AndyAutopsy

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Offline (the 08/31/2014 at 7:51am)

AndyAutopsy

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 7100
  • Number of comments : 28
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About AndyAutopsy : I like chocolate milk :3

AndyAutopsy's page activity

Visits<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/09/2016 at 4:02pm<b>Torvaltz</b> - the 02/15/2016 at 2:19am<b>rebow</b> - the 02/03/2016 at 12:44pm<b>heroqucas</b> - the 01/11/2016 at 5:45am<b>PePziNL</b> - the 11/29/2015 at 8:27pm<b>jacksonpm23</b> - the 11/29/2015 at 5:30am<b>teejaycro</b> - the 08/29/2015 at 2:45pm<b>bushytomatoe</b> - the 05/12/2015 at 11:47am<b>black_sher</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 7:31pm<b>dictatorofpotato</b> - the 04/04/2015 at 2:53pm<b>je83185</b> - the 04/04/2015 at 12:29am<b>jordanrecatto</b> - the 03/31/2015 at 1:08am<b>Mexico_WC2018</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 10:27pm<b>thecman25</b> - the 01/08/2015 at 8:32pm<b>nikmiester</b> - the 10/25/2014 at 10:06am<b>brittn3yxrawrr</b> - the 10/23/2014 at 1:22am<b>sdlr32787</b> - the 10/16/2014 at 3:19pm<b>adam97</b> - the 09/22/2014 at 7:09am

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/04/2016 at 7:47pm<b>jacksonpm23</b> - the 11/29/2015 at 11:30am

AndyAutopsy's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

See all of AndyAutopsy's badges

AndyAutopsy's favorite FMLs

Today, our power went out due to some severe storms. My daughter, who is 18, asked me why the lights on the car still worked. FML

by OhDeary / 08/01/2011 at 4:18pm / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was home alone, and enjoying my freedom decided to walk around naked blaring my radio. What my mother forgot to tell me before she left was that a guy was coming to fix our dish washer today. Imagine our mutual surprise as I danced around the kitchen while getting a drink. FML

by youjustsuck / 07/25/2011 at 2:07pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, after babysitting, the parents actually tried to pay me in Trident Layers Gum. FML

by iwantmoney / 07/21/2011 at 8:20pm / United States (Ohio) / Money

Today, I killed a centipede. Now every little itch I feel, I think it's the centipede's spirit coming back to haunt me. FML

by ElixirRose / 07/20/2011 at 8:36am / United States (Georgia) / Animals

Today, my new neighbor informed me with great relish that the house I have just bought is haunted because 30 years ago a man shot himself in the kitchen. I'm now paying a huge mortgage on a house I'm frightened to be alone in. FML

by Boo / 07/14/2011 at 4:59am / United Kingdom (London) / Miscellaneous

Today, in science, we were studying reproduction. Our teacher was reading out the notes and claimed that 'the female's penis stiffens to enter the male's vagina.' I'm supposed to be learning stuff from this woman. FML

by girlshavepenises / 06/28/2011 at 2:39am / New Zealand (Auckland) / Intimacy

Today, I was reading a crappy "How to spice up your marriage" book with my husband for laughs. One of the ideas was for the guy to whip his knob out, stand behind his girl and say "Can you say that into the microphone?" Now he does it every chance he gets, and I fall for it EVERY TIME. FML

by Kate / 06/07/2011 at 3:50am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I learned that "eating someone out" didn't actually involve food. FML

by yummy / 05/29/2011 at 11:34pm / United States (Tennessee) / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend made me watch six hours of "Glee" with her. I don't know what I hate the most, the fact that I actually sat there and watched it or that I'm angry at Finn for breaking up with Rachel. FML

by why me / 05/22/2011 at 7:09pm / Geek

Today, I woke up, rolled over, and kissed the boy who was peacefully sleeping next to me, cheerfully saying, "Good morning, baby!" That boy is my dog. FML

by Anonymous / 05/21/2011 at 5:29pm / Denmark / Love

Today, I offered to drive my girlfriend's grandpa to the doctor. I thus learned my girlfriend's grandfather has a colostomy bag when it burst all over the inside of my truck. FML

by John / 05/19/2011 at 12:27am / Transportation

Today, I searched frantically for my glasses for ages. After giving up, I realised I could see perfectly. I had been wearing them the whole time and neither my mother nor my father told me because "it was far too funny" watching me yell "Where the fuck are they?" FML

by Kyle / 05/10/2011 at 6:48am / United Kingdom (London) / Miscellaneous

Today, I searched frantically for my glasses for ages. After giving up, I realised I could see perfectly. I had been wearing them the whole time and neither my mother nor my father told me because "it was far too funny" watching me yell "Where the fuck are they?" FML

by Kyle / 05/10/2011 at 6:48am / United Kingdom (London) / Miscellaneous

Today, I decided to start my exercise video routine. It's an African dance workout DVD. Just as I felt confident and motivated about getting in shape, I realized that my window was wide open and my neighbors were getting a front row seat to me waving my arms in the air like an idiot. FML

by JenniWearsPrada / 04/20/2011 at 4:27am / Miscellaneous

Today, I learned that when I leave skid marks in the toilet my wife uses my toothbrush to remove them. FML

by Toothy / 04/02/2011 at 1:03am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous