Jailbird By Anonymous - 06/06/2026 02:00 - United States Today, I asked my foster parents to adopt me. They said no because my dad's getting out of prison soon. FML I agree, your life sucks 431 You deserved it 49 Share Tweet Share
Today, I was ringing up a woman at work. I saw she'd bought a birthday cake, so I smiled and said I hoped whoever it was for has a happy birthday. She looked at me in disgust, told me to mind my own business, then called me a "chucklefuck bitch." Okay then. FML I agree, your life sucks 32 477 You deserved it 2 718
Today, my boyfriend and I tried roleplaying a teacher-student during sex. We're both studying to be actors, so we ended up going into a really deep, emotional storyline that didn't end in sex at all. FML I agree, your life sucks 45 091 You deserved it 14 602
Today, while walking around the local thrift store, I noticed an attractive guy watching me and following me through the aisles. As he followed me to my car I was sure I would get his number. He then asks me to bring my purse inside as I had been tagged as a shoplifter. I work at the store. FML I agree, your life sucks 27 799 You deserved it 2 541
Today, I got a speeding ticket. I wrote a check, and on the way to deposit my fine, I got another one. I put both fines in a box down town, and I turned around to see a cop putting a parking ticket under my wind-shield wiper. FML I agree, your life sucks 21 944 You deserved it 49 415
Today, I was cooking. I leaned over the stove to preheat the oven, and burned my nipple on a pot of boiling water. I also have a teething son who is breastfeeding. FML I agree, your life sucks 43 290 You deserved it 11 141
Today, I emailed my boss to let her know I was uncomfortable working over what my university’s 28-hour policy allows. She demanded I work 40 hours this week. In any other job, I'd be fine, but if I work over 28 hours, the university will fire me. If I refuse to work 28 hours, my boss will fire me. FML I agree, your life sucks 3 663 You deserved it 241