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AndyAutopsy

Offline (the 08/31/2014 at 7:51am) | Search for a member

AndyAutopsy

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 5232
  • Number of comments : 28
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About AndyAutopsy : I like chocolate milk :3

AndyAutopsy's page activity

Visits<b>dictatorofpotato</b> - the 04/04/2015 at 2:53pm<b>je83185</b> - the 04/04/2015 at 12:29am<b>jordanrecatto</b> - the 03/31/2015 at 1:08am<b>Mexico_WC2018</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 10:27pm<b>thecman25</b> - the 01/08/2015 at 8:32pm<b>nikmiester</b> - the 10/25/2014 at 10:06am<b>brittn3yxrawrr</b> - the 10/23/2014 at 1:22am<b>sdlr32787</b> - the 10/16/2014 at 3:19pm<b>adam97</b> - the 09/22/2014 at 7:09am<b>1644780</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 10:44pm<b>metalguitarist89</b> - the 08/14/2014 at 12:40am<b>BFons</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 2:09pm<b>battlehamster</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 3:33am<b>Betterthanu123</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 6:34am<b>cheshiro</b> - the 06/18/2014 at 6:04pm<b>misfitmask</b> - the 06/08/2014 at 12:47pm<b>why_teh_hell</b> - the 03/30/2014 at 7:58am<b>TheFirstHipster</b> - the 03/24/2014 at 1:06pm

AndyAutopsy's FML badges

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You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

See all of AndyAutopsy's badges

AndyAutopsy's favorite FMLs

Today, my dad's recycling went out of control. He now keeps a calendar of my periods, just to remind me to recycle the cardboard from my tampons. FML

#20078344
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23442) - you deserved it (1612)

On 09/18/2012 at 8:42pm - misc - by disgusted (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was pulled over. The cop stated that he "couldn't see" me because I had "blended in with the dark car background", and that it looked like no one was driving. I was literally pulled over for being black. FML

#20068526
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47242) - you deserved it (4101)

On 09/12/2012 at 3:00am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, the acne on one side of my face has flared up at the corners of my mouth, making me look just like The Joker. FML

Today, I learned that my 76 year old great aunt likes to swim naked, even when I have friends over. FML

#20051798
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22224) - you deserved it (1751)

On 09/01/2012 at 12:30am - misc - by MsConfusedd - United States (New Jersey)

Today, a small kid looked at me, screamed in terror, and hid behind his dad. I was just walking down the same aisle in the store. This is far from the first time it's happened. FML

#20051755
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20537) - you deserved it (2720)

On 09/01/2012 at 12:07am - kids - by KidKillah - United States (California)

Today, while getting pretty intimate with my newlywed wife in the car, a cop turned his lights on. As he was walking up, I was trying to get my pants back on but they wouldn't fit over my knees. The cop just laughed and walked away. Turns out my wife had my pants on and I was trying to put hers on. FML

#20048187
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30472) - you deserved it (7146)

On 08/29/2012 at 5:37pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my husband had a temper tantrum because I wouldn't get him a chocolate bar at the store register. FML

#20031596
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20924) - you deserved it (5450)

On 08/20/2012 at 8:12am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I had to bail my boyfriend out of jail. He got arrested because he was tugging his man-meat in the drive-thru at a McDonald's. FML

#20030745
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25782) - you deserved it (4984)

On 08/19/2012 at 10:05pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was at a barbecue with my extended family. I was chatting to my grandma, when my idiotic brother decided to douse the grill with his cola. The hissing sounded so much like a Minecraft creeper that I instinctively screamed and practically shat my pants. FML

#19993096
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9038) - you deserved it (26679)

On 07/30/2012 at 6:21pm - misc - by NaKreen (man) - Sweden (Vastra Gotaland)

Today, I had a few friends over. Wanting to seem cool, I yelled at my girlfriend to get me a beer. She chucked four bottles at my head. All my friends cheered her on. FML

#19957248
239 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6754) - you deserved it (73973)

On 07/19/2012 at 12:55am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, while at work, a lady with a mustache came in and told me she was lost. I was happy to help, but could not stop rubbing my nose due to allergies. As she left she said, "I know I have a mustache you little ass" and stormed out. FML

#19943603
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26995) - you deserved it (2574)

On 07/16/2012 at 12:08am - work - by crazyautio - United States

Today, I was listening to some Michael Jackson through my earphones when I saw this really cute girl. Trying to impress, I aproached her while doing some dance moves, not thinking about how unbelievably stupid it must have looked without the music. FML

#19913631
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7704) - you deserved it (32601)

On 07/09/2012 at 6:37am - misc - by Anonymous - Sweden (Vastra Gotaland)

Today, my girlfriend got a tattoo of a Rainbow Dash over her pubic mound. Now whenever I go down on her, I'll be eye-to-eye with an adorable pony that shits rainbows. FML

#19881608
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31833) - you deserved it (4930)

On 07/02/2012 at 3:53pm - intimacy - by nobrony (man) - United States (New York)

Today, while I was driving home, some jackass in an open-top sports car overtook us and flipped me off. Just as I overtook him in turn, my wife rolled down her window, pulled out her tampon, and launched it at the kid. I'm not sure who was more horrified: me or him. FML

#19793582
405 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37415) - you deserved it (4028)

On 06/15/2012 at 6:13pm - misc - by 16590 (man) - Sweden

Today, I got a new pair of glasses, and was driving home. While waiting at a stop sign, I noticed a homeless guy touching himself. He saw me, smiled and waved, and then continued. So much for my new eyesight. FML

#19771597
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23321) - you deserved it (2329)

On 06/11/2012 at 4:30pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States



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