About Azula272 : Captain: Princess, I'm afraid the tides won't allow us to bring the ship into port before nightfall.
Azula: I'm sorry, Captain, but I do not know much about the tides. Can you explain something to me?
Captain: Of course.
Azula: Do the tides command this ship?
Captain: I'm afraid I don't understand.
Azula: You said "the tides would not allow us to bring the ship in." Do the tides command this ship?
Captain: No, Princess.
Azula: And if I were to have you thrown overboard, would the tides think twice about having you smashed against the rocky shore?
Captain: No, Princess.
Azula: Well, then, maybe you should worry less about the tides, who've already made up their mind about killing you, and worry more about me, who's still mulling it over...
(Heh. MSG me if you dare...)
Profile completed
You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.
50 favourites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
Why am I up so early?
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
Today, I was delivering pizza. When I went up to the front door, an elderly lady answered. She was wearing a floral dress that went down to her shins and had a Nicolas Cage mask on with eye holes cut out. When I glanced behind her, I saw her cats had them too. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44041) - you deserved it (3576)
On 06/09/2013 at 1:13am - misc - by nicholascageonyourface (man) - United States (Nebraska)
Today, I brought my girlfriend home for the first time. I was really excited to introduce her to my parents, until we found my mother waving around a wooden sword, and my father trying to shove my sister into the dryer. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39636) - you deserved it (3949)
On 05/18/2013 at 4:06pm - love - by Mr_poole (man) - United States (Colorado)
Today, while walking home with my boyfriend, he jokingly slapped my butt. A man as old as my dad drove by, yelled "Wooo, spank that ass! DAMN!" and kept leering at me before finally driving off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36207) - you deserved it (4368)
On 05/17/2013 at 12:16pm - misc - by jessinono (woman) - United States
Today, my new neighbor moved in. Because she was fairly young, I offered to mow her grass whenever it needed cut. Her dad then tried to start a fight with me because he thought it was sexual come-on. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33550) - you deserved it (5596)
On 05/14/2013 at 7:52pm - misc - by Brenden - United States (Ohio)
Today, my new neighbor moved in. Because she was fairly young, I offered to mow her grass whenever it needed cut. Her dad then tried to start a fight with me because he thought it was sexual come-on. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33550) - you deserved it (5596)
On 05/14/2013 at 7:52pm - misc - by Brenden - United States (Ohio)
Today, my nose started running while in bed with my boyfriend. I kept trying to wipe it off with my arm to avoid ruining the moment. My boyfriend then looks up at me in horror. Turns out it wasn't mucus; it was blood. And it was all over his neck, his shirt, and his silk sheets. FML
I agree, your life sucks (51237) - you deserved it (8999)
On 05/07/2013 at 3:29am - intimacy - by Sirah90 (woman) - United States
Today, I tried lying to my parents for the first time. My mother is a neuroscientist and my father is a psychologist. Somehow, they managed to make me admit that I was lying before I'd even finished. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27414) - you deserved it (35493)
On 05/06/2013 at 8:52pm - misc - by blondie107 - United States (Texas)
Today, I woke up to the sound of my newborn screaming. I frantically hopped out of bed and stumbled into the nursery where I was met by the priceless sight of my five-year-old daughter attempting to breastfeed her understandably frustrated little brother. FML
I agree, your life sucks (57639) - you deserved it (4845)
On 05/06/2013 at 2:29am - kids - by SkeetinKeaton (man) - United States
Today, I woke up to the sound of my newborn screaming. I frantically hopped out of bed and stumbled into the nursery where I was met by the priceless sight of my five-year-old daughter attempting to breastfeed her understandably frustrated little brother. FML
I agree, your life sucks (57639) - you deserved it (4845)
On 05/06/2013 at 2:29am - kids - by SkeetinKeaton (man) - United States
Today, my dumbass colleague was too lazy to go buy balloons for a party in recognition of our company's huge merger. Instead, he made condom balloons. Let's just say you don't make blow up condoms for a prestigious company event. A company whose CEO is named Dick. FML
I agree, your life sucks (46070) - you deserved it (3704)
On 05/05/2013 at 12:14am - work - by ADickySituation - United States (Illinois)
Today, I was out with my grandma when a pair of very shady guys approached us in the street, hands in their pockets. Without breaking stride, she pulled a knife out of her handbag and told them they'd better keep walking. They did. What the fuck, gran? FML
I agree, your life sucks (44567) - you deserved it (6101)
On 05/04/2013 at 1:05pm - misc - by emasculated 10000% (man) - Sweden (Kronobergs Lan)
Today, while paying a $60 tab on drinks for a girl, a guy grabs the money-clip out of my hand and runs. I start to chase after him; the girl trips me, then runs after him. The bartender calls the cops; not to catch the thieves, but to report me for not paying. FML
I agree, your life sucks (46413) - you deserved it (3515)
On 05/01/2013 at 6:30am - money - by Alexman1985 -
Today, while paying a $60 tab on drinks for a girl, a guy grabs the money-clip out of my hand and runs. I start to chase after him; the girl trips me, then runs after him. The bartender calls the cops; not to catch the thieves, but to report me for not paying. FML
I agree, your life sucks (46413) - you deserved it (3515)
On 05/01/2013 at 6:30am - money - by Alexman1985 -
Today, while paying a $60 tab on drinks for a girl, a guy grabs the money-clip out of my hand and runs. I start to chase after him; the girl trips me, then runs after him. The bartender calls the cops; not to catch the thieves, but to report me for not paying. FML
I agree, your life sucks (46413) - you deserved it (3515)
On 05/01/2013 at 6:30am - money - by Alexman1985 -
Today, through sheer luck, I got talking to an actor from the Harry Potter films who I've had a crush on since I was about ten. I tried to play it cool, and pretend I didn't know who he was. Then my phone rang, with the Harry Potter theme tune. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19789) - you deserved it (36918)
On 04/30/2013 at 6:23pm - misc - by itsellie27 (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)
Monday 17 June 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog 
Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
