sucks (15720) - you deserved it (7032)
On 02/08/2012 at 10:24pm - work - by Silver_Samurai (man) - Netherlands
Today, I walked into the house only to be greeted by the strongest smell of dung. I asked my mom about it, and it turns out she's been airing these strange herbs throughout the house, most of which are in my bedroom. She won't let me open the window. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13910) - you deserved it (1140)
On 02/07/2012 at 1:38am - misc - by whyme (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I was dumped. My boyfriend was too afraid to break up with me, so he sent the girl he cheated on me with. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28108) - you deserved it (1722)
On 02/06/2012 at 8:23pm - love - by Nanabanana1 (woman) - United States
Today, I was dumped. My boyfriend was too afraid to break up with me, so he sent the girl he cheated on me with. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28108) - you deserved it (1722)
On 02/06/2012 at 8:23pm - love - by Nanabanana1 (woman) - United States
Today, my boyfriend confessed to me that he purposely makes me angry, because when I'm angry, I clean, and it saves him having to do it himself. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23217) - you deserved it (4293)
On 02/02/2012 at 3:56pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Reading)
Today, I got a parking ticket for parking in my neighbors' parking spot. I parked there because my neighbors were parked in my parking spot. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23006) - you deserved it (1473)
On 02/02/2012 at 5:28am - money - by carssuck - United States
Today, I tried to treat a cut on my butt hole with Neosporin. I couldn't see it properly, so I had to use the front-facing camera on my phone. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14428) - you deserved it (4515)
On 02/01/2012 at 11:57pm - health - by 11niko (man) - United States (Washington)
Monday 17 June 2013
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