Dramatic Entrance Fail By FML Approved - 01/08/2017 03:28 It's not easy being cheesy... I agree, your life sucks 575 You deserved it 210 Share Tweet Share
Today, I had a dream where I was giving Justin Bieber a blowjob. I'm a totally straight male. I have half a mind to bill the little bastard for therapy sessions. FML I agree, your life sucks 23 979 You deserved it 6 011
Today, I made out with my friend for the first time. He gave me a hickey that can't be hidden. I'm the president of my church youth group and I have to help give a seminar on keeping your body like a holy temple... Tomorrow. FML I agree, your life sucks 11 953 You deserved it 62 410
Today, I went out with a friend to a bar. After several Cosmopolitans, I decided to finally call my ex and tell him everything about how I feel, and how I really miss him. In the end, he said that it’s all so sweet and he will call my later. He hasn't called me since then. Instead, I was blocked. FML I agree, your life sucks 231 You deserved it 1 466
Today, I managed to squeeze a testicle between my thigh and a drawer while doing the dishes. From the floor, writhing in pain, I watched my wife laughing hysterically while our two year-old ran up to jump on me. FML I agree, your life sucks 344 You deserved it 93
Today, I somehow managed to slam my trumpet case closed on my nipple. FML I agree, your life sucks 34 723 You deserved it 9 803
Today, while doing my boyfriend's laundry, I noticed that every single pair of his boxers had a poop smear in them. He's almost 30. FML I agree, your life sucks 500 You deserved it 103
Thank god the garage door was in the way, mom might have been just another statistic from being run over.