Today, my crew and I were berated by a client for not installing her new hardwood floor on time. We were only halfway through the day, but apparently it should have only taken "like, an hour?" because "The guys on the TV shows do it that fast." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, a coworker sent a last-minute request for a highly complex custom report based on a spreadsheet. It took most of the weekend and Monday to get right because he'd screwed up most of the calculations. The client was pissed; they'd wanted it done by 5PM GMT that Friday. He'd sat on the request until 5 EST Friday. FML
Today, I got some lumber delivered to site and that shit was so bent and warped I could've cut it into foot long pieces and sold them as boomerangs. My boss is breathing down my neck about finishing on time to a high standard of work, yet he keeps buying subpar materials on the cheap. Tosser. FML
Today, a customer filed a complaint against me because my coworker took too long to do a price check. I hate my job. FML
Today, we're in the middle of remodeling our bathroom and the hallway of our apartment. We hired a great guy and he does a really good job, but there's a lot of dust and no way to clean properly until everything is done. My wife is pissed with me because I work from home and don't clean everything every day. FML
Today, I had a huge amount of work to get through. Two colleagues offered to help, because one had nothing else to do, and the other couldn't work until I was done. My boss got really pissed at me for "making" them do my job and wasting their time. FML
Today, I attempted to assemble a piece of furniture that claimed to be "easy to build in minutes." Four hours and multiple arguments later, I realized I had misread the instructions, and half the parts were upside down. I'm pretty sure the furniture won this round. FML
Today, my wife got home from a 8 day vacation with our daughter. She was instantly angry and yelling at me for not setting the new lights she asked me to install to the correct settings; mad at the paint job I spent hours on in our shower being “not professional enough”; irate that I got a Roomba. One hour down. FML
Today, after days of my wife nagging me, I started working on the flat pack furniture she ordered. Every twenty minutes, she interrupted me to demand I stop and help her with something trivial and irrelevant. Now I remember why I postpone projects as long as possible. FML
Today, my crew was called out to do some house maintenance. We were nearly done, when someone had the goddamned fucking brilliant idea of washing plaster off their hands in the kitchen sink, which clogged the pipes. Instead of getting paid, we now owe for damages. FML
Today, I was scolded by my boss, all because I can finish most tasks in a quarter of the time it takes him, and he doesn't want to be shown up. FML
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Top comments
tiernang 21
some people need to do research before they do shit like this.
Nolimit2217 32
You can't fix stupid!
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Comments (49)
tiernang 21
some people need to do research before they do shit like this.
SuperPizzaMan_fml 11
yeah, you should tell her to prove that it should take that fast.
ohro 10
So, like, you mean those shows aren't real research??
EvilPandaxD 24
So true! Nobody in there right mind would be able to fit a floor in an hour unless it's a tiny room!
firechicky 12
I'd also hope that along with a cost estimate he told her how long it should take to do.
tiernang 21
she probably also thinks it only takes an hour to redo a whole house on extreme home makeover...
whiteboy896 9
research? It's common sense really..
agentx52 13
I hate clients like this.
Ayden241 10
But unfortunately it's the clients that pay you.
nattynatters 14
Just because a client pays you doesn't mean she automatically gets to treat you like crap. I bet if customers had ratings about themselves like companies do no one would help the assholes. Not without charging more.
dread514 11
type of client I fire... your $ not worth my sanity.
Nolimit2217 32
You can't fix stupid!
K410 18
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Well can't blame her she is just as stupid as the people on tv :p
lachy15 15
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Guns work.
Snazzy_Snaz 17
Uh, you can definitely blame the client for their stupidity
Redoxx_fml 22
Only in Flowers for Algernon
dragonsfireloki 5
Not even with duct tape
myeviltwin 20
The people on tv aren't necessarily stupid. I guess some people just do not realize those shows are heavily edited to cut out all the long boring drudge work parts. I once worked for a guy who's wife actually said that seeing as it was winter we should be moving faster and getting the work done faster. I told her ok you put on 20 pounds of clothing, then strap on 20-30 pounds of tools, then throw about 40-60 pounds of materials over your shoulder and wade through thigh deep snow (with ice underneath) and tell me you are going to move faster. She shut up but you could still see she didn't get what was actually involved in doing the work.
K410 18
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
And apparently so are the people that thumbed me down >.>
MzZombicidal 36
58, how are the people on TV dumb for editing out the long, boring parts of their work that would turn away viewers? If she had compared a part of her experience with Honey Boo Boo, or some crap, I'd understand your reference, but it was for a construction show, I'm guessing. So there... Hope that explains your lack of up votes.
jlaginski 10
Yeah, come on, guys. I like, thought you were hard workers.
taterrtots 25
what a dumb lady.
KawaiiCupcake 14
Who said it's a lady? Man can't be as stupid?
mif_fml 27
"installing her new hardwood floor"
hghrider123456 9
she likes it when guys finish quickly
threer 30
Who says they're guys? Lolololo
Infamous_Tora 12
People like her are why warning labels exist.. And why I think we'd be better off without half of the warning labels we have around..
isallwaysme 27
take away the warning labels for the very obvious things, and after a few years it will sort itself out. not as many stupid people.
obiewankenobi 1
Lol we should just let natural selection kick in
TheDrifter 24
I say we get rid of all the warning signs except hazardous area, invisible hazards and construction zones. If you can't decide what to do safely without the signs, you don't deserve the warning.
Chumsword 8
Hate to bring it up however, all thats gonna do is tie up courts with the same litigious dipshits that sued because the warning label wasn't there the first time. Ohhhh common sense, how I miss youuuu (insert catchy tune)
junkman6 22
The obvious solution is a mass genocide of all lawyers and then a reintroduction of things like the lawn dart. Also a removal of HOT labels from all hot coffee. Those 3 things will remove a huge portion of what's wrong with the world.
AlonMower 9
Sometimes, people just watch too much TV :)
andrewturtle 16
"People watch too much TV" - Would you also like to ******* point out that the sky is blue? Or maybe something less obvious like people sit on chairs too much?!
Epikouros 32
Give the client what she wants and just dump the rest of the wood across the floor.
BauerMegan 31
This. Do this.
BSuydam99 1
I agree with her
Wizardo 34
I seriously don't understand how people that stupid are still alive, I mean there's not getting work in class stupid and then there's life endangering stupid, this just frustrates me so much.
LowExpectations 30
Reminds me of the movie "Idiocracy". Stupid people will out number the intelligent simply because they breed faster and society coddles them.
tiernang 21
the world needs a new plague.
TheDrifter 24
We've got one. The dumb is spreading fast and quickly taking over. Now if only it was lethal, our at least horribly painful. Those infected with the dumb seem to be making everyone else suffer more than they do, they're not even usually aware that they're infected.
punjabtimelord 18
This takes a whole new meaning to the phrase 'floor it'. No? Okay.. ( ._.)