Today, I was trolling in a chat room when someone said, quote, "He's just a no-life, unemployed loser still living in his mom's basement. Probably spends all day stroking his tiny dong and fantasizing about having a real girlfriend." I actually started crying because it was so accurate. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was trolling on a My Little Pony forum. I was midway through typing a big post, calling them all a bunch of attention-seeking losers who act like morons because their parents never loved them, when I broke down in tears, realizing I'd just perfectly described myself. FML
Today, I was insulted online by a teenager, who said that I was probably a fat loser who still lives with their mother and a couple of cats. They were right. FML
Today, I had to explain to my friend that the hot girl he's been sending nudes to and cybering with for the past month is probably a bored, fat-as-fuck, balding male living in his mum's basement. The look on his face after I proved that "her" pictures were fake broke my heart. FML
Today, my friend told me she had a stalker who had been emailing her. I laughed, and told her it was probably some fat, ugly virgin sat behind his computer all day. I then continued to describe and mock the stalker, only to realise that I was basically describing myself. FML
Today, while eating at my college cafeteria, I started thinking about all the awful crap going on in my life right now, and I started sobbing. Some guy at another table started snickering at me, at which point the guy I like said, "Give her a break. If I was as fuck-ugly as her, I'd be crying too." FML
Today, I was looking at my friend's dad's Facebook pictures because he recently posted a status update. I saw him at a bar with some ugly hooker that he was feeling up in almost every picture. After about 10 minutes of ridiculing and laughing at this ugly woman, I realize it's my mom in a wig. FML
Today, I got break-up text. She called me a poor, broke, little dick, sorry excuse for a man and said that my mom should have swallowed me "as an egg". She also said that no one could ever want me. Thing is, I haven't had a girlfriend in 2 years. FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me and left me crying in the street. I then got a text from my mom saying how pathetic my love life was. Apparently, it was a mass text message and she accidentally added me to the list. FML
Today, I was looking at my boyfriend's rarely-used Facebook page as he was next to me. Last time he was online over a year ago, he had something up that said, "Still looking for that perfect girl." I jokingly said he should update it. He responded, "Why? It's still true." FML
Today, while in a hospital waiting room, a man started talking to me. After a few minutes, he asked me what I did for a living, and I said I'm a stay-at-home mom. He looked me up and down and said, "Huh. No life ambitions, huh?" FML
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Top comments
Killer_fel 15
Yeah! My I knew my comment was accurate!
HighGTurn 12
Karma biatch
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Comments (309)
Levvy 22
Translation: OP said this to a troll in a public chatroom, wishes this was the reaction he got.
davek 36
Owned.
Raider4life15 2
Karma's a bitch >:)
PrimeStarscream 30
You're pathetic. Go get a job and a life!
pagullarka 9
Don't cry mommy will make it better
EmaK13 2
You need to make your life better if you don't like the one you have now. Go under Indeed.com, and continue to fill out tons of applications. I did, and I now have 2 jobs. Once you get a job, look for someone who needs a roommate, move out and go find yourself a nice girlfriend. Good luck!
RocRach 5
That's kinda sad.... But you have the Power to change this!
tootall2breathe 8
Ok that story hurts my feelings.
lizardninja 0
Retard you deserved it op
bjg1009 3
LOL good, you deserved to get called out for being pathetic