Bad hair day By Faithy - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States Today, I got flustered because my hair straightener wasn't working. It took me fifteen minutes to realize I hadn't turned it on. FML I agree, your life sucks 9 918 You deserved it 49 036 Share Tweet Share
Today, I'm so deprived of intimacy that I got a raging boner when a waitress called me "hun". FML I agree, your life sucks 34 711 You deserved it 5 415
Today, I’m tired of women taking drastic measures to avoid me, even though I’ve done nothing wrong. Recently, I was talking to an old classmate from high school and she faked deleting her profile to avoid following up with our talk about plans. FML I agree, your life sucks 200 You deserved it 507
Today, my husband suddenly decided he was going to stop talking about all the changes he needed to make, and finally do them. That's great, except that in less than a day, he lost his shit at me and our young kids for not immediately fixing everything about ourselves as well. They're still sobbing and he doesn't care. FML I agree, your life sucks 1 045 You deserved it 146
Today, I was at work alone with a stomach bug. For some reason, our bathroom was out of toilet paper, so I had to quickly run to the nearest store to buy more, only to shit my pants midway there. I'm pretty sure the cashier knew exactly what had happened. FML I agree, your life sucks 43 213 You deserved it 4 214
Today, after months of teaching my parrot to speak, he finally demonstrated his abilities. I accidentally set off my smoke detector, and he's been wailing like a dying banshee ever since. FML I agree, your life sucks 26 940 You deserved it 3 853
Today, I found out my significant other of 14 years roughly has been with another guy for over a year and they’ve taken it all the way, if you know what I mean. While living with me. I’d watch our 4 kids so she "could go out to the movies with a girlfriend" of hers. I definitely got fucked on that one, not sure what to do now. FML I agree, your life sucks 739 You deserved it 127
dumbass.
you spelled blonde wrong :)