Today, a little girl standing next to me on the train suddenly hugged me. I thought maybe she was sad or I reminded her of someone, and hugged her back. Then she smiled, squeezed my love handles, and said, "Honk, honk!" FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, on the train, I was sitting next to a cute girl I didn't know. She fell asleep on my lap by accident and I just let her for the whole train ride. This is the closest I've ever been with a woman. FML
Today, I was dared to stand and hold a sign saying, "Free Hugs." This girl I'd never seen before gave me a crushing hug and cried hysterically on my shoulder in the blazing afternoon sun. I couldn't get her off. FML
Today, the girl who I have had a crush on for two years snuck up from behind me and gave me a hug. I farted very loud at the same exact time. FML
Today, I saw a girl I knew from high school at the DMV and she started leaning forward. I thought she was leaning into hug me. So I just began to hug her. She was actually trying to throw something in the garbage. FML
Today, I was sitting in a train when the old lady sitting next to me started staring at me. I asked her if she was OK, and she exclaimed, "Willy! It's you! Where have you been all this time?" The entire train trip went like this. FML
Today, as I walked on to the bus, the girl I liked whispered something to her friend. Curious, I asked what was so funny. She said she never realized that when I got on, I shook the bus. FML
Today, while on the skytrain, a woman leaned on the railing bar that I was holding onto, crushing my hand. My first instinct was to move my hand when she turned around and began loudly yelling at me for, "Touching her waist" and "Sexually harassing" her. FML
Today, I was on train when an attractive girl got on. There were no free seats and seeing as how my stop was next, I gave her mine. As soon as I did, the train came to an immediate halt, due to "brake problems". I spent the next 40 minutes standing up. FML
Today, a cute girl was walking towards me. She held up her hand for a high five, so I also did the same. I hadn't noticed her friend behind me, and was left hanging and embarrassed. FML
Today, as I caught the train home, a woman got on and sat on the only available seat next to me. We got talking and as the train approached the next station, she said that this was her stop and she had to go. She exited the train and I turn to see her enter the compartment behind me. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Doorhandle57 0
Hahaha what a cute little girl!
LLBH 0
LMAOOO ahaha maybe she was wondering wat they felt like ?:S
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (123)
aback 5
Did you yell "Bad touch! BAD TOUCH!!!" ?
Irony_and_Ivory 1
Ugh. *My friend doesn't WEIGH... not way. Summer is rotting my brain...
LMAO_over_here 0
LOLOLOL - too cute!
Irony_and_Ivory 1
For the record, just because you have lovehandles doesn't mean you're fat. My friend doesn't way an ounce over 110 pounds put she still has "lovehandles". Women naturally store weight on their hips and thighs - lovehandles are included in that. It's getting a little annoying how every FML story seems to turn into a "you deserve it 'cuz you're fat" lecture.
doctorbob 0
totally agree with that
dancin303 0
its a she not a he
NoNeak 0
I used to grab my ex-gf "lovehandles" but I didn't say "Honk! honk!"....lol you shouldn't feel too bad...=) Lovehandles are nice unless they're the "widest" part of your body...o_O
blameyourself 0
LOL, that's too funny
RoqueSand 0
That sucks, but I can't help but be disturbed by the fact that you hugged her back. Little bit creepy
BeQuickOrBeDead_fml 0
Lmfaoooo. This made me laugh soo ******* hard, you have no idea xD
Dabookofnothing 0
Be carefull little girl she might eat you if you get to close.
Dabookofnothing 0
you're eaither fat yourself and trying to get ppl to agree with you to make you seem skinny or your just plain creepy...
Colby_Colbert 0
eat another piece of cake you monster
seb12992 0
Just cause he hugged a little girl? And I guess I'm a rapist cause I tuck my little sister in at night. Moron.
thrawg 0
she...