About BananaBeak : An 18 year old overgrown child from England, the land of wizards. My life consists of drinking, reading and watching 'Doctor Who' obsessively.
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BananaBeak's favorite FMLs
by poorkids / 10/31/2012 at 1:01am / United States (Washington) / Kids
Today, we got new seats in class today. The guy placed next to me, turned, looked me dead in the eye, and said, "The balls are the warmest place on the body" while his hands were in his pants. I'm stuck next to him for the rest of the semester. FML
by Anonymous / 10/30/2012 at 8:29pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous
by Andrew / 10/30/2012 at 2:08am / United States (Washington) / Love
by CutestBoysEver / 10/29/2012 at 9:30pm / United States (Colorado) / Kids
by SadExperiment / 10/29/2012 at 8:42pm / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, I broke a nail at school. The edge kept getting caught on things, so I thought I could file it down by rubbing it on my jeans. Apparently it looked like I was doing something else, because I was called into the principal's office to discuss why "certain things" should be done in private. FML
by Anonymous / 10/29/2012 at 8:39pm / United States / Intimacy
Today, while in a pharmacy, I walked over to the shaving cream aisle. I picked up a can to smell it and unknowingly pushed the button, spraying an old guy in front of me. He freaked out and started telling everyone that the ceiling above him was leaking. FML
by IndianAngel96 / 10/29/2012 at 6:39pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
by Indianagirl94 / 10/29/2012 at 6:22pm / United States / Love
by StormSeason / 10/29/2012 at 8:03am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 10/29/2012 at 6:32am / United States (Texas) / Kids
Today, over a family dinner, my husband and I told everyone that I'm pregnant. My father frowned and said, "Again?", my 9-year-old daughter started crying, and her brother smirked and yelled, "Up the ass, no babies!" FML
by Anonymous / 10/28/2012 at 12:44pm / United States / Kids
by friedbutter / 10/28/2012 at 10:53am / Canada (Ontario) / Kids
Today, my coworker and I were sitting and eating lunch. We noticed a little kid kept staring at us, and every time we looked away he would come a little bit closer. When he was right behind us, I looked and was startled enough to jump. The parents were three tables down laughing uncontrollably. FML
by radioinvader / 10/28/2012 at 8:29am / Canada (Ontario) / Work
by Anonymous / 10/28/2012 at 6:43am / United States / Miscellaneous
by prettylady? / 10/28/2012 at 12:22am / United States / Love
- 1Today, after two weeks of trying to convince my parents to go to my high school graduation. They… 2Today, my neighbor's 4-year-old daughter came up to me and asked if she could have my dog. When I… 3Today, my flatmate came home from a date with the same guy that I have been in love with since high…
- Today, like every other day, I woke up and made myself a cup of coffee using my French press. After… Today, I walked into a restaurant and caught my Dad having lunch with his other daughter. Not only… Today, my parents had a family discussion about my sister's birthday plans because it was the "next…