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Stand your ground

By No justice anywhere - 26/11/2025 12:00

Today, some guy tried to mug me. Shocked, I threw a punch that somehow knocked him on his ass. I'm now staring down the barrel of a lawsuit since he was apparently only 16 and "acting out" because of his shitty home life, as if I should have just handed him my wallet politely. FML

I agree, your life sucks 639

You deserved it 63

You must be joking

By Harrold - 28/11/2025 00:00

Today, my new wife and I got home from our honeymoon, and not an hour later she'd sat me down for a talk, saying, "Now that you're married you've got to act the part and give up this silly nonsense," then banned me from seeing my friends, playing video games, and basically everything else I ever enjoyed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 608

You deserved it 133

Hope

By Anonymous - 25/11/2025 00:00

Today, after six months of trying, my wife was convinced she was finally pregnant with our first baby, which we put off having for years until we got our careers, savings and house where we needed them. One trip to the doctor's and it’s not pregnancy, it’s early onset menopause at 37. FML

I agree, your life sucks 566

You deserved it 137

Thanks…

By Anonymous - 18/11/2025 00:00

Today, I was told Thanksgiving was cancelled after I'd already sent $100 to my sister-in-law to help with food costs. It turns out that it wasn't cancelled, I was just uninvited so her friends could go. I can't afford a meal for myself. I hope they all get food poisoning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 555

You deserved it 69

Buzzed

By Head Cold - 07/12/2025 12:00

Today, after I watched my girlfriend get her head shaved in preparation for chemo a few days ago, I took the clippers and buzzed my long, well kept hair, gave her a loving hug, reminding her that, "We're at this together." She later broke up with me because I, pretty much, "look like shit." FML

I agree, your life sucks 534

You deserved it 107

Hogwatch

By Anonymous - 05/12/2025 00:00

Today, I was once again berated by an idiotic parent. I’ve been called a filthy liberal, a groomer, and had my job threatened several times. All of this because I was teaching second graders about pronouns. You know, the part of English grammar that replaces a noun. Nothing political at all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 502

You deserved it 115

Holiday season

By Anonymous - 25/11/2025 09:00

Today, I’m a recovering alcoholic. With the upcoming holiday, I have two choices; I can go over my family’s house who are all heavy drinkers and hope I don’t relapse, or I can stay home by myself and hope the crushing loneliness doesn’t drive me back to the bottle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 494

You deserved it 89

Rebel

By God help me - 08/12/2025 12:00

Today, my 15 year-old daughter decided that the best way to indulge her rebellious impulses was to sleep with the 30-something convict down the street, get pregnant, and try to convince him to let her move in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 465

You deserved it 111

Please be happy

By Anonymous - 10/12/2025 15:00

Today, I went all out for my husband on our anniversary. I planned meals, took him to a stage show, and got him a bottle of cologne he loves. He was moody, distant, and at one point crying. Why? He found out his ex-wife is getting married today and he couldn’t stop thinking about her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 463

You deserved it 77

Heavy sleeper

By Günter von Christ - 24/11/2025 20:00

Today, not only was I kicked out of the house, but also from the family. What did I do? Fought betrayal with betrayal. What happened? Someone cut my long well kept hair, which they all disapproved of, down to stubble while I was asleep, and they all acted like they knew nothing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 463

You deserved it 73

Tubular Bells starts playing…

By Satan’s child - 19/11/2025 15:00

Today, my parents tried to stage an intervention for me. Drugs? No. Alcohol? Nope. Gambling? Nah ah. They wanted to intervene on behalf of my soul since I decided I no longer believe in their religion. I had to threaten to call the cops when the escalated to attempt a forced exorcism on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 456

You deserved it 84

Sensaround

By Stinkygirl - 27/11/2025 09:00

Today, our 16 year-old daughter is still staging a protest because we won’t let her scummy boyfriend move in with us. She’s decided to go on a “bathing strike” until we change our minds. It’s been over 30 days and our house smells like an NFL locker room took a shit in a bus station. FML

I agree, your life sucks 452

You deserved it 92

No biggie

By Anonymous - 12/12/2025 12:00

Today, on a flight, a woman in a crop top reached up to get her bag from the overhead locker and her breasts ended up on top of my head for like a second. Total accident, no biggie. That was six days ago, we fly home tomorrow, and my wife hasn’t spoken a word to me since the breast thing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 448

You deserved it 75

Confuddled

By Anonymous - 25/11/2025 20:00

Today, I trusted my husband to take the kids to the park by himself 600 yards from the house so I could get some housework done. He managed to lose one bicycle, three wellies, a glove, and his wallet. I sent him back. It’s been two hours and he’s only found his emptied wallet and one welly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 436

You deserved it 86

Put your back into it!

