The Top

The most agreed on FMLs The most commented on FMLs The most favorited

The top of the day The top of the week The top of the month

The top of the year

Classic

By Anonymous - 14/08/2025 20:00 - United States - Seattle

Today, I met my new boss and went for a confident handshake. Somehow, we both missed completely and ended up awkwardly grabbing each other’s thumbs. Neither of us corrected it, so we just shook hands like we were in a masonic lodge. FML

I agree, your life sucks 333

You deserved it 108

Don't freak out

By Anonymous - 25/08/2025 05:00 - United States - San Antonio

Today, I moved cities to live with the man whose baby I gave birth to two weeks ago. I found a bra that doesn’t belong to me in the dirty laundry hamper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 446

You deserved it 182

Soda Pop

By Anonymous - 28/08/2025 23:00 - United Kingdom

Today, it's 1:30 in the goddamn morning and I can’t sleep because my boyfriend is so obsessed with KPop Demon Hunters that he's in bed next to me listening to the songs with his headphones at full volume. He might actually be addicted, as he says he physically can’t make himself stop listening. FML

I agree, your life sucks 335

You deserved it 90

Nope, not looking that up

By Anonymous - 03/09/2025 08:00 - United Kingdom - Castleford

Today, my brother let his kids watch anime without even looking at what they chose. He assumed it was OK because it’s just foreign cartoons. He is now blaming me for his kids' trauma, because I wasn’t there to warn him that "The Promised Neverland" isn’t just a Peter Pan rip off. IF YOU KNOW, YOU KNOW. FML

I agree, your life sucks 360

You deserved it 87

Friendly friends

By Anonymous - 17/09/2025 12:00

Today, I was at a supermarket when I saw a guy waving enthusiastically at me. I waved back, smiling like an idiot. He kept waving, so I waved harder, even giving him the ole finger guns. Then his actual friend walked up behind me, and I realized he wasn’t waving at me at all. The cashier witnessed everything and whispered, “Yikes.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 123

You deserved it 308

Psyched

By Anonymous - 24/09/2025 15:00

Today, I was psyching myself up in the office bathroom mirror before a big presentation. I was doing power poses and whispering, “You’re smart, you’re powerful, you’re unstoppable.” When I turned around, three coworkers were waiting silently for the stalls, watching my whole performance. FML

I agree, your life sucks 133

You deserved it 384

Goddamn Zoom

By Anonymous - 22/10/2025 00:00

Today, during a Zoom meeting, I thought my mic was muted. I sighed loudly and muttered, “I have no idea what this guy’s talking about.” The “guy” immediately stopped talking and said, “If you’re confused, I can repeat stuff.” Everyone stared in silence while I melted into my chair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 95

You deserved it 575

Protect the planet

By Anonymous - 23/10/2025 20:00

Today, my partner told me that he will never initiate sex again, all because six months ago I got him worked up then didn’t follow through. I didn’t follow through because I got pissed at him for throwing a cigarette butt into an environmentally sensitive creek. FML

I agree, your life sucks 192

You deserved it 329

Marked

By Anonymous - 29/10/2025 03:00

Today, I learned that bunnies mark for territory. And when I say mark, they do a 360 no scope piss and spray everything all over the walls. The smell is horrendous. FML

I agree, your life sucks 334

You deserved it 121

Serious business

By Anonymous - 06/11/2025 22:00

Today, I showed up for a Tinder date. I sat there for 45 minutes, waiting. Finally, I messaged her to ask if she was coming. She replied, “Oh no, I wasn’t serious. You just seemed polite. I didn’t think you’d actually show up.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 517

You deserved it 62

Kinda cruel

By TGIF - 22/11/2025 22:00

Today, I overheard coworkers talking about someone showing up with lettuce or something in their teeth. I laughed and joked it “could never be me.” Later, in the bathroom mirror, I discovered I’d had the same exact green blob stuck between my front teeth for hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 93

You deserved it 381

Risky business

By Bruisebutt - 01/12/2025 20:00

Today, after my husband whipped my ass with a belt the night before (consensual S&M sex, not abuse), I had to go to work and sit on a hard metal chair for eight hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 87

You deserved it 309

No biggie

By Anonymous - 12/12/2025 12:00

Today, on a flight, a woman in a crop top reached up to get her bag from the overhead locker and her breasts ended up on top of my head for like a second. Total accident, no biggie. That was six days ago, we fly home tomorrow, and my wife hasn’t spoken a word to me since the breast thing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 496

You deserved it 88

Sharing is caring

By Anonymous - 26/12/2024 16:00 - United States - North Reading

Today, after my wife just cashed in $160,000 in stock options, my Christmas present was two pairs of socks she bought with REI credit. I suppose it’s better than last year’s spatula. FML

I agree, your life sucks 482

You deserved it 127

Fidgeting

By Anonymous - 17/01/2025 09:00 - United States - Plymouth

Today, I was on a first date when my lactose intolerance decided to make an appearance. My date thought I was just “getting comfy” when I kept shifting in my seat. Nope, I was trying not to fart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 399

You deserved it 91

Not a wife guy

By Anonymous - 24/01/2025 08:00 - Ireland - Dublin

Today, I went to a restaurant with my mother, where the waiter complimented my "wife". I'm not 18, and she's over 40. FML

I agree, your life sucks 421

You deserved it 89

No thanks!

