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Never going outside again

By Anonymous - 29/03/2025 20:00 - Australia

Today, I got back home after I decided on a whim to embark on a solo adventure in the Australian Outback. My truck got stranded due to rising floodwaters, and I was stuck for days without communication. Rescue finally came, but now I'm reconsidering any solo further trips. FML

I agree, your life sucks 176

You deserved it 446

Can't be arsed

By Anonymous - 21/01/2026 00:00

Today, my dad used to be suspicious of boys like all dads are, but just now he kicked me, actually kicked me up the ass, to get me out of the house for a date. His parting words were, "You’re 32 years-old and still living with me. Marry him, marry anybody, please, before I’m dead." FML

I agree, your life sucks 176

You deserved it 542

Who, me?

By Drive - 02/02/2026 09:00

Today, I waved at someone I thought was waving at me in my delivery truck. They weren’t. They were stretching. I still finished the wave and gave a thumbs-up because quitting felt worse. We locked eyes. I have to deliver to the same building again tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 176

You deserved it 202

Merry Christmas!

By Tree of life - 23/12/2025 03:00

Today, I bought a Christmas tree and carried it up three flights of stairs alone. I finally got it inside, only to realize it was too tall. I tried trimming it, but now it’s crooked, shedding everywhere, and leaning like it gave up on life. I hope the greenish marks on the ceiling won't be permanent. FML

I agree, your life sucks 176

You deserved it 321

Bullet dodged

By RIP me - 16/01/2026 20:00

Today, I was talking with my newly-single male friend, who I've had a crush on forever. He was rattling off his list of what he looks for in a woman, like, "Must want kids, must eat meat…" I got excited thinking I might have a shot until I heard, "Must be at least somewhat right wing." Fuck. FML

I agree, your life sucks 175

You deserved it 471

Locked down

By Anonymous - 17/07/2025 19:00 - Japan

Today, I bought the Nintendo Switch in Japan, only to realize that it is the Japan-locked version, and I can't use it elsewhere. FML

I agree, your life sucks 175

You deserved it 437

Ouch

By Anonymous - 31/01/2026 00:00

Today, I learned a valuable life lesson : Never attempt to swallow your pills with a swig of hot tea. FML

I agree, your life sucks 175

You deserved it 351

Pride and joy

By Anonymous - 07/11/2025 00:00

Today, my toddler finally used the potty for the first time. I was so excited, I FaceTimed my mom to show her. My kid then proudly picked up the potty bowl and dumped it on my lap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 175

You deserved it 384

Where are you?

By Anonymous - 31/07/2025 22:00 - Canada - Montreal

Today, I spent 20 minutes calling for my cat, worried she’d escaped. I found her in the bathroom, sitting in the sink, calmly watching me yell her name. She didn’t even flinch. I realized I’d been shouting “Fluffy!” at the open window. All my neighbors now probably know my cat’s name. FML

I agree, your life sucks 174

You deserved it 358

Crash

By Anonymous - 01/02/2026 12:00

Today, I was proud of myself for buying the lowest calorie option at a Subway that I could walk to. By the time I managed to get there my blood sugar severely crashed (it didn't help that two people in front of me were ordering subs for their family and coworkers). I ended up buying six cookies to stave off the crash. FML

I agree, your life sucks 174

You deserved it 264

Insatiable

By Anonymous - 07/01/2026 20:00

Today, my husband is a normal man in his thirties with a receding hairline and a dad bod. So why am I insanely attracted to him and just want to always have sex with him or do things to him? I can't stop myself. I just turn on when I see him and start sucking his cock. He can't keep up and hates it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 174

You deserved it 226

How could you?

By 13th floor please - 16/07/2025 22:00 - United States

Today, I was in a big crowded elevator and had to struggle tried to press the button for my floor because no one close to the buttons bothered to ask me which floor I was going to. Instead, I hit the emergency stop button. The elevator stopped between floors for 20 minutes. Everyone stared at me like I was a movie villain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 173

You deserved it 480

Enjoy yourself, it's later than you think

By Heathen - 07/03/2026 15:00

Today, we met my son's new girlfriend, who he met at church. My asshat husband cracked a joke about all the "new relationship sex" they must be having, offending her and angering my son, who said they were waiting for marriage. My husband retorted, "Who believes in that junk anymore anyway? Go have sex!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 173

You deserved it 113

Peace offering

By Anonymous - 15/01/2026 03:00

Today, after a silly argument, I decided to walk up on my boyfriend naked, but instead of a cute reaction video, I got a video of him yelling at me to grow up, get my ass dressed, and to stop trying to manipulate him while he’s angry at me. The argument was over the Lego we’re building together. FML

I agree, your life sucks 173

You deserved it 562

I just wanna go home

By Irish goodbyyye - 23/12/2025 09:00

Today, I tried to leave a rowdy Christmas party early. The apartment door creaked loudly, someone asked where I was going, and suddenly I was explaining my schedule to 10 drunk people. I stayed another hour to avoid more drunk people telling me to, "COME ON, STAY, HAVE A DRINK." FML

I agree, your life sucks 172

You deserved it 301

Chilling dystopian brainrot

By Anonymous - 28/07/2025 15:00 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, it's been a week since I giggled at my coworker who was worried our jobs will be replaced by AI, since we're delivery drivers. At first I was amused and sceptical, but some sort of paranoia has since kicked in, and I'm now imagining AI drones taking over our jobs and I'm bugging out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 172

You deserved it 375

Deviant Art

By Chae - 18/02/2026 09:00

Today, I got a request to draw a sexual art of a fictional character. Obviously, because that’s my job, I spent five hours doing it. I gave it to the person and it turns out it was a creepy guy I know and he tried to flirt with me by saying, “You are much hotter than her,… Girl.” I’m non-binary and only sleep with girls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 172

