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1two3four5six

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1two3four5six
  • Town/Country : Fareham, UK
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Saturday 1 August 1992 (21 years)
  • Number of visits : 883
  • Number of comments : 46
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About 1two3four5six : I'm addicted to the internet, funny, sarcastic, smart, and lazy as hell.

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1two3four5six's FML badges

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You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

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You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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1two3four5six's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend fingered me. He never cuts his nails. It felt like I was getting intimate with Wolverine. FML

#17107547
294 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41959) - you deserved it (10571)

On 07/14/2011 at 12:52pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my parents think that I don't realize all the sexual euphemisms in their conversations. One of the more recent ones being made by my dad at the dinner table: "This sausage is great, honey, but mine is bigger and tastier!" FML

#17094831
274 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36782) - you deserved it (2725)

On 07/13/2011 at 2:16pm - intimacy - by wittlegirl - United States (California)

Today, I had to bail my dad out of jail, for beating up my boyfriend, for sleeping with my mom. FML

#17089969
503 comments

I agree, your life sucks (117128) - you deserved it (5933)

On 07/13/2011 at 2:32am - intimacy - by whyme102008 - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend, who is very self conscious about her body, finally decided to have sex with me. She told me to wait a few minutes, so I did. I stripped and turned around to find her in a one-piece swimsuit, with a hole cut out of the crotch. FML

#17088739
428 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66640) - you deserved it (6939)

On 07/13/2011 at 1:02am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend and I were making out while she was laying on me. Her little brother walked in, saw us and yelled, "Mom they're swallowing each other!" FML

#17068940
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21781) - you deserved it (17520)

On 07/11/2011 at 5:08pm - intimacy - by tony456 (man) - United States (Vermont)

Today, I was woken up by my step brother trying to put his tongue in my mouth. FML

#17015904
352 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60127) - you deserved it (4793)

On 07/07/2011 at 3:49pm - intimacy - by lizownsvirgy - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend and I were having sex in the janitor's closet of the pet store where I work. We were really getting into it when we were rudely interrupted by dozens of salamanders crawling up our legs. I had forgotten to lock the cage before we started. FML

#16980520
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9151) - you deserved it (64457)

On 07/05/2011 at 12:32am - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (West Virginia)

Today, I looked out my window to see the sunset, but instead I see my neighbor dancing with strobe lights on and music blasting. He was by himself and had absolutely nothing on. FML

#16978964
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25468) - you deserved it (3522)

On 07/04/2011 at 10:38pm - intimacy - by danam - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my son called me from medical school, asking for a new phone. Why? Because he dropped it in the toilet. How? Trying to videotape his anus while taking a dump. I pay $80,000 a year just to hear he took a dump on his phone. FML

#16966057
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33851) - you deserved it (5011)

On 07/03/2011 at 9:50pm - intimacy - by WasteOMoney - United States (Texas)

Today, I snuck up on my girlfriend to give her a kiss. Only after I planted a big one did I realize it was not my girlfriend, or even a girl for that matter. FML

#16596385
234 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19614) - you deserved it (45551)

On 06/10/2011 at 3:06pm - love - by gabxoxo03 - United States (New York)

Today, I got my beautiful daughter ready to be a flower girl for the first time. A flower girl in the wedding of her father, my ex-husband, and the woman he cheated on me with. FML

#16495629
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44032) - you deserved it (3548)

On 06/04/2011 at 7:27am - misc - by maribel - United States (California)

Today, I finally found out what that weird smell in my apartment was. My ex-boyfriend had been breaking into my apartment and hiding rotting fruit all over the place. I found this out when a ceiling panel fell and a swarm of fruit flies attacked me. FML

#16424088
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29254) - you deserved it (3253)

On 05/30/2011 at 8:33pm - animals - by thiswouldonlyhappentome (woman) - Aruba

Today, I got a text from a girl that I've had a crush on for a long time, asking me out to dinner. I agreed and went to the restaurant. Not long afterwards, I got text from her saying something had come up, so she couldn't make it. As I was walking back to my car, I saw her walk into the same restaurant with another guy. FML

#14960685
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37310) - you deserved it (2567)

On 02/13/2011 at 4:14pm - love - by Saberwolf (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I wanted to annoy my sister by playing the air horn app on my iPhone. I forgot that I had headphones in. Let's just say I quickly had to change my underwear. FML

#14797258
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7427) - you deserved it (58213)

On 02/01/2011 at 1:50pm - misc - by Brea - United States (Missouri)

Today, I got my wisdom teeth cut out. While my girlfriend was driving me home, I, still being high on the laughing gas, accidentally admitted to cheating on her. She was kind enough to wait until the numbness wore off before she punched me in the face. FML

#14747577
319 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7872) - you deserved it (100028)

On 01/28/2011 at 8:06pm - love - by peeoncarl1111 - United States



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