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Amethyst888

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Amethyst888
  • Town/Country : Unicorn Paradise, Unicorn States of America
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 8 February 1996 (18 years)
  • Number of visits : 6422
  • Number of comments : 56
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About Amethyst888 : My Moto:
"Start the day with a smile!
(it irritates people) :)

Amethyst888's last visitors

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You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

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Amethyst888's favorite FMLs

Today, I was at a basketball game. Sitting in the bleachers, I looked over at my friend and said, "Number 33 has a really cute butt." The man in front of us turned around, looked me dead in the eye, and said, "Thanks." Number 33's dad was a very proud father. FML

#21017330
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44854) - you deserved it (11662)

On 01/05/2014 at 12:30am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)

Today, I took my girlfriend out to a restaurant for her birthday. She had to go to the toilet while there, and when she came back, she was crying. When I asked why, she said "I'm on my period!" and sobbed loudly in front of everyone that we couldn't have birthday sex. FML

#21016986
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53040) - you deserved it (5400)

On 01/04/2014 at 8:08pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, I decided to do a little shopping at Victoria's Secret. The woman at the register smiled and asked, "Got a special someone to impress?" I told her that my boyfriend of three years was in town for New Year's and we haven't seen each other in months. Then I went home to my four cats. FML

#21013681
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47884) - you deserved it (9614)

On 01/02/2014 at 12:14am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, I found out that my dad is actually my uncle, and vice-versa. FML

#20994621
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50675) - you deserved it (2504)

On 12/16/2013 at 12:49pm - misc - by confsused - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my wife made me a Sex Rewards Chart, where I get points by doing chores and such, and 50 points gets me some action. She refuses to even look at me if I haven't earned the points, and is contemplating sleeping alone in the guest room until I earn more points. FML

#20983710
402 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53116) - you deserved it (15701)

On 12/07/2013 at 9:55am - intimacy - by feiedbutter - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to try flavored condoms. I guess I enjoyed them a little too much; I almost choked half to death on a strawberry cockcicle. FML

#20961988
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38230) - you deserved it (14843)

On 11/18/2013 at 10:26am - intimacy - by flavored (woman) - United States

Today, while working at Chipotle, a teenage girl asked in all seriousness if she "could have a steak burrito, but with like, chicken instead?" FML

#20951236
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40143) - you deserved it (3057)

On 11/09/2013 at 9:15am - work - by fmylyfe (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, she did it again. While I was minding my own business reading the paper, she casually walked up to me and slashed my face with her nails, drawing blood and screams of pain. I need to get out of this abusive relationship, but no one will adopt my asshole of a cat. FML

#20950555
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39175) - you deserved it (7164)

On 11/08/2013 at 6:02pm - animals - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, at a grocery store, a man came up to me while I was picking out apples and whispered in my ear, "That's how Snow White died." FML

#20947922
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40973) - you deserved it (3674)

On 11/06/2013 at 4:16pm - misc - by awkward - Canada (Alberta)

Today, half-way through my trip to Florida, I received a call from my friend of six years. "I sort of had sex with your girlfriend while you were gone." He said it "just sort of happened." FML

#20855295
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50584) - you deserved it (3388)

On 08/26/2013 at 4:17pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, someone on Facebook posted a really tiny picture that I couldn't read properly, so I responded, "What is this? A picture for ants?!" Turns out it was a commentary about rape, and now I look like an insensitive jackass. FML

#20849199
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36376) - you deserved it (10969)

On 08/22/2013 at 10:48am - misc - by Baustigt - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, as I was walking downstairs to get breakfast, I saw my parents had decided to have a quickie on the couch. I had to awkwardly stand out of sight on the stairs, too scared to go down, or even back up, because our stairs creak. FML

Today, I got sexual tingles while watching a Subway worker assemble my sandwich. FML

#20846728
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39405) - you deserved it (8526)

On 08/20/2013 at 6:46pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Sheffield)

Today, I asked out the girl who always looks and smiles at me in class. I was surprised when she rejected me until I found out she was actually always looking at the clock behind me, and smiling when class is almost over. FML

#20846650
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42926) - you deserved it (4249)

On 08/20/2013 at 5:37pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, one of the kids in my neighborhood told me he would mow my lawn for 10 bucks. After a few minutes, I heard the mower stop. He had mowed a penis into my front yard then run away. FML

#20841455
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42462) - you deserved it (7013)

On 08/17/2013 at 6:52am - kids - by Anonymous - United States



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