Today, my boyfriend made me sit in his kitchen while he Skyped his mother because he doesn't "feel ready" to tell her he has a girlfriend. He's 23, lives on a different continent and has been dating me for over 6 months. FML
haztod tells us more.
haztod 19
Hi, OP here - I'm super surprised this got posted! Just to clear some things up: my boyfriend is American and studying here in the UK. I have met his sister and we get along super well, but not anyone else in his family, nor do they know he's dating someone. From what I understand, his parents - especially his dad - aren't really big on relationships, especially when studying, as they can be seen as a distraction. I know for a fact that it was his mom as they usually do voice calls and I sit quietly, but she wanted a video chat so I shifted rooms on this occasion; there's definitely not another girl in the picture! I spoke to him about it after the call and explained that it upset me a little and made me feel like he had to hide me, and he was very apologetic and felt guilty - he told me this was his first serious relationship and he wasn't really sure what the right steps were in terms of parents or when they should happen which I actually found quite sweet. This is definitely not a deal breaker - he is so wonderful I wouldn't let something like this ruin our relationship! He just Skyped his mom again tonight and told her the news, so it's no longer an issue. He has met all my family and they adore him, so no issues there!
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Joshwarrior 39
And that's not a deal breaker for you why?
xx000o 27
An option would be to walk up to the camera in your birthday suit and tell him you missed your period the last two months.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (112)
Joshwarrior 39
And that's not a deal breaker for you why?
MrsDruidess 23
yeah op, this guy is obviously a mommas boy. Things like this will be a challenge throughout your relationship. You should really look at that and see if that's something you're willing to put up with for the long haul, you're not going to able to change that in him.
yolibeth221 9
Best bet is to walk by while they're skyping and say hi to her, and see what goes on from there.
xx000o 27
An option would be to walk up to the camera in your birthday suit and tell him you missed your period the last two months.
SexiChula91 3
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
How is it a deal breaker? Maybe he would like to make sure its really serious before telling his mom. Most likely, to the mom, the introduction is a sign of escalation into engagement. some cultures are like that.
Bigfabthetruth52 22
i mean the fact that he lives on another continent,a reason op mentioned, could make him culturaly different and also meeting someones parents is a big step in a relationship in a lot of peoples eyes.
mkymouse90 17
Its been 6 months and it looks like they're living together what's not serious
Joshwarrior 39
Yeah but I think the gf is pissed due to him being a dick about it. If there was a cultural/religious reason you would think she would be more understanding or she would include it in the fml. Oh and 31 has an amusing idea (:
haztod 19
I actually posted a follow up later in the comments with some more details and the aftermath if you would like to take a look :) I know for a fact when I read an FML, some more details from the OP are always nice and tend to clarify the FML and the circumstances surrounding it.
nokturn_fml 11
Yeah that can't be good...
Pinkraincoat 18
Don't waste anymore more time with someone with a mindset like that. There's a guy out there who will treat you with so much more respect!
patrickalamo 48
He may be protecting her from the monster-in-law...
traviscool 12
just because he doesn't want her to meet his parents, doesn't mean he is horrible?
Laidbackmofo 13
Don't judge the OPs bf so harshly, he is not being disrespectful. If anything he is just shy.
Jared900DUmpling 30
Imagine how surprised he'd be if you just called her and told her yourself... Hopefully he gets a bit more confidence in him in a while so this kinda thing doesn't recur
clrichmond2009 24
what is now my mother in law found out about my existence that way. I called my husband, and he was asleep so she answered. she was floored when I told her I was his girlfriend.
xbrit551 13
hmm...
frogletts 18
You should have just walked in and introduced yourself to her
ironichalibut 24
And without a shirt on too!
Bano360 25
Definitely the best idea. Walk in and say that you're his girlfriend. He needs to get over that irrational fear.
happylappy 21
I don't get why he would hide it. There's a possibility he could have a girlfriend (or even wife!) back home.
syki 22
In some cultures, you don't "date." There might be some intermingling that's supervised by chaperone, but loads of couples worldwide only meet when they get married. The other possibility is that OP is of a different race than the boyfriend and his mom, especially if she's white or black and he's from a more conservative Asian or African country.
jazzy_123 20
maybe he's a mommas boy and is afraid of what she'll say? maybe she tends to scare off his girlfriends?
DeadPixel4 29
Probably
gracehi 33
I don't know why you're getting voted down, 8. That was my first thought too. He has a girlfriend back home with whom his mother is acquainted and doesn't want to get caught cheating or complicate things. It's a perfectly reasonable theory if you ask me.
nchic01 17
awh sorry op
CrissyyyS2 22
When I started going out with my boyfriend.. I didn't tell my parents till after 2 years. I was pretty darn terrified of my father. Coming from an Asian family, he expected me to finish College then get a stable job THEN can I finally have a boyfriend. :X Hope your boyfriend has a good and understanding reason to not tell his mother.
Joshwarrior 39
I can understand that but if he is independent I can't see of any really good reason for him not to tell jer if he really likes the girl unless she is paying for his expenses which I am going to assume not even though I may be wrong. (sorry for the run on sentence)
famvd 15
Maybe he's scared to introduce you because his mom might have been a bitch in the past about his previous girlfriends, and he actually just wants to keep you.
StiffPvtParts 43
Precisely what I though, some parents can be very controlling :3