GovernorPhil

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Governorphil's favorite FMLs

By offbeans - 17/02/2009 02:29 - United States

Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, "Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!" He looked at me and replied, "How about some blue shut the fuck up?!" FML

agreeclassic 267 597

vote type 1 90 937

By ReallyMom - 09/01/2014 21:48 - United States - Shawano

Today, my mom tried giving me the sex talk. Her version of "the talk" consisted of making me watch videos of guys jacking off and reassuring me that "it's natural." FML

agreeclassic 57 724

vote type 1 5 210

By Anonymous - 25/09/2013 21:33 - United Kingdom

Today, I walked in on my roommate whacking off to clown porn. FML

agreeclassic 58 269

vote type 1 7 070

Pleased to meet you

By Anonymous - 15/09/2013 19:53 - Romania - Bucharest

Today, I saw an elderly gentleman in the street wearing a shirt with a big QR code on it. Amused, I used an app on my phone to decode it. It gave me a shortened web address, which I followed, only to be faced with a picture of the same gentleman naked, grinning, and giving a thumbs up. FML

agreeclassic 62 112

vote type 1 31 390

Unexpected arousal

By Anonymous - 20/08/2013 22:46 - United Kingdom - Sheffield

Today, I got sexual tingles while watching a Subway worker assemble my sandwich. FML

agreeclassic 50 858

vote type 1 12 342