Today, I had to pee really bad so I tried to unlock my door as fast as I could. I put my key in and turned it too hard, the key snapped inside. I ended up peeing on myself. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I got the strong urge to pee right as I got home from work. In my hurry to get inside, I grabbed my keys out of my pocket. They flew out of my hand, into the bushes. I couldn't find them in time and ended up wetting myself in my driveway, three minutes before I had to pick my daughter up from school. FML
Today, I locked the door to our only bathroom so my two year old wouldn't get in and make a mess. I crapped my pants while trying to unlock it with the key that rests on the frame. FML
Today, I was at work and I needed to pee. In my haste, I forgot to lock the door. A coworker walked in on me and I bolted up mid-stream to slam the door back shut. I had pee down my leg and pee squishing in my shoes for the rest of the day. I can still remember his tone of voice, yelling, "Sorry"! FML
Today, I went to take a piss in a public bathroom. Somehow, I managed to completely jam the lock. After minutes of trying to get myself out, I gave up and crawled under the stall, at which point someone walked in and was very surprised to see me on the floor. FML
Today, I was locked out of my house and had to pee. I waited an hour for my boyfriend to come home. When I saw him pull into the driveway, I peed myself in excitement. FML
Today, as I was closing my car door, I realized I had left the keys in the ignition. Not wanting to lock myself out, I reached to stop the door from closing. Not only did I scream when the door slammed on my hand, but in my furious pain, I leaned on the door, locking my keys inside. FML
Today, I woke up in the middle of the night and had to go to the bathroom in my dorm. After coming out of the bathroom, I realized I'd let my auto-locking door close behind me. I had to go through the whole dorm, sprint across campus in my bra and underwear, and ask someone for my spare key. FML
Today, I locked my keys in the house. I panicked so hard and immediately started kicking the door, desperate to get my keys. My boyfriend, who I forgot was staying over, woke up and opened the door right as I kicked it, and the door smashed into his face. FML
Today, I had to take a serious piss. I started urinating and leaned back slightly on my heels. Somehow I lost my balance and fell backward, hitting my head on the wall behind me and spraying myself and my entire bathroom with my own pee. FML
Today, I was so desperate to pee that I used the only bathroom in the convenience store I was in, which was “Employees Only.” Well, the door got stuck and I had to get an employee to let me out. FML
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Top comments
papertigers_fml 0
hot.
mel92_fml 0
why didn't you just pee in a bush or something?
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Comments (64)
ilaughatfmls 0
ahh i know how you feel. happened to me once.. not the same exact thing, but close...
hahaha6 0
#20...... Until you're arrested and are now on the list of sexual offenders.
SadButSoTrue 0
#22 You sir, win.
shoeofallcosmos 0
Man, that bites. I'm sorry.
Demon_Squirtle 0
Can't believe no one's said this yet... Oh snap! But I digress. That's unfortunate.
tiltwrestler 0
Why didn't you just run around to your back-yard (or if you live in an apartment, in any secluded spot) and just pull the pants down and let it go? I mean, i don't get it. no matter how bad i gotta pee, i can always hold it a few seconds to get my pants down real quick. but it must be different for girls, im guessing?
randomsloth 0
dude i do that weekly hahaah got to have the occasional peeing of the pants
Exlibris 0
You couldn't ask a neighbor to use theirs or get back in the car and go somewhere with a restroom? I've had to go pretty bad but past the age of 10, wetting yourself is pushing it.
kellster 2
I'm appalled at how many pant-pee-ers there apparently are out there!! No matter how badly I've had to go, I have never in my adult life actually peed my pants. What is wrong with all of you???
alex_vik 1
And this is why you don't buy plastic keys.
stripedoctor 3
that's just gross.