About B5B0N35 : HI random person my name is Leo. message me if you want I also have a kik if you wana talk ask for It
I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
100 kick ass comments
100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!
I agree, their lives suck
200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.
Today, I finally got the girl of my dreams to come over for a movie. When I answered the door, my little brother ran up behind me, yelled "geronimo" and pulled down my pants and underwear. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22393) - you deserved it (2010)
On 05/13/2012 at 8:15am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I was petting my cat and I jokingly said out loud, "Oh, the pussy likes it rough? You like that, don't you?" My windows were open and I could hear the neighbors laughing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6737) - you deserved it (18209)
On 05/03/2012 at 8:39pm - intimacy - by anonymous4991 (woman) - United States (Colorado)
Today, I found out that I can get my girlfriend to make more sex noises by massaging her back than I can by actually having sex with her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16601) - you deserved it (5785)
On 04/16/2012 at 9:59pm - intimacy - by anonymous - United Kingdom (London, City of)
Today, my boyfriend got really excited that he'd broken his own record; he can now last a full 2 minutes in bed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22171) - you deserved it (2430)
On 03/25/2012 at 11:05pm - intimacy - by user210 (woman) - United States
Today, as I was walking my dog, two cute girls from my school were walking towards me on the sidewalk. I thought it would be appropriate to wave and give a smile. My dog thought it would be appropriate to viciously bark at and mount one of the girls. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18634) - you deserved it (2497)
On 03/25/2012 at 7:59am - animals - by PicklesMcRaptor - United States (Florida)
Today, I told my daughter that she should put some love into her cooking. She started kissing the ingredients. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14128) - you deserved it (10531)
On 03/19/2012 at 12:59am - kids - by FoodyFood (woman) - Australia (South Australia)
Today, I met my girlfriend's parents. Her huge, ex-Marine father took me out back, saying he wanted to show me something. That something was a machete. He savagely buried it in a tree stump and said, "Son, if you break my daughter's heart, that'll be your dick." FML
I agree, your life sucks (25498) - you deserved it (4300)
On 03/14/2012 at 9:06pm - intimacy - by PUA - United States (Georgia)
Today, I had to ask my boyfriend to stop measuring his penis during our conversation. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18980) - you deserved it (2665)
On 02/27/2012 at 6:06am - intimacy - by facepalm (woman) - United States
Today, I managed to cut myself on a piece of chocolate. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19697) - you deserved it (5984)
On 02/21/2012 at 10:33am - health - by mary (woman) - Australia
Today, I was on the subway head bobbing to my favorite track when the guy across from me gets up, punches me in the face and says, "Don't nod at my wife like that." FML
I agree, your life sucks (22966) - you deserved it (2564)
On 02/19/2012 at 6:17am - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I discovered how startling it is to wake up by having your cat springboard off your face. The intended prey? Two fornicating geckos on the ceiling. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14781) - you deserved it (1485)
On 02/16/2012 at 2:52am - animals - by JukeboxValkyrie (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, I received a cute letter in my locker. It was in German, so I used Google translate. Apparently, someone hopes I choke on big fat cock. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21488) - you deserved it (2121)
On 02/14/2012 at 7:35pm - intimacy - by kittens go meow - United States (Georgia)
Today, I sneezed after watching a commercial involving dust. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12939) - you deserved it (4475)
On 02/07/2012 at 7:04am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States
Today, I received a single, hand-made Valentine's card from the weirdest kid in the school. It said, "If you ever get mauled by a bear, I hope he doesn't damage your face." FML
I agree, your life sucks (20382) - you deserved it (3738)
On 02/04/2012 at 12:12am - love - by Jayde - United States (Texas)
Today, my parents had a long discussion on whether a cut on my arm looked like a vagina. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19902) - you deserved it (1890)
On 01/26/2012 at 11:07pm - misc - by HylianFox (woman) - United States
Friday 24 May 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog 
Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