By Anonymous - 22/11/2025 20:00

Today, my boyfriend tried to claim he can’t eat me out because he has a short tongue, a genuine medical condition that means he can’t do it properly. Funny, because I’ve seen him use that short tongue to completely clean out a Cadbury Creme Egg before without issue. He’s now sulking. FML

I agree, your life sucks 434

You deserved it 94

Kinda weird

By Cassie - 30/11/2025 03:00

Today, I turned 15, and I am allowed to wear a bikini now, so I modeled for my family. My brother (who's 18) was really wowed when he saw me. I asked what's wrong; he said, "Nothing, which is the point. I know you're my sis, not my girlfriend, but damn you have a pretty body." Is it OK that my bro thinks I'm hot? FML

I agree, your life sucks 433

You deserved it 165

Mental health day

By He needs help! - 18/11/2025 15:00

Today, my husband is furious with me for going behind his back and getting our son a psychological evaluation. His primary care physician, a psychologist, and a pediatric psychiatrist all agree that our son is AuDHD. My husband says no because he “doesn’t believe in that crap.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 420

You deserved it 125

Hoarder

By Anonymous - 19/11/2025 22:00

Today, my girlfriend came home with a Labubu. Yesterday she received two Labubus in the mail. She spent the last weekend looking at, and "researching" Labubus. There's Labubus everywhere in our apartment. I fucking hate Labubus. FML

I agree, your life sucks 420

You deserved it 95

How the turntables…

By Anonymous - 24/11/2025 00:00

Today, I learned that the girl who severely bullied me in highschool for being a lesbian just came out as a lesbian. FML

I agree, your life sucks 415

You deserved it 74

Nasty

By Anonymous - 23/11/2025 22:00

Today, I begged the people at my new job not to call my current boss for a reference because he is a vindictive dog shite. They called him for a reference, he tanked me, they believed him and withdrew my job offer. My boss also sacked me for disloyalty, thus proving he’s a vindictive dog shite. FML

I agree, your life sucks 410

You deserved it 98

Booze is bad

By Eight months on the lease left - 24/11/2025 12:00

Today, I caught my boyfriend drunkenly pissing out the window. Apparently, I should be happy he pissed out the window instead of just wetting the bed. When I suggested he drink less, he got furious and yelled that I might be a lesbian, since I apparently want him to be a "pansy girly bitch boy." FML

I agree, your life sucks 410

You deserved it 85

Rehab blues

By Anonymous - 30/11/2025 15:00

Today, a week after my girlfriend of 6 years checked herself into a rehab program 5 hours away, she called me and said I was too much of a toxic enabler and not good for her mental health, so she ended it and I have to move out before she gets home. I was going to propose when she came home. I’m completely broken. FML

I agree, your life sucks 410

You deserved it 130

Love stains

By Chloeeee - 18/11/2025 22:00

Today, I surprised my girlfriend with rose petals on the bed. Romantic, right? Turns out, the roses I'd bought had been sprayed with some sort of red dye. The petals stained the sheets, my hands, and our white-furred cat, who now looks like a tiny crime scene victim. FML

I agree, your life sucks 403

You deserved it 101

NEXT!

By Brito - 26/11/2025 15:00

Today, I found the girl I like’s Hinge account. Her prompts and things in common are exactly me and what I bring into a relationship, yet she rejected me. When I brought this up with her, she told me, “Well, you’re exactly what I want in a man, but I want someone taller with better looks.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 403

You deserved it 203

You made me realise

By Anonymous - 03/12/2025 15:00

Today, my boyfriend and I were together for 10 months when he told me I’m the only person he’s ever been with who’s made him feel safe and able to be vulnerable and open up for the first time… and made him realise he has trauma to work through. He then dumped me on the spot so he could work through it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 400

You deserved it 67

Idiot tax

By Dumbass - 16/11/2025 20:00

Today, my boyfriend came home, complaining about not having enough money for bills. He then pulled a stack of lottery tickets out of his bag, saying, "I hope one of these wins." FML

I agree, your life sucks 397

You deserved it 84

Help is needed

By Anonymous - 24/11/2025 03:00

Today, was just another exhausting day in which I cater to the needs of my kids, my cat, and my boss. I work opposite hours from my wife, we barely have energy to catch up and plan chores. I sleep 5 hours a day tops and have to work out daily so my back doesn't hurt. I'm burned out. I don't know what I need but I need it now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 395

You deserved it 89

Keeping up appearances

By JaneSimple - 02/12/2025 22:00

Today, just like every other celebratory day (like my anniversary or birthday) I ordered my own Christmas present. My husband doesn't get it. I tried to explain. He openly admits he has no idea what I like and has no interest in learning, but wants me to have something to open so he won't look bad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 382

You deserved it 113

I ate being proved right

By Anonymous - 06/12/2025 12:00

Today, I found out that my boyfriend of three years cheated on me with his ''sister-like friend." It's the girl I was always worried about, and half our arguments were about her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 379

You deserved it 78

What did you expect?

By Not Marge - 22/11/2025 09:00

Today, my husband is hurt and upset that our daughter legally changed her name the day she turned 18. I had to ask him, as nicely as I could, what the hell he expected when he named her Lisa and her last name is Simpson. FML

I agree, your life sucks 378

You deserved it 164

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The Top

Today, after giving my kids a lengthy bedtime lecture about the merits of being responsible, I thought about all the chores I had left to do, promptly ate ice cream in the shower, and went to bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 031

You deserved it 1 804

Today, I wrapped my boyfriend's Christmas presents for him, because he was too lazy to do it himself. This included my own present. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 592

You deserved it 6 351

Today, I found out my boyfriend has been using my moisturiser as lube when he wanks. It's $90 per bottle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 685

You deserved it 17 566

Today, my boyfriend decided the best way to inform me of his shoplifting tendencies was to steal stuff while we were at Starbucks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 309

You deserved it 4 472

Today, I found my sister's wedding book. Inside it was a list of potential grooms; she'd written down all of my ex-boyfriends. And my fiancé. We're getting married in three weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 954

You deserved it 1 881

Today, I was volunteering at a neighborhood house tutoring a bunch of kids. Everything was going fine until one of them jumped on the table I was at, which broke and hit my knee. I swore in front of all the kids and my volunteer coordinator. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 676

You deserved it 1 301