Alucard8307

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Offline (the 09/02/2015 at 9:43pm)

Alucard8307

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1483
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About Alucard8307 : Names edgar :) I'm a gamer/streamer stream name is fallentears1993 I play mostly league of legends if u wanna kno more plz ask :D

Alucard8307's page activity

Visits<b>CandyPewPewPew</b> - the 06/12/2014 at 3:00pm<b>x3jmac27</b> - the 06/04/2014 at 10:47pm<b>ThatOneGuy719</b> - the 05/23/2014 at 12:31am<b>SirRipsABong420</b> - the 05/19/2014 at 9:55am<b>XxXBadAshXxX</b> - the 04/20/2014 at 2:36pm<b>Dodger_fan16</b> - the 04/11/2014 at 2:34pm<b>LisaDay</b> - the 03/20/2014 at 2:01am<b>Wolverine33</b> - the 03/17/2014 at 6:16pm<b>Larissa24</b> - the 03/17/2014 at 3:53am<b>Absolutus</b> - the 03/17/2014 at 1:28am<b>JordanSonal</b> - the 03/17/2014 at 1:06am<b>ariiewilliams</b> - the 03/17/2014 at 12:43am<b>shhhaaarrron</b> - the 03/15/2014 at 3:46pm<b>JustinMrBest91</b> - the 03/15/2014 at 2:02am<b>Laxinitup</b> - the 03/14/2014 at 9:41pm<b>mea_iloveskiing</b> - the 03/14/2014 at 8:03am<b>Jellybellybeanz</b> - the 03/14/2014 at 7:34am<b>juditth</b> - the 03/13/2014 at 12:12pm

Alucard8307's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

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Alucard8307's favorite FMLs

Today, I was in the car with my boyfriend, who was driving down the highway with the windows down. All of a sudden, everything went black. A cattle truck had sped past, and I had been hit by cow faeces travelling at 110km an hour. My boyfriend was hysterical. None of it hit him. FML

by Felicityfrank / 05/01/2014 at 10:17am / Australia (Victoria) / Animals

Today, I'm trapped in my apartment. My new cat won't let me leave. Every time I try, he blocks the door, hisses and tries to savage me. I'm my own cat's bitch. FML

by aherdofpigs / 09/02/2013 at 3:22pm / United States / Animals

Today, I was video chatting with my boyfriend and his friends. When I stood up, he told his friend "See, she's not a twig!" I jokingly replied with, "So I'm fat?" After a few seconds of silence, his friend yelled, "It's a trap!" and left the chat. FML

by ImNotFat / 08/07/2013 at 2:04am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Love

Today, my boyfriend drove me back home. My dad was sitting on the porch in his underwear, with his shotgun in his lap. He stroked the gun, looked my boyfriend dead in the eyes, and slowly shook his head. Now my boyfriend refuses to see me for his own safety. FML

by Anonymous / 03/10/2013 at 6:37pm / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, I was taking a peaceful stroll in the local park when a curious turkey decided to follow me. Trying to shoo it away, I swung my leg at it, as if to fake kick it. Being the stupid animal it is, it decided to fly into my leg as I swung, causing my foot to connect to its neck. It died. FML

by Anonymous / 03/03/2013 at 9:40am / Australia (Queensland) / Animals

Today, my brother accidentally hit me in the throat. After I stopped coughing, choking, and feeling like I was going to die, he came back into my room, quietly said "I know your weakness," and left. FML

by Anonymous / 02/23/2013 at 1:28am / United States (Colorado) / Health

Today, I was walking through a crosswalk when a lady in a car looked at me with a horrified expression and then hit her door locks repeatedly. FML

by lobstercola / 11/24/2012 at 11:35am / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got into a car accident. The guy wouldn't give me his information, but instead stood there saying, "Like a good neighbor, Statefarm is there." FML

by Read The Fine Print / 11/24/2012 at 12:55am / United States (California) / Transportation

Today, my cat was too overweight to get out of the litter box, so he gave up, and went to sleep. I had to pick him up out of his own waste and clean him up. FML

by Jeanna S. / 11/23/2012 at 10:10am / United States / Animals

Today, my crush finally agreed to spend the night with me. I told my parents to act normal for one night. Apparently, "normal" is strutting around naked and acting like a chicken. FML

by schooyou101 / 11/17/2012 at 8:34am / United States (Kansas) / Love

Today, I asked my manager if wearing makeup was a requirement for the job. She told me, "Not if you're naturally pretty... So for you, yes". FML

by satega / 11/17/2012 at 4:15am / United States (Missouri) / Work

Today, just as I was about to orgasm, my boyfriend whispered, "Cum, my preciousssss" into my ear, in his scarily accurate Gollum voice. I think my clitoris just about withered away in despair. FML

by thanks, fuckface / 11/16/2012 at 2:42pm / United States (Colorado) / Intimacy

Today, it was my birthday. I finally got the PS3 I've been asking for, for a long time. When I opened the box, I didn't find a PS3, but a bunch of clothes that my mom put in my brother's PS3 box. FML

by Shauna / 11/10/2012 at 4:02am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, my dog and I were sitting on the couch. I went to the bathroom, came back, and saw him walk over the remote, which caused the TV to change to the Hustler channel, just a few moments before my girlfriend walked through the door. FML

by Sam l. / 11/10/2012 at 1:51am / United States / Animals

Today, I walked in on my son teabagging his sister over a video game. FML

by john r.t. / 11/09/2012 at 7:30pm / United States (Texas) / Kids