Work: I just work here

I just work here

By fishingforubies2 - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - Aruba - Oranjestad

Today, it was my first day working at a library. I expected it to be fun and peaceful, not to end up having to call the cops on a guy who started jerking off into a book. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 189

You deserved it 1 866

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Same thing different taste

Risky business

By PleaseCalmDownThisIsALibrary - 30/06/2023 16:00 - United States - Columbia

Today, I'm just a simple librarian. Last week, we had to call the cops on two separate aggressive patrons. Today, I had to call the cops yet again. WTF? FML

I agree, your life sucks 915

You deserved it 95

It wasn't me

By weliveanddie14 - 07/05/2009 20:27 - United States

Today, I was at the library. I went near the computer section when I saw this man cursing and pounding his fists on a computer. He left. I thought I'd check it out. As I sat down, a librarian came over with the security guard and pointed at me. I'm now being fined for destroying public property. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 945

You deserved it 15 687

By alwaysxgettingxshitxon - 03/07/2009 00:18 - United States

Today, I was working at the library. Some punks thought it would be funny to shit in a book, close it and return it in the drop box. The fact that it was sitting outside in the ninety degree heat for a couple hours did not help the stench; it was everywhere and I had to clean the mess. FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 247

You deserved it 2 952

By Anonymous - 21/05/2019 12:00

Today, while volunteering at my local library, a guy who smelled like crap followed me around all day. Every time I would bend over to shelf a book, he would start grunting. Apparently, he's going to be at the library every day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 969

You deserved it 112

Throw the book at him

By Jen - 30/04/2019 20:00

Today, I got fired from my job at a library for hitting an old man with a book. In my defence, I had asked him about a massive water stain on a book he'd returned. He told me it was his cum, wanted to know if it excited me and then tried to touch my boobs. Dirty old pervert. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 265

You deserved it 284

By rubgy_lover - 27/06/2013 15:02 - Canada - Surrey

Today, at work, I politely asked a patron to be quieter; I was hit in the face. I work in a library. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 134

You deserved it 3 927

Getting some action

By hugadyle - 18/04/2020 14:00

Today, I took a trip to the library's public computer section to get some important work done. After a bit of work, I went to stretch only to see that the man next to me was watching some adult films on his computer and discreetly touching himself. I still had 58 minutes of computer time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 639

You deserved it 187

My short hair!

By Trama1201 - 04/01/2020 14:00 - United States - Boston

Today, I went to the library to bring back some books, I walked up to the counter and the librarian turned to me and said "What can I do for you young man?" I'm a girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 803

You deserved it 337

Freakout

By LoLWut?? nd Why?? - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I went to a library to return a book that I've had for years. After a heated discussion with the librarian, not only did she charge me over a hundred dollars for the book, she also called the cops to escort me out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 742

You deserved it 48 210

By FallCameEarly - 27/02/2014 06:21 - United States - Alhambra

Today, at my job as a librarian at an old library, I was shelving books. Things were great until one entire bookshelf fell over. The damage wasn't too bad. Then the rest fell down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 139

You deserved it 3 888

Welshite 39

Saturday 25 July 2015 1:25

Gives a whole new meaning to the term "book worm".

wheresmymary 22

Saturday 25 July 2015 1:25

He was just trying to keep your first day interesting

Comments

fleur_de_fevrier_fml 22

Saturday 25 July 2015 12:08

sounds pretty funny to me :-)

FEATHDUCK 19

Saturday 25 July 2015 14:07

"I had my dick in the world record book, but then the librarian told me to take it out." Fyl for having weird people near you OP.

icehockey14 1

Saturday 25 July 2015 15:35

Sounds like he was trying to get his dick in the Guinness Book of World Records.

Omniprism 14

Saturday 25 July 2015 18:27

Hey at least you know there will be variation in your work.

Taurus_ChicKa 36

Saturday 25 July 2015 18:40

I'm wondering what the book was. Fifty Shades of Grey? :D

xKRIEG_SCHWEINx 11

Saturday 25 July 2015 19:10

must have been 50 shades of grey

FatherPlatypus 8

Saturday 25 July 2015 19:33

I don't know... Some books are pretty sexy, I guess?

krakalacka 14

Saturday 25 July 2015 19:41

I work at a library, it's all too common. Better get used to that and many other stupid things haha

tlnorman 18

Saturday 25 July 2015 20:34

I hope you got rid of the book. Gross. Sorry OP.

suddamYOUinsane 2

Saturday 25 July 2015 22:26

He's just trying to give life to words

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Keywords

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The Top

Today, I asked my husband for help with a household chore. His response was to fake snore and pretend to be asleep. Later, our toddler pulled the exact same BS when I asked him to pick up his toys. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 830

You deserved it 271

Today, I finished building a porch I've worked hard on for the past 2 weeks, and I was very proud on how amazing it turned out. Within 20 minutes of it being completed, my pregnant dog decided to crawl underneath it to have her puppies. I had to take half the porch apart to get to her and them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 240

You deserved it 5 531

Today, I woke up to find my freshly dry-cleaned $200 suit not on my bed. Instead I found my drunk ex-girlfriend. Not only did she break into my house, she decided that she wanted to sleep in my bed and threw my suit into the trash. I have a job interview today and the garbage men already came. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 451

You deserved it 3 013

Today, I went on a date. He stole my credit card. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 695

You deserved it 3 225

Today, someone finally pointed out that my 'Out of Office' message has been on for a year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 223

You deserved it 823

Today, I found out that I'm not actually allergic to chocolate, when my mom freely admitted to me that she made it up when I was a child because she didn't want to share any cookies with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 905

You deserved it 2 125