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AndyAutopsy

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AndyAutopsy
  • Town/Country : USA
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1635
  • Number of comments : 28
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About AndyAutopsy : I like chocolate milk :3

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AndyAutopsy's favorite FMLs

Today, my wife heard that wifi could be harmful for our newborn baby's undeveloped brain box. Her solution was to switch the wifi off on our laptops. She won't listen to the flaw in her plan. FML

#17411928
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20842) - you deserved it (2392)

On 08/08/2011 at 10:01pm - health - by anonymous - United States

Today, our power went out due to some severe storms. My daughter, who is 18, asked me why the lights on the car still worked. FML

#17333376
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31402) - you deserved it (8476)

On 08/01/2011 at 4:18pm - misc - by OhDeary (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was home alone, and enjoying my freedom decided to walk around naked blaring my radio. What my mother forgot to tell me before she left was that a guy was coming to fix our dish washer today. Imagine our mutual surprise as I danced around the kitchen while getting a drink. FML

#17254567
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25960) - you deserved it (10958)

On 07/25/2011 at 2:07pm - misc - by youjustsuck (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, after babysitting, the parents actually tried to pay me in Trident Layers Gum. FML

#17207993
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42541) - you deserved it (4545)

On 07/21/2011 at 8:20pm - money - by iwantmoney - United States (Ohio)

Today, I killed a centipede. Now every little itch I feel, I think it's the centipede's spirit coming back to haunt me. FML

#17188633
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13757) - you deserved it (39821)

On 07/20/2011 at 8:36am - misc - by ElixirRose - United States (Georgia)

Today, my new neighbor informed me with great relish that the house I have just bought is haunted because 30 years ago a man shot himself in the kitchen. I'm now paying a huge mortgage on a house I'm frightened to be alone in. FML

#17104871
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19356) - you deserved it (7854)

On 07/14/2011 at 4:59am - misc - by Boo (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, in science, we were studying reproduction. Our teacher was reading out the notes and claimed that 'the female's penis stiffens to enter the male's vagina.' I'm supposed to be learning stuff from this woman. FML

#16892674
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35150) - you deserved it (2785)

On 06/28/2011 at 2:39am - intimacy - by girlshavepenises (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I was reading a crappy "How to spice up your marriage" book with my husband for laughs. One of the ideas was for the guy to whip his knob out, stand behind his girl and say "Can you say that into the microphone?" Now he does it every chance he gets, and I fall for it EVERY TIME. FML

#16542323
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10127) - you deserved it (36656)

On 06/07/2011 at 3:50am - intimacy - by Kate (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I learned that "eating someone out" didn't actually involve food. FML

#16410366
402 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14938) - you deserved it (72843)

On 05/29/2011 at 11:34pm - intimacy - by yummy - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my girlfriend made me watch six hours of "Glee" with her. I don't know what I hate the most, the fact that I actually sat there and watched it or that I'm angry at Finn for breaking up with Rachel. FML

#16301661
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17974) - you deserved it (31072)

On 05/22/2011 at 7:09pm - misc - by why me -

Today, I woke up, rolled over, and kissed the boy who was peacefully sleeping next to me, cheerfully saying, "Good morning, baby!" That boy is my dog. FML

#16284228
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12752) - you deserved it (29479)

On 05/21/2011 at 5:29pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Denmark

Today, I offered to drive my girlfriend's grandpa to the doctor. I thus learned my girlfriend's grandfather has a colostomy bag when it burst all over the inside of my truck. FML

#16247260
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30931) - you deserved it (2754)

On 05/19/2011 at 12:27am - misc - by John -

Today, I searched frantically for my glasses for ages. After giving up, I realised I could see perfectly. I had been wearing them the whole time and neither my mother nor my father told me because "it was far too funny" watching me yell "Where the fuck are they?" FML

#16115344
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12972) - you deserved it (40575)

On 05/10/2011 at 6:48am - misc - by Kyle (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I searched frantically for my glasses for ages. After giving up, I realised I could see perfectly. I had been wearing them the whole time and neither my mother nor my father told me because "it was far too funny" watching me yell "Where the fuck are they?" FML

#16115344
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12972) - you deserved it (40575)

On 05/10/2011 at 6:48am - misc - by Kyle (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I decided to start my exercise video routine. It's an African dance workout DVD. Just as I felt confident and motivated about getting in shape, I realized that my window was wide open and my neighbors were getting a front row seat to me waving my arms in the air like an idiot. FML

#15855723
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13064) - you deserved it (21439)

On 04/20/2011 at 4:27am - misc - by JenniWearsPrada -



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