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B5B0N35

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B5B0N35

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 13 January 1998 (16 years)
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 5063
  • Number of comments : 159
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About B5B0N35 : i am only human

B5B0N35's page activity

Visits<b>underthestars55</b> - the 09/11/2014 at 5:18am<b>simplysarcastics</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 9:23pm<b>lexithepirate</b> - the 08/02/2014 at 3:03am<b>TrackGirl19</b> - the 08/01/2014 at 1:50pm<b>ImmaBelieverr</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 4:46pm<b>WubStep_</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 1:01am<b>TheLastSerenade</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 12:21pm<b>plateface1998</b> - the 07/16/2014 at 7:08am<b>emmachristine</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 7:02pm<b>alex_nsn</b> - the 06/26/2014 at 6:09am<b>DavidX</b> - the 06/21/2014 at 7:22pm<b>phoebeperry6</b> - the 05/26/2014 at 11:36pm<b>zjc2020</b> - the 04/30/2014 at 11:23pm<b>konstantinos616</b> - the 04/09/2014 at 8:49pm<b>DippinGrizzly907</b> - the 03/19/2014 at 3:21pm<b>MatteKudasai</b> - the 03/09/2014 at 9:16am<b>cooljak96</b> - the 02/01/2014 at 5:38pm<b>BlitzPKF</b> - the 01/30/2014 at 1:38pm

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B5B0N35's favorite FMLs

Today, while having sex, I found out that I'm so flexible that when I bend over backwards, the backs of my knees can touch my shoulders. My boyfriend is now extremely jealous and is debating about breaking up with me. Even I don't get it. FML

#15113643
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43723) - you deserved it (4212)

On 02/25/2011 at 11:03am - intimacy - by inder (woman) - United Kingdom (Stoke-on-Trent)

Today, I went to see "Black Swan" with my parents, not realizing that it was basically a porno. So I sat next to my dad while Mila Kunis and Natalie Portman had passionate lesbian sex on a twenty foot screen. And I'm pretty sure I heard the old guy behind us jacking off. FML

#14689182
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35039) - you deserved it (6447)

On 01/23/2011 at 7:07pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I was making out with my boyfriend and he was fingering me. After he left, my mum says to me "I wish my sex life was as interesting as yours." She had walked in and we hadn't even noticed. FML

#14647585
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31963) - you deserved it (11087)

On 01/20/2011 at 4:39am - intimacy - by saddened97 (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my boyfriend of over one and a half years told me he won't give me a hand job because "it's awfully wet down there," and he isn't "a fan of other people's bodily fluids." FML

#14619610
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28234) - you deserved it (5755)

On 01/17/2011 at 10:19pm - intimacy - by No O-face (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was quietly reading in the subway, when all of a sudden, at a station, the man sitting next to me stood up, slapped me, yelled "Bitch!", and rushed off the train. FML

#14613102
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28142) - you deserved it (3279) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 11:46am - misc - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, my girlfriend and I were about to have sex for the first time. We are both virgins. After we kissed and I took down my pants, she screamed and said "That THING is going to break me." We never did it. FML

#14604817
232 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43922) - you deserved it (6329)

On 01/16/2011 at 8:28pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, after staying up all night at my friend's house, I woke up to something I couldn't identify on my cheek, so I slapped it away. When I heard crying, I opened my eyes and realized it was my friend's three year old sister who was trying to be sweet by kissing me on the cheek. FML

#14577933
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30406) - you deserved it (14332)

On 01/14/2011 at 1:22pm - misc - by ash (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I asked my boyfriend if my ass looked big in my new jeans. He looked, and then started singing "I like big butts and I cannot lie". FML

Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. He's been calling his penis "fun-sized" for a while now, but I didn't know he meant it really was the size of a fun-size candy bar. I'm pretty sure I'm still technically a virgin. FML

#14475422
309 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49089) - you deserved it (8433)

On 01/05/2011 at 3:49pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I accidentally walked in on my roommate while she was changing clothes. She insisted on telling her boyfriend what had happened, because, "It wouldn't feel right" if she didn't. Her boyfriend is a MMA fighter/bodybuilder and has major jealousy issues. I'm screwed. FML

#14297992
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39361) - you deserved it (3751)

On 12/22/2010 at 12:56pm - misc - by screwed (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, as I got to my first class seat on an airplane, I saw the person I'd be sitting next to wafting the smell of her vagina towards herself and breathing in deeply. It's an eight hour flight. FML

#14239433
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39866) - you deserved it (3460)

On 12/17/2010 at 8:28pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I walked into my room to find my roommate's boyfriend trying on one of my pink, lacy bras. My roommate then yelled at me for coming home early. FML

#14103618
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31366) - you deserved it (2579)

On 12/06/2010 at 2:20am - intimacy - by FreakinthePink -

Today, at work, a little boy shyly told his mom he thought I was cute. I smiled at him as she looked me up and down and said to him, "Eww, honey. No, you do not!" FML

#13853853
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32202) - you deserved it (2712)

On 11/15/2010 at 3:32pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, my virgin girlfriend who wanted to lose her virginity to me got on Google, and quizzed me on how to properly put on a condom. She doesn't trust me. FML

#13764909
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24488) - you deserved it (7822)

On 11/08/2010 at 1:23pm - intimacy - by wow (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my friend bought a smartphone and updated his facebook status with it. Two weeks ago he signed an apartment lease with another friend. Four months ago he bought a new handgun. Seven months ago he bought a new TV. He's owed me $300 for a year and a half. FML

#13762244
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25934) - you deserved it (7983)

On 11/08/2010 at 5:47am - money - by Anonymous - United States (New York)



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