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B5B0N35

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B5B0N35

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 13 January 1998 (16 years)
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 5075
  • Number of comments : 159
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About B5B0N35 : i am only human

B5B0N35's page activity

Visits<b>simplysarcastics</b> - 24 hours ago<b>underthestars55</b> - the 09/11/2014 at 5:18am<b>lexithepirate</b> - the 08/02/2014 at 3:03am<b>TrackGirl19</b> - the 08/01/2014 at 1:50pm<b>ImmaBelieverr</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 4:46pm<b>WubStep_</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 1:01am<b>TheLastSerenade</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 12:21pm<b>plateface1998</b> - the 07/16/2014 at 7:08am<b>emmachristine</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 7:02pm<b>alex_nsn</b> - the 06/26/2014 at 6:09am<b>DavidX</b> - the 06/21/2014 at 7:22pm<b>phoebeperry6</b> - the 05/26/2014 at 11:36pm<b>zjc2020</b> - the 04/30/2014 at 11:23pm<b>konstantinos616</b> - the 04/09/2014 at 8:49pm<b>DippinGrizzly907</b> - the 03/19/2014 at 3:21pm<b>MatteKudasai</b> - the 03/09/2014 at 9:16am<b>cooljak96</b> - the 02/01/2014 at 5:38pm<b>BlitzPKF</b> - the 01/30/2014 at 1:38pm

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B5B0N35's favorite FMLs

Today, I met my mom's fiancé. He's a nice guy, he's also my wife's dad. I'll soon call my wife my sister. FML

#20544337
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47221) - you deserved it (2997)

On 03/15/2013 at 1:31am - misc - by guy - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I asked my boyfriend to give me a back rub. He claimed that he had a sore hand, so I retorted, "You have two hands, right?" Still bitter about not being able to have sex with me while I'm on my period, he shot back, "You have two holes, right?" I give up. FML

#20540243
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32945) - you deserved it (50830) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 03/11/2013 at 8:21pm - intimacy - by Lilypad (woman) - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was caught "experimenting" with my friend at his house. His parents called mine, and my dad came to drive me home. On the way back, he tried to cheer me up by saying, "Son, don't be ashamed. When I was your age, I sucked a few dicks myself." Thanks for the info, Dad. FML

#20539287
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49479) - you deserved it (24478)

On 03/11/2013 at 7:33am - intimacy - by ugh (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, when I got home, my child had three bruises. My babysitter's excuse? "She hit me first". FML

#20538066
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48322) - you deserved it (5997)

On 03/10/2013 at 12:08pm - kids - by Amanda - Canada

Today, I was so bored at a dinner party that I went to the bathroom to play games on my phone. One of my co-workers came in, so I rushed into a stall, but forgot to turn my phone's sound off. She heard it and said, "It's OK, music helps me shit too" and started blasting her music and grunting. FML

#20534043
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27683) - you deserved it (6315)

On 03/06/2013 at 9:39pm - work - by shittysongs - United States (Washington)

Today, my boyfriend told me that he may have an STD. When I asked who he was with before me, and where it might have come from, he listed off almost every single one of my friends. FML

#20532270
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35298) - you deserved it (4918)

On 03/05/2013 at 1:57pm - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I asked my boyfriend where he went to lunch. He said he went to Wendy's. I teased him and asked if he got tired of eating burgers and Frosty's all the time. His response? "What? No, I mean at Wendy's. You know, the hot girl from work?" FML

#20524344
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35348) - you deserved it (5956)

On 02/27/2013 at 12:36pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my now ex-boyfriend called me out after I spelt "realised" with an S instead of a Z. It wouldn't have been so bad, if we weren't both British, if he hadn't called me an "illiterate idiot", and if he hadn't muttered "family of morons" when my mum backed me up. FML

#20519170
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27896) - you deserved it (4326)

On 02/23/2013 at 6:18pm - love - by singleandthankful (woman) - United Kingdom (Buckinghamshire)

Today, two days before I'm due to fly out to Russia on my first vacation, I caught my extremely over-protective mother trying to force the family dog to eat my passport. FML

#20518765
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31037) - you deserved it (1953)

On 02/23/2013 at 12:25pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Latvia (Aluksnes)

Today, I lost a bet with my friends. I had to go to the super market and buy a copy of 50 Shades of Grey along with a cucumber. The cashier was trying so hard not to laugh while ringing me up. FML

#20516035
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39135) - you deserved it (10337)

On 02/21/2013 at 8:43am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Idaho)

Today, I was making lunch, when my two-year-old ran up to me and handed me an empty bottle of baby powder. I soon realized I'd be spending the rest of my day cleaning the entire house. FML

Today, I finished my shift at the nursing home. There was too much snow on the roads, so most of us had to stay overnight. Not only did I not get to go home, I also got stuck sleeping in the same bed that a resident had died in the night before. FML

#20504938
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31230) - you deserved it (2118)

On 02/13/2013 at 12:20pm - work - by death bed (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, while waiting for my order at a restaurant, a woman walked up to me and slapped me. She looked at me for a moment and said "Sorry, I thought you were someone else." Ten minutes later, the same woman came back and slapped me again. FML

#20502782
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32832) - you deserved it (2424)

On 02/11/2013 at 8:42pm - misc - by Target - United States

Today, I gave my 5-year-old daughter a unicorn pillow pet. She ended up giving him an ill-advised name, and has been loudly proclaiming to everyone she sees that her pillow pet is Horny. FML

#20499722
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31441) - you deserved it (4370)

On 02/09/2013 at 3:03pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I found out my mother has enough toys to open a sex shop. FML

#20499258
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41054) - you deserved it (5304)

On 02/09/2013 at 7:00am - intimacy - by Lois - United Kingdom (Manchester)



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Friday 17 October 2014

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