Today, I spent half-an-hour trapped inside my dog's crate. The door locked behind me as I squeezed myself inside to stroke her. After bellowing at my family in the garden for what felt like an eternity, they came through just to laugh and take pictures. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I got trapped in my building's elevator for over an hour, with my dog who I had been rushing outside with because he had explosive diarrhea. FML
Today, as I was going to check the mail, a huge dog ran into my house. The closest room with a door was the bathroom so I slammed myself inside and screamed for help. We live far from any neighbors and my phone was outside, so there was no hope of rescue. It paced outside the door for four hours. FML
Today, I got locked out of my car while the engine was idling. The "good news"? My dog inside the car thought this was the funniest thing ever and barked happily every time I tried to open it. FML
Today, at 2:30 a.m. I got locked out of my room. I knocked upstairs to get my landlady to give me the spare key. Instead, I woke up the dogs next door who wanted to kill me, so I hid for 5 hours in the enclosed trampoline with some outdoor blankets. They were covered in animal piss. It rained. FML
Today, my mother locked me out of the house. Why? The dog and her needed some time to talk. FML
Today, I managed to lock myself out of my house again. My only option was crawling through the dog door. I managed it once before, but I must've put on weight because this time I got stuck halfway. My neighbour came over to “see if everything was OK.” He then helped push me through. FML
Today, I found myself locked out of my house. I had to squeeze myself through a tiny window around the back. While hanging upside down, my hood fell over my head. My dog ran through to investigate the noise and ravaged me thinking I was a burglar. I then fell and broke my wrist. FML
Today, my friends decided it would be funny to engage the child locks on the rear doors of my SUV. My SUV has a bolted cage for the dog separating the front from the back. Guess who was locked in their own car for 2 hours? FML
Today, my long-distance boyfriend came to visit. We went to a cafe where I managed to lock myself in the toilet, breaking the key. I then had to wait for them to break down the door. I came out to applause from everyone, who had been laughing at me for 25 minutes. FML
Today, I went to the gym and got locked in the locker room. I had to call the gym's phone number to get them to come let me out, after being in there for half an hour. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
dylanger16 19
Why did you put your whole body into the crate to pet the dog?
hotshot0185 15
You would have done the same to them if it had been the other way around.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (64)
Kendrah18 19
To pet her* you pet pets lol, you stroke guys. I'm sorry I had to hahaha.
mooman36 15
In the UK stroking a dog is the way you phrase it. I have never heard anyone use the word pet in the sense you are, other than on the internet.
roverman89 3
You're not too smart are you? Please remove yourself and your family from the gene pool
notfat14 18
Why would you put your dog in crate ?
Meepson 9
Natural selection would have had this end differently.
pickle682 17
You completely deserve this.
lilybadilly25 15
Hahahahaha! Don't feel bad OP!! I did the same thing at work one time! I went into one of the larger runs we have to check on one of our surgery patients and.. Not thinking.. Pulled the door behind me. They auto lock and can only be opened from the outside due to where the latches are positioned.. Still haven't lived it down!
SublimeChic4 15
Sooo YDI!!!
gintwinsmoore 20
my dog escapes from his kennel anytime I put him in there...why couldn't you figure that one out?
minimuni 7
no one thinks it's weird that he said stroke her
BeccaWella 15
Why is your dog in a crate anyway?