Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Amethyst888

Search for a member

Amethyst888

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 8 February 1996 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 9371
  • Number of comments : 56
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About Amethyst888 : My Moto:
"Start the day with a smile!
(it irritates people) :)

Amethyst888's page activity

Visits<b>SurfingPichu</b> - the 11/04/2014 at 10:59pm<b>Mornai</b> - the 05/06/2014 at 9:06pm<b>aisg</b> - the 03/12/2014 at 11:25am<b>Iwtumn</b> - the 02/06/2014 at 7:28am<b>Val1020</b> - the 09/16/2013 at 10:33pm<b>YoshiEgg</b> - the 08/22/2013 at 7:17am<b>TheNew_Kid96</b> - the 08/21/2013 at 10:40pm<b>kjoseph98</b> - the 08/21/2013 at 5:16pm<b>Amelia_Jones237</b> - the 08/21/2013 at 5:10pm<b>GeneratorHalf</b> - the 08/14/2013 at 8:56am<b>turnabouttrial</b> - the 08/13/2013 at 9:03pm<b>MrsKent123</b> - the 07/24/2013 at 1:07am<b>reneetlovesyou</b> - the 07/12/2013 at 9:18am<b>Treyzania</b> - the 07/11/2013 at 11:12pm<b>ignoremeimweird</b> - the 07/11/2013 at 3:33am<b>ubertuber</b> - the 06/16/2013 at 9:47pm<b>MoeT8979</b> - the 05/20/2013 at 6:15pm<b>golden_warrior</b> - the 05/20/2013 at 6:43am

Amethyst888's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

See all of Amethyst888's badges

Amethyst888's favorite FMLs

Today, I decided to go buy myself a dildo to use on my lonely nights. Once at the adult store, I also grabbed a birthday card to make it seem the dildo wasn't for me. At the register, the cashier looked at me and said, "For God's sake, save yourself some money. I already know it's for you." FML

#20742274
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58653) - you deserved it (22887)

On 06/23/2013 at 6:38am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my dad invited our very cute neighbor inside to introduce him to me. I was wearing pajamas and hadn't showered in two days due to being extremely sick. FML

#20741405
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44523) - you deserved it (4750)

On 06/22/2013 at 6:59pm - misc - by Selina - United States (Kentucky)

Today, in a fit of paranoid hysteria, my mom threw out my phone, claiming the NSA can look through the camera to spy on me. I guess that's why you're still using your own phone to sext your latest boyfriend, eh mom? FML

#20737057
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39673) - you deserved it (2619)

On 06/20/2013 at 12:02pm - misc - by whoriblemomindeed (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my 16-year-old son broke two of his fingers playing with Play-Doh. FML

#20735100
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47087) - you deserved it (4789)

On 06/19/2013 at 12:12pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my parents decided they are going to come with me on my first date. FML

#20734991
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55797) - you deserved it (4115)

On 06/19/2013 at 10:39am - misc - by Overprotected (woman) - United States

Today, my daughter believed that watching the Big Bang Theory would count as studying for her chemistry final. FML

#20733887
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43173) - you deserved it (6640)

On 06/18/2013 at 7:22pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my boyfriend and I talked about our past relationships. He said he broke up with his last girlfriend because she was "too smart" for him, and that he felt better being with someone who "doesn't have too many lights on upstairs, if you know what I mean." FML

#20729746
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49435) - you deserved it (5712)

On 06/16/2013 at 4:57pm - love - by ... (woman) - South Africa (Eastern Cape)

Today, I was going through my daughter's contacts, except all of them had names from Harry Potter. I found the name "Mom." I was relieved I didn't have some silly name, until I realized it wasn't my number; it was her father's new wife. My number was under "Voldemort." FML

#20726673
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47914) - you deserved it (20249)

On 06/15/2013 at 12:19am - kids - by Jill (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend was extremely nervous to meet my parents but I made him do it anyway. One of the first things out of his mouth was, "I'm glad you had sex." When they gave him a look of shock, he added, "You know, when you made your daughter! She's awesome!" FML

Today, my grandpa pointed me out to one of his friends, saying, "Yeah, she's the ugly one." FML

#20717602
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46401) - you deserved it (3992)

On 06/10/2013 at 2:14pm - misc - by sadgirl - United States (Arkansas)

Today, at the gym, my boobs were jiggling more than the girl next to me. This would be a good thing, if I wasn't a guy. FML

#20712866
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47906) - you deserved it (15454)

On 06/08/2013 at 12:42am - health - by random - United States (Texas)

Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. She pulled down my trousers, saw my Poke-ball boxers, and absolutely lost it. I had to lie next to her in bed for the next 10 minutes hearing her howl with laughter while crying "Dickachu, I choose you!" FML

#20711208
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55125) - you deserved it (64240)

On 06/07/2013 at 3:10am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, while sexting my girlfriend, I accidently sent a picture to her father instead of her. He sent back a link to a penis enlargement company's website. FML

#20705129
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30819) - you deserved it (65617)

On 06/04/2013 at 8:15am - misc - by tinypenis - United States (New York)

Today, I was sending intimate pictures to my girlfriend and accidentally sent one to my best friend. He sent me one back. FML

#20690661
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55941) - you deserved it (32914)

On 05/28/2013 at 1:44am - intimacy - by Abrams52 (man) - United States (Indiana)



FML's blog

  • Cynthia's illustrated FML
  • TFIF indeed. It's time to kick off the suit and tie and forget about work. Some of us are going out for drinks with friends, others are going to enjoy some live music and some brave fools are going to keep fit…

Friday 28 November 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: