AbigailSarah93

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Offline (the 10/02/2014 at 8:16pm)

AbigailSarah93

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 938
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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AbigailSarah93's FML badges

Mobility

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50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

AbigailSarah93's favorite FMLs

Today, I tried to give my husband a striptease for his birthday. I wound up tripping over my own panties and nearly dislocating my shoulder. FML

by Anonymous / 08/01/2013 at 6:29pm / Mexico (Distrito Federal) / Health

Today, my phone went off, reminding me to take my birth control. Instead of vibrating as per usual, it rang. The ringtone had been changed to my boyfriend singing "It's birth control time, birth control time, take your pill, or I'll say it ain't mine." I was sitting in a quiet waiting room. FML

by turning red / 07/26/2013 at 9:14pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my husband was chased out of a bar after he was seen slipping something into a woman's drink. I was the woman, the 'something' was aspirin, and that's the last time we ever try to role-play. FML

by Anonymous / 07/23/2013 at 12:48am / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend dumped me. His reason was that my laugh is really annoying and makes him want to "stick a baby in a blender". FML

by ... cheers / 07/16/2013 at 4:32pm / United Kingdom (Renfrewshire) / Love

Today, my husband and I came clean to his overbearing parents about our private wedding. It started with them accusing him of making rash decisions, and somehow descended into an argument amongst themselves that ended with his mom deciding to divorce his dad. FML

by .__. / 07/16/2013 at 4:00pm / United States (Minnesota) / Love

Today, while I was getting intimate with my husband, he moaned someone else's name. He actually tried to explain himself by saying that he'd had a "divine encounter," and while "possessed by the Lord," he'd been told the name of our future daughter. FML

by lils / 08/05/2012 at 1:45pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend told me that if my penis was on any other body it would be considered small, but on me it's "cute." FML

by wf / 09/14/2011 at 2:11pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I learned that my daughter's gerbils are not afraid of the vacuum cleaner. FML

by corasmom / 07/27/2011 at 2:09pm / United States (Washington) / Animals

Today, my dog died. My parents told me to bury it out back. In the process, I managed to dig up my cat. FML

by Username / 07/01/2011 at 9:05am / United States (Virginia) / Animals

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend when he started shaking really hard. When I asked him what he was doing, he simply said "I want to be better than your vibrator!" FML

by Heyy / 11/24/2010 at 12:55pm / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, I found out my boyfriend watches porn. Specifically, today, while I was in the shower. In the next room. We were alone in the house and he still chose porn. FML

by anon / 10/25/2010 at 1:42am / United States (Kentucky) / Intimacy

Today, I went to the beach with this boy I like. Not thinking it'd be anything more than a simple date, I didn't shave my downstairs. We were sitting on a towel and I laid down. Then he said, "Is there a squirrel in your pants?" FML

by Claire / 09/29/2010 at 1:59am / Australia (Queensland) / Intimacy

Today, it's my birthday. I got a graphing calculator and my period. FML

by Anonymous / 09/27/2010 at 11:07am / United States (Kentucky) / Miscellaneous

Today, I discovered that if I put my ankles on my boyfriends shoulders while we are having sex, I will pee myself. FML

by noname / 09/22/2010 at 1:37am / Canada (Quebec) / Intimacy

Today, I couldn't fall asleep till 3am and was woken approximately every hour or so. Why? I found out my new upstairs neighbors have a very active love life. She's a screamer. FML

by SleeplessInSoCal / 08/09/2010 at 2:18am / United States (California) / Intimacy