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OP here. To clarify, I'm the secretary and the official number was over 7 times my salary. The client's case was indeed unique and not a regular event, but it didn't make me feel any better...especially considering that I can't afford my own apartment here in good old New Jersey.

By UniGrad2019 - 26/01/2016 04:54 - United States - Fredericksburg

Today, after months of all my friends telling me that the guy whom I was in love with most definitely held feelings for me, I was finally convinced by their words, and with confidence I went and confessed my feelings to him. I was rejected. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 863

You deserved it 2 010

Wrong place, wrong time

By lug_nut - 06/01/2010 05:24 - United States

Today, I went to my boyfriend's house so that he could break up with me. I went out to my car to leave only to discover that all of the wheels had been stolen. Even the spare. I had to spend the rest of the day with my ex-boyfriend finding a way to get my car home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 484

You deserved it 3 338

Dude, gross!

By Mojo0608 - 02/11/2014 21:28 - United Kingdom - London

Today, my 16-year-old brother once again scored well at a local archery competition. He got home and, once again, unleashed his "spectacular aim" at the toilet - or rather the toilet seat and surrounding floor. He refuses to clean the bathroom we share every single time he does this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 305

You deserved it 2 546

By TheSacredTeddyBear - 31/07/2013 03:06 - United States - Independence

Today, I finally gave away all of the stuffed animals that I've been hoarding for years. Proud, I told my family. They congratulated me by buying me stuffed animals. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 982

You deserved it 4 979

By weaknesspersonified - 10/11/2015 23:25 - Austria

Today, I felt sad, useless and like I could never achieve anything. To cheer myself up, I wanted to smell some essential orange oil. I couldn't open the bottle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 397

You deserved it 3 724

In the midst of life we are in debt

By krissysays - 25/10/2010 02:16 - United States

Today, I heard on the news that the average debt one is in when they graduate college is $24,000. I've been in college for one year and my debt is already $20,000. And it turns out that my school's accreditation does not exist like I was told. $20,000 in debt and no college credits to show for it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 174

You deserved it 7 784

By alikat - 26/04/2009 15:13 - United States

Today, I found out that the noise I thought was a mouse in my room was a water bottle shaking when my refrigerator turned on. I stayed up till 4am looking for a mouse that didn't exist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 232

You deserved it 44 559

Terrorized

By Whoopsie - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - United States - Worcester

Today, I woke up loudly screaming from a "night" terror. I say "night"; I was actually at my desk at work, in the middle of the day, surrounded by dozens of co-workers in their cubicles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 097

You deserved it 11 409

By Bestbirthday - 12/07/2016 01:04 - United States - Bastrop

Today, my parents were supposed to take me out to eat for my birthday, but since their favorite child wasn't with us, I instead got a mini order of tots from Sonic as my birthday meal/present. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 222

You deserved it 868

Adding annoyance to almost injury

By Anon - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United Kingdom

Today, while I was walking to my car, I was mugged. Not only did they take my phone, wallet and watch, the extra few minutes taken in my journey meant that when I got to my car, I was given a parking ticket. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 804

You deserved it 2 833

By Rabzouz - 20/12/2008 08:16 - France

Today, I opened a packet of cereal and it exploded on my keyboard; now, my keyboard crackles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 726

You deserved it 12 261

By 117halo12345 - 17/12/2015 21:37 - United States - Sedgewickville

Today, I was showing my 4 year old some of my fire magic tricks. I ended up getting 2nd degree burns on my left hand and burnt off half of her hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 290

You deserved it 21 774

By ColoradoGirl420 - 24/03/2014 18:53 - United States - Colorado Springs

Today, at my job as a bouncer at a music venue, a guy got his nose broken in a rowdy mosh pit. When I went to help him up and see if he was okay, he said, "It was an accident, please don't kick me out," but the word "please" came out as a hot spray of his blood across my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 658

You deserved it 3 457

ColoradoGirl420 tells us more.

ColoradoGirl420 10

Thursday 27 March 2014 20:07

Hey All. I did immediately go wash up once I confirmed that he was okay, he thought I was going to kick him out for moshing, I don't think he realized quite yet that his nose was broken, he was pretty drunk. And I am a chick, not a dude :) I get tested regularly anyway, but he and I did have a conversation after he went and cleaned himself up too. I explained that I was worried about disease and he looked positively horrified at the thought and insisted that he was clean. But I did get checked, came back all good. And I love my job, it's only part time, I only work the big shows, been doing it for a while and this is the only time this has ever happened to me. It didn't scare me off like my boss thought it would when he saw me marching off in a huff to the ladies room to clean myself up! lol

By jf29 - 31/01/2009 00:49 - United States

Today, I drunkenly buried my girlfriend's recently deceased cat. Later she asked to see it and came back inside crying. It turns out I didn't bury it completely and its two back legs were poking out of the dirt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 650

You deserved it 46 839