You deserved it 153

Classic

By Anonymous - 13/10/2025 00:00

Today, I threw all my clothes into the washer, including my favorite red hoodie. Apparently, I forgot a Kleenex in one of the pockets. I now own a wardrobe of pink, soggy tissue confetti-covered gunk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 172

You deserved it 339

Bled dry

By Anonymous - 11/12/2025 15:00

Today, my ex-husband stopped paying his child support so when I phoned to threaten him with lawyers, he didn’t care. Apparently, he lost his job months ago and has been paying me out of his savings, but now he has absolutely nothing left I can take away from him. Now I feel bad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 172

You deserved it 519

Hair today, gone tomorrow

By Frankie - 17/10/2025 00:00

Today, I unwittingly told the barber, “Do whatever you think looks best.” He got creative. Forty-five minutes later, I walked out with a haircut that made me look like a backup dancer in a 1990s boy band. My girlfriend said, “You're going to have to wear a beanie if you want to walk around with me.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 172

You deserved it 450

Did I ever?

By Anonymous - 27/04/2025 19:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I’d never felt like a ho before, until I was at a party where someone decided we needed to play 'Never Have I Ever', and I’d done everything sexual that people were coming up with. I actually felt disgusted at myself. I might need Jesus. FML

I agree, your life sucks 172

You deserved it 466

Femboys are where it's at

By Sex isn't great anyway - 02/01/2026 15:00

Today, I found out that my husband hasn't wanted sex because he's been fucking the feminine gay guy he works with. I could divorce him, but I like not getting constantly bothered for sex, and I don't want to deal with the stress of divorce. FML

I agree, your life sucks 172

You deserved it 250

Level up

By WhoamI? - 12/09/2025 03:00

Today, I got a bad performance rating at my new job. I was very depressed, and a colleague tried to console me. He said, "You're doing a good job for a level 59." which is a junior developer. I'm a level 63, a senior developer and a level above him. I don't know what hurt me more. FML

I agree, your life sucks 172

You deserved it 219

Dad of the week

By Fuck u brian - 07/12/2025 03:00

Today, I picked up my son, who was recently diagnosed with ARFID (avoidant/restrictive food intake disorder), from my ex-husband. My ex said, "Yeah, he's over that bullshit eating thing. I told him no video games or TV unless he tried something new at every meal." I hate this smug fucking prick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 172

You deserved it 627

Karma delivers

By Anonymous - 11/02/2026 03:00

Today, while squishing a stink bug, it sprayed directly in my eye. FML

I agree, your life sucks 171

You deserved it 393

Kids pick up stuff you say

By Embarrassed mom - 06/11/2025 15:00

Today, after a long, tedious and annoying wait in line at the supermarket, my 5-year-old told the cashier, “Mommy says you’re too slow.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 171

You deserved it 383

I hate my life

By Anonymous - 08/12/2025 15:00

Today, during a presentation, I gestured too dramatically and launched my pen across the room. It bounced off the projector screen, hit my boss’s coffee cup, and splattered it across the conference table. Everyone froze while I jokingly apologized to the table. FML

I agree, your life sucks 171

You deserved it 272

Judge Judy over here

By How are we related? - 15/02/2026 20:00

Today, I met my cousin for the first time in years. She's 19, but she's already engaged to a guy EIGHT YEARS OLDER than her, and they're planning to get married this spring. She said she's excited to have kids soon. She's throwing away her youth to be a fucking Handmaid. This poor girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 171

You deserved it 517

Pet peeve

By Cherry Bomb - 05/10/2025 20:00

Today, I had to interview someone for a news article. Nothing too serious, but the person I was interviewing answered every question with a sentence beginning with "I want to say…" It's one of my pet peeves and it took a lot for me to not ask them to stop or I'd walk out. Yes, I'm a petty bitch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 170

You deserved it 352

DDLG

By Anonymous - 20/09/2025 12:00

Today, I accidentally said "Yes Daddy” to my boyfriend while at dinner with his parents. They threw me out. My boyfriend did nothing to defend me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 170

You deserved it 517

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The Top

Today, while being intimate with my future husband, I reached over to stroke his cheek. The light behind him cast a shadow over my chest, and it scared me so much, I screamed then I farted on him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 365

You deserved it 2 840

Today, I was expecting an important delivery for a party I'm having tonight. I was in the shower when the doorbell rang. In my haste, I slipped and ended up with a bunch of little cuts and bruises. Turns out, it was someone trying to leave a note saying it would be delivered tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 754

You deserved it 195

Today, on holiday with family, it is now abundantly clear to me that being the oldest teenager I was only brought along as free babysitter for 8 cousins, all under 10 years-old, while the adults lounge by the pool, buffet, or hotel bar. I’m exhausted. I want to go home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 872

You deserved it 154

Today, I was going to bleach my bikini line, as I have not been able to shave there due to some ingrown hairs, and I also have to lifeguard every day. As it turns out, I'm allergic to the bleach. There is now an angry red, burning rash on my crotch that you can see around my swimsuit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 660

You deserved it 13 981

Today, after international flights while being five months pregnant to elope with a good man, which my family disapproved of, then paying thousands for his visa with limited finances, he told me, after I struggled with breastfeeding days after the birth, that he didn’t care about me, and had only cared whilst his baby was inside me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 528

You deserved it 448

Today, I was really bored and decided to annoy my mom while she was doing the dishes. I walked up behind her, touched her shoulder, and said "Poke". She then donkey kicks me straight in the nuts saying "Kick". I know now to never bug my mom when she's in a bad mood. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 384

You deserved it 38 615