Today, I took my car through the car wash. I got bored, so turned the radio on, forgetting that the aerial/antenna on the car is automatic. My car aerial is now bent at a 90 degree angle and about to fall off. The radio is half white noise, half stuff that may or may not be free jazz jam sessions. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I took my truck through an automatic car wash. During the wash, the bristles on one of the automatic scrubbers ripped my metal antenna off of my car. The antenna was stuck spinning around in the scrubber, smacking and scratching the entire side of my car, top to bottom. FML
Today, I drove through a drive-through car wash. The steering wheel turned left on it own. I was pretty sure the railing guided the car but my stupid ass turned the wheel to the other side and popped the car off the rails. It crashed into one of the machines and now I have a huge dent to the front of the car. FML
Today, I got rear-ended trying to move off the road because I heard a police siren. It was the radio. FML
Today, while driving my car, there was a talk on the radio about road safety. I got so engrossed that I drifted and crashed my car into a sign promoting the talk. FML
Today, while I was at work, a co-worker watched while some kid stole the radio out of my car. FML
Today, the Snapchat that I was taking of my car being washed, including my commentary like, "Oooh yeah, get into it baby," was replayed loudly through my car via Bluetooth while the workers were inside and all around washing it. FML
Today, I bought a truck. It's a little beat up, but I got a pretty good deal because of it… Or so I thought. Turns out there's a Nickelback CD stuck in the player. And the radio is spotty. I can't help but think that had something to do with it. FML
Today, I was driving down a highway during rush-hour. I heard my phone ring and couldn't find it. I bent down to feel around for it and got in an accident and totaled my car. The ringing? A commercial on the radio. Where was my phone? On my dresser at home. FML
Today, I went to get my car washed at one of those places where you can watch through the glass. I watched in horror, face pressed against the glass, as my car went through with the window down. FML
Today, the horn in my car decided to malfunction. It honked continuously for an hour as I drove down the highway. FML
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Top comments
perdix 31
Get it fixed or get an iPod. I should charge for such insightful advice. Today, I gave away valuable. brilliant advice for free. I'm broke. FML.
wildlyapathetic 0
How ******* crippling is your ADD if you can't sit through a *four minute carwash* without getting bored? Most people in that situation just relax, look at the pretty multicolored bubbles, then they're on their merry way. You, on the other hand, apparently start gibbering and twitching, starved for stimulation within a minute. If you ever have to sit in a waiting room for more than five minutes, you'll probably have a nervous breakdown.
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Comments (45)
Murakami_fml 0
"Half stuff that may or may nto be free jazz sessions." Brilliant! XD Kind of makes up how dumb what you did earlier was, haha. Unlucky.
RushFanatic 0
Heheheh...Jazz...
perdix 31
Get it fixed or get an iPod. I should charge for such insightful advice. Today, I gave away valuable. brilliant advice for free. I'm broke. FML.
chalkdust 4
What car has a radio antenna anymore? Really. Get an iPod.
timtam24 0
old cars?
Intoxicunt 6
Not everyone wants to listen to the same old shit. I personally like listening to the radio. I hear new stuff and don't have to pick anything out. Granted, satellite radio is better, but whatever. I'm pretty sure most cars still do have radio antennae. I see what looks to be one on the 2010 Mustang... http://www.fordvehicles.com/resources/ford/mustang/2010/highlights/mst10_highlight_lg_v6convertible.jpg
Wet_Dream 0
american cars are not the best in the world.. old fashion stuff with big engine.. nothing more nothing less!
DeadPixel4 29
This was posted in 2009. Jackass.
soccerskillz 0
CHECK IT OUT!!!!!!!!! http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/2264521/who_will_win_the_2009_world_series.html?cat=9 GO read my aricles!! Theres alot to learn!
lone_wanderer 0
You're living in the past man! Get a zune or if you want to be normal get an iPod :)
misspeg 0
YDI. that's one of the things they put on the signs that u need to check before u go into the car wash. and this is totally unrelated but...why don't they have an app for MLIA?
wildlyapathetic 0
How ******* crippling is your ADD if you can't sit through a *four minute carwash* without getting bored? Most people in that situation just relax, look at the pretty multicolored bubbles, then they're on their merry way. You, on the other hand, apparently start gibbering and twitching, starved for stimulation within a minute. If you ever have to sit in a waiting room for more than five minutes, you'll probably have a nervous breakdown.
Sushimomo 0
Sounds like me... That's why I always have my iPod with me
StacheeMcGee 2
That was so ******* serious man. Your eyebrows must have been touching your nose.It was funny though
stunty_fml 0
"Antenna is bent?! Noooooooooo!!!! ANTENNAAAA!!!! Stay with me! Don't follow the bright light! Live, you bastard!!" *thump, thump, thump, thump, breath* (sound of an amateur CPR) "I love you so much, don't leave me! You picked up so many radio waves over the years, made me happy so many times, and now you want to give up on me? Nooooo!! I'll never be happy without you!" . . . I think somebody should make a movie out of this.
Kervik 0
LOL! :D
halfmanhalfbearh 0
freakin' hilarious...you TOTALLY should make a movie outta that! L.O. flippin' L.
misspeg 0
why is there not an app for MLIA? ... and who keeps thumbs downing my comments *shakes fist*
Intoxicunt 6
It's not getting thumbs-downed, it's getting moderated for breaking a rule.
Veritas143 0
I hate when things get Moderated..because now I really want to know what it said but can't even uncover it.. it's the forbidden fruit of FML..
Kervik 0
She said something along the lines of who keeps putting thumbs down on my comments.
Veritas143 0
And now I'm just disappointed..