By ouchmytits - 28/03/2011 06:42 - United States
The Top
Fortnite thievery
By Anonymous - 06/08/2021 16:01
By AbsentMindedGal - 21/12/2013 09:07 - United States
By Anonymous - 26/03/2011 22:26 - United States
By Embarrassed - 11/02/2009 01:46 - United States
Sharing is caring
By blackrose - 08/08/2021 02:01
By Anonymous - 19/12/2013 22:49 - Australia - Kensington
By Fatty - 06/03/2010 13:05 - United States
Alexa, play "Paranoid" by Black Sabbath
By ugh mom! - 22/04/2020 20:00
By stinky - 24/01/2012 08:15 - United States
By RustyGuy - 05/03/2010 18:31 - Canada
RustyGuy tells us more.
Classic
By Daniel - 09/08/2021 16:01
By me - 15/12/2013 01:49 - United States - West Babylon
By Scumbagmemory - 22/01/2012 04:17 - United States
By bittersweet - 08/02/2009 03:08 - United States
Rock, hard place
By coius - 06/05/2020 08:00
By TheLadyOpal - 13/12/2013 07:55 - United States
TheLadyOpal tells us more.
Aaaah! I finally got an FML published :D Awesome. Now to clear a few things up: I have had an irrational fear of sudden loud noises my whole life. Not necessarily the noise itself - (although there are exceptions if it's particularly loud, like the smoke alarm), but the anticipation of the noise - one of the reasons I hated school was because I would sit in class and worry about whether or not we'd be having a fire drill that day. And I don't keep an alarm clock. I have tried to keep one in the past, only to realize that if I'm expecting an alarm to wake me up in the morning, I don't sleep. I don't have a cell phone either, and I live alone, so to the smartass who suggested someone mess with my phone to set an alarm ring-tone, sorry to burst your bubble :P And no, I don't actually WANT to die - I was just thinking about this the other day and saying to myself, would I actually rather die in my sleep than wake up in the middle of the night to a terrible noise and have to maybe evacuate my house and call 911 and probably dissolve into a sobbing wreck due to all the anxiety? No, death is not the better solution, obviously, but irrational feelings tend to disregard logic.
Let 'em in
By I don't know jack - 16/08/2021 04:01 - United States - Canal Winchester
By littmild - 02/03/2010 13:42 - Norway
littmild tells us more.
The party wasn't at my girlfriends house, no.. Can't imagine why people think he would be pissed, it's just incredibly funny, and something we could laugh about for years. This is actually my first time posting anything here, the first time I've ever read comments, and I have to say I'm quite shocked how many people who misundertands this website. Like people who thinks you post things like this to get sympathy, or this ongoing debate on my alcohol consumption. I can't actually believe that there is people in this world who doesn't have more important things to do. Why isn't FML filled with "Today, I didn't have anything else to do than post negative comments on FML. FML." I feel a burden has been lifted off my shoulders, people! I felt a bit stupid for what I've done, but now I know I have a long way to go to beat some of you. And yes, I look good naked. Unfortunatly I was wearing socks that made me look rather fat.
By iltdtsm - 15/08/2009 16:58 - Canada
By Lizz - 06/02/2009 19:25 - United States
By Anonymous - 17/01/2012 03:19 - United States
By BritneyFink - 04/02/2009 21:05 - Canada
By Amy - 05/12/2013 05:25 - Australia - Adelaide
By Anonymous - 12/03/2011 23:18 - United States
Footie
By supras - 04/12/2013 02:03 - United Kingdom - Luton
Everything hurts
By waste - 23/08/2021 16:01
Why would I do that to me?
By car keyer - 02/12/2013 06:41 - United States - Mary Esther
By Anonymous - 12/01/2012 18:41 - United Kingdom
Kenny Loggins is penning a song
By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States
Keywords
To add to the details: 1) The Pillowcase is part of a full set, so if I can't manage to get the blood out... and anyone who has tried removing dried blood knows its friggen hard... It's going to be very hard to find a matching replacement. 2) The reason I was so tired is because I'm an animation student at BCIT, and am working my ass off to finish my demoreel on time. I haven't had a proper nights sleep in quite some time. Still; i probably should have grabbed a tissue.