Mr Geluwe, Belgium 28 years-old
Today, as I have been for 10 years, I'm allergic to fruit. After an argument with my mother, she yelled, "Here, have a banana and go kill yourself!" FML
Today, my mom made up a new game. She thinks it's hilarious to hide my brother's creepy Batman toy around the house to creep me out. This has been going on for hours and I still scream every time. FML
Today, in an attempt to break up with my boyfriend, I told him, "I don't feel a mental connection between us." His reply? "Why do we need a mental connection?" FML
Today, I lost my dog and so I put up 'lost' signs. As I was coming back home I noticed one had been written on. It said: "Found your dog. Keeping it". FML
Today, the kids I babysit hid from me. While I was looking for them, I stepped on multiple strategically-placed Lego bricks. When I yelped from the pain, the kids jumped out and threw soccer balls in my face. FML
Today, I found out I have something in common with three other girls. We all have the same boyfriend. FML
Today, I was babysitting my barely-pubescent cousins, and they started talking about giving blowjobs to their "boyfriends". When I got mad at them, telling them they shouldn't be thinking of that stuff, they said I was just pissed because I "haven't gotten laid." FML
Today, my boyfriend yelled at me from the other room for washing the dishes "too loudly". FML
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