By Anonymous - 31/01/2025 12:00 - United States

Today, I was at a wedding, and during the bouquet toss, I stood back and let the single ladies have their moment. The bouquet flew straight at me, hit me in the face, and I instinctively grabbed it. Now everyone thinks I’m desperate to get married. FML

I agree, your life sucks 406

You deserved it 119

Parents of the year

By Anonymous - 07/02/2025 14:00

Today, I got to experience the rare pleasure of overhearing my divorcing parents admit that neither of them want full custody of me, or even shared custody, and then planning to guilt one of my grandparents into accepting custody instead. God I hate them both. FML

I agree, your life sucks 793

You deserved it 101

Carry that weight

By Sally - 16/02/2025 12:00 - United States

Today, I tried to surprise my boyfriend by jumping on his back for a piggyback ride. He wasn’t expecting it. We both ended up on the floor, and I owe him a new pair of glasses. FML

I agree, your life sucks 81

You deserved it 731

We're going to need more in the comments, please

By Uh-SLEEP - 25/02/2025 06:00 - United States - New York

Today, my obsession with Polish women tried to "graduate" and become my religion. The obsession I had caught from hearing other dudes' ethnic fetishes online was about to become the start of a New Religious Movement. Now I'm stuck with the realization that I have an incredibly cringey brain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58

You deserved it 629

Young love

By Anonymous - 28/02/2025 18:00 - United States - Staten Island

Today, I need help getting over my ex. We are always in the same class and now recently he has been giving me mixed feelings like he has been staring and smiling a little bit at me just like how he did in the beginning of our love and relationship. Please help! I wanna get over him! FML

I agree, your life sucks 328

You deserved it 165

Appalling behavior

By he didnt know - 02/03/2025 11:00 - United States - San Diego

Today, I showed my best friend a picture of my new girlfriend. He gave me a high five, followed up with, "Looks like we're Eskimo bros!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 321

You deserved it 132

Never enough, never

By Anonymous - 06/03/2025 09:00 - United States - Newark

Today, I got promoted at work and was excited to tell my mom. When I called her, she immediately asked, “What does this mean for my retirement fund?” and then asked how much I was going to be making. I told her, and she responded, “Oh. That’s nice, but when are you getting a real job?” FML

I agree, your life sucks 485

You deserved it 94

Many such cases

By Diane - 09/03/2025 22:00 - Canada

Today, I sent a text to my best friend venting about how terrible my date was going. I called the guy I was with a "clueless idiot." I sent it to my date instead of my friend. He responded with, “I’m sitting right in front of you.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 58

You deserved it 814

A bit rich

By Anonymous - 12/04/2025 05:00 - United States

Today, it's been months that my mom has owed me $174, and every time I ask she tells me she's too poor to pay me back. Girly bought an entire 180k dollar farm with my grandparents the day after I asked (also the money was used for gas, and she guilt tripped me into giving it to her). FML

I agree, your life sucks 346

You deserved it 103

Make it stop

By Kate is late - 16/04/2025 00:00 - United States

Today, I went to a friend's house and was so excited to try her fancy bathroom with a “smart toilet.” The toilet had a “sensitive” bidet feature, and when I tried to stand up, it somehow thought I was still sitting and started spraying repeatedly. I just froze while standing, as it repeatedly splashed water on my ass. FML

I agree, your life sucks 184

You deserved it 307

I'll get my coat

By Rossi - 17/04/2025 14:00 - United States

Today, the guy I like shared a repost on his Instagram story that said, “No message is a message. Take the hint and move on.” He’d left my last message to him on “Seen” for 4 days now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 179

You deserved it 355

Out of reach

By Yudith - 05/05/2025 09:00 - Canada - Montreal

Today, my male cat's cone is slightly bigger than his sister's. That means when he eats, the food keeps falling off his raised plate, he can barely reach it when it's on the floor, it passes his mouth to go under his chin, etc. He has to wear the damn thing for two weeks. On his behalf, FML

I agree, your life sucks 322

You deserved it 125

More cheese

By Anonymous - 19/05/2025 22:00 - United States

Today, while I was babysitting, one of the kids looked at me very seriously and asked, “Why do you have sad eyes like my dad did after he lost all his money?” I don’t even know the kid’s dad. I just wanted to make mac and cheese. FML

I agree, your life sucks 367

You deserved it 82

Big swinger

By Anonymous - 23/05/2025 05:00 - United States

Today, my penis isn't so small that I pee on my balls. It's so small that it fits between the toilet and toilet seat, causing me to pee all over the floor full stream. FML

I agree, your life sucks 370

You deserved it 134

FML on Facebook

Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Suspicious Sex Intimacy Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

The Top

Today, I went snowboarding for the first time. I was so scared I passed out. I was only on the kiddy hill. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 265

You deserved it 10 755

Today, I had a very important test. Last night, I'd had such bad leg pains that I couldn't sleep, so I took two very strong painkillers and went to sleep pain-free. I apparently accidentally overdosed, because when I woke up, I couldn't see properly or even stand up. And I missed my test. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 084

You deserved it 8 730

Today, I went out to my first Halloween event in 5 years, only to find out my boyfriend just saw it as an obstacle to playing Pokemon Go. FML

I agree, your life sucks 654

You deserved it 178

Today, whilst reading all 15 pages of this site, my French girlfriend asked me over my shoulder for translations, such as "What is buttsex?", "What is wanking?", and "What means farted?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 134

You deserved it 6 875

Today, just as I was about to orgasm, my boyfriend whispered, "Cum, my preciousssss" into my ear, in his scarily accurate Gollum voice. I think my clitoris just about withered away in despair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 225

You deserved it 4 178

Today, my mother disowned me because I wouldn’t fill out her visa application for France so that she can see her boyfriend. The reason why I refused was because my husband and I are on our honeymoon, and would like to spend some time together. I guess that makes me a “useless” daughter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 593

You deserved it 226