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Thanks for all the funny comments! They made me feel better when I'm not actually feeling that great, considering what my boyfriend turned out to be like.... Speaking of which, I totally agree with most of you. Yes, I hung up on him and no, I did not bail him out. I think his sister did in the end. His fate and what he actually did to get arrested are unknown to me, honestly I just knew we were done the second he finished the song and then said 'so, babe, can you bail me out?' Never thought he could be like this. Very disappointed in him. But still thoroughly impressed at his singing (he recited it perfectly). :) thanks guys!!

By Broken - 03/11/2015 18:13 - United States - Billerica

Today, I took my nephew to the roller rink and I broke not one arm but both. Now I can't even wipe. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 592

You deserved it 1 792

By Kurt's Dad - 15/05/2019 16:04

Today, during my grandmother's funeral, my talented ten-year-old son found the church organ and began playing Smells Like Teen Spirit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 794

You deserved it 333

Chance encounter

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2019 but it's good stuff

Today, while browsing through Walmart, I slipped on a piece of clothing and fell backwards into an obese lady’s butt. When I landed, she farted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 298

You deserved it 366

By limeñaconmalasuerte - 17/06/2017 21:00 - Peru

Today, the guy I have a crush on invited me over to his house. I was nervous and excited, until I found out that he really just wanted me to clean it. Apparently, my friends from the university told him that was my job and he believed them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 292

You deserved it 389

By Failed_Dad - 25/09/2015 05:42 - United States - Davis

Today, with the most certainty and confidence that I have ever seen in her, my 16-year-old daughter told me an egg is a fruit because of its "hard shell and growing seed." FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 700

You deserved it 2 738

By KindaLooksLikeCocaine - 23/09/2015 23:56 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I walked in on my drunk roommate grinding up stale marshmallows and attempting to snort them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 762

You deserved it 1 757

Judgemental

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - United States - Boston

Today, on the bus, a little boy gave me the dirtiest look, pointed at my pregnant stomach, and menacingly said, "I know what you did." FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 555

You deserved it 7 850

By extrashiftwhoo - 04/11/2016 13:59 - Australia - Preston

Today, I really didn't want to go to work. Still, I showed up for work early on the busiest night of the week and stayed back until past 10 p.m. Exhausted, I went to sign off the roster when I realised that, in fact, I was not rostered on for today at all. I'm on tomorrow, though. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 912

You deserved it 3 534

By macguy - 20/10/2016 14:25 - Philippines - Quezon City

Today, I got mugged. For my Big Mac. What the fuck? FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 220

You deserved it 1 012

By egnur_mas - 02/08/2017 17:44

Today, while manscaping in the shower, I found out that things can still get caught in the clippers, even with a guard on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 107

You deserved it 779

egnur_mas tells us more.

egnur_mas 19

Wednesday 2 August 2017 13:54

Bridger you're on the right track mate, I'll have to take a little more care from now on. Considering the circumstances I'm still pretty stoked to have my first submitted FML published!