jcarter25

Explain yourself

Today, I forgot to clean up poop before a home inspection, so the inspector questioned me on why I had dried shit sitting on a table, with flies all over it. FML

Today, at a family dinner, my mom announced that my newborn brother was named after his father. His name is Kevin. My dad's name is Michael. FML

Today, my wife told me alcohol gives me "increased confidence without increased ability." FML