The Top

Hey, OP here, we had a big laugh about it afterwards. He knew I would love the reference. There was only one nick and he was pretty concerned after he made the joke. P.S. I've loved reading all these comments; they're amazing!

Bad boy

By Noname - 17/03/2009 14:42 - United States

Today, I was flirting with a really hot guy at a track meet and I gave him my number. When I asked him what school he went to he replied, "Oh, I don't go to school, We're from the juvenile corrections facility." FML

I agree, your life sucks 67 244

You deserved it 24 572

By boipucci - 22/04/2016 01:04 - United States - East Brunswick

Today, my drug dealer was the only one who wished me a happy birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 606

You deserved it 6 382

boipucci tells us more.

boipucci 1

Friday 22 April 2016 19:26

OP here. Thanks to the actual birthday wishes. Didn't do anything special, but thanks nonetheless.

Bye bye love

By unknown - 27/11/2012 18:45 - Canada - Winnipeg

Today, I ran across the street due to a line of cars waiting for me to cross. Just as I reached the other side, my iPhone slipped out of my hand and fell into the road, just in time to get run over by multiple cars, one after the other. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 109

You deserved it 7 369

Chance encounter

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my cat ran outside. As I ran around the side of my house to get her, I felt a gigantic spiderweb land on my face. I also felt a light thud on my eye and it started to tear up. I ran inside and looked in a mirror, the spider was in my eye. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 270

You deserved it 3 585

By Anonymous - 15/10/2013 17:08 - United States - San Francisco

Today, after months of exercise and diets and finally reaching my ideal weight, I told my morbidly obese cousin about my success, hoping to motivate him to do the same. He replied, "Why would it matter, you're still ugly." FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 402

You deserved it 5 804

By Xandriajoy10 - 31/01/2016 03:44 - Australia - Sydney

Today, I confronted my husband about a pair of panties I found in his office. They're his. He put them on to show me that they fit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 843

You deserved it 3 499

Xandriajoy10 tells us more.

Xandriajoy10 18

Monday 1 February 2016 0:24

Hey OP here. For those that have given support or made a joke, it's much appreciated. It's really helped to see the brighter side of the situation. For a little more back story; I was in his office originally looking for an envelope and found the underwear in the back of one of his drawers. We discussed it at length, I tried to make sure he felt accepted and not judged. It has helped our relationship more than I could have thought. I always wondered if he was holding something back, it's relieving to have everything out in the open. I did a little research and have found that it is common among men. As for only finding one, he showed me his 'stash' of bras and lingerie that he had hidden in his shed. Hopefully he'll be more open and honest with me about what he likes and what I can do to please him.

By hannaslifesucks - 24/06/2012 18:41 - Norway - Kleppe

Today, a kid got his hand stuck inside my store's giant gumball machine. He started crying, and his negligent trainwreck of a mom bitched me out for being "unobservant." I'd been mopping up the mess she'd made after she'd spilled an open can of beer all over the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 749

You deserved it 1 829