Today, I awoke at 5am to the smell of smoke and the sound of sirens. It seems the whole Santa Monica Fire Department had made it outside our apartment complex. We had to wake up every single person on our floor. What for? An old lady burned a muffin. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was sleeping in my apartment when I woke up to the smell of smoke. Alarmed, I ran out to the kitchen to find my roommates trying to put out a fire on the stove. As soon as they saw me, they ran for it, informing me that it was my problem now. They used my good frying pan. FML
Today, at 2:47 am, my mom woke me up in a panic screaming about smelling gas and the house blowing up. Twenty minutes, two fire trucks, and a traumatized dog later, it was just the neighbors burning their mail. FML
Today, I made Christmas dinner. I live in a block of flats, and I was cooking for two hours. The smoke alarm went off after 10 minutes, but it's so high up that I couldn't reach it to turn it off, so I had to fan it off every five minutes, then five minutes later it would go off again, and so on. The neighbors complained. FML
Today, I was looking forward to my only day to sleep-in this month while I'm balancing school and work. I was rudely awakened at 6 am by my sister and her friend trying to make pancakes, burning them, and setting off the fire alarm in my house for half an hour. FML
Today, my apartment smelled like something was burning, so I checked the oven, toaster, outlets, and even the hallway. After an hour, I discovered the smell was coming from the candle I had forgotten I'd lit in the bathroom. I had spent an hour investigating a fire that wasn't happening. FML
Today, I woke up to the smell of cooking bacon. As I walked down my stairs towards my kitchen, I realised that the smell wasn't coming from bacon, but from my kitchen being on fire. FML
Today, I decided to make a toaster scramble. I thought it was bad enough when the pastry fell through the grate in the toaster over. Then it burst into flames. After 5 minutes of fanning the smoke away from the smoke detector, it still went off. Now my entire dorm building is outside in a snowstorm. FML
Today, I was making dinner when the smoke alarm started going off. I opened all the windows and stood there waving a towel at it like an idiot. Then I realized that the alarm was coming from the apartment next door. FML
Today, a guy I been seeing went to work and left me in his house. As I made a bagel, it burned, the smoke alarm went off. This activated a call to the fire department but I didn’t know. The fire truck showed up. Little did I know, the guy’s family was outside too, just to see what had happened, thinking I'd broken in. FML
Today, I was babysitting for my usual parents. After putting the baby to sleep I put some popcorn in the microwave and went to the bathroom. When I came out the whole kitchen was filled with smoke. One of the neighbors saw and called 911. I'm out of a job. FML
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Top comments
BritishHobo 0
You suck.
Happy_Elf 0
Dude, that sucks Dx You'll just have to do something equally as annoying to get back at her ^_^
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Comments (42)
leadrunner751 3
love the name
canadapwns 0
haha : p
Nyambi232 0
better 2 be safe than sorry. you never know what could happen.
GrammarFailure 0
Nursing home time. She's just a threat to herself and everyone around her.
seroquels 0
well look on the bright side, at least no one was hurt. still a shitty start to your day.
tchaikovsky93 0
Hahahahahahaha
truehitman2010 0
30 the muffin was k.I.a he was a good man helped the twenty second bluberry bragade capture the oven little did they know it was a trap :(
mrjamjama66 5
those old lady's are walking wrinkle sacks of all kinds of hazards
kingofchips 0
Mmm crispy muffins :)
hebron77 0
Start a mob and kick her out of the building, Spartan style.
simongergi 0
who the f*ck bake at 5